Some people believe in soul mates and get married when they think that they have found their soul mate. But after some years, things start falling apart, and both partners opt for divorce. The relationship is easy to build but not easy to maintain. You have to struggle and struggle hard with everything daily. It is not a bed of roses, there are happy times, and there are tough times. When it does not work anymore, it is the right time to get separated to end suffering, which is clearly not an easy task itself. Divorce is overwhelming, and counselling can save you from its adverse effects.
People go for counselling when they try to save their marriage. But if you have already decided about getting a divorce, divorce counselling is the best option for you.
Counselling for divorce is divided into mainly two different types, pre-divorce counselling, and post-divorce counselling. Pre divorce counselling is helpful in many ways; couples opt for this counselling that is going to finalise their decision of divorce. It helps them understand what they want and how to communicate with their partner in a civil way. It prepares them to deal with the trauma they have to face during divorce. It also helps them to make their children understand the whole situation. Sometimes it also ends up saving a marriage.
On the other hand, post-divorce counselling helps you deal with the trauma you are facing during a divorce. It makes the whole process easier. It is challenging to redefine a relationship with your ex after divorce, but you have to do this, especially if you have children. It is the best kind of counselling you can have if you have been in a long-term relationship with your partner. You can also use this counselling in addition to pre-divorce counselling.
The reasons to use counselling for divorce
Divorce feels like a loss because you are going to end a relationship. A relationship is not always bad, you have some beautiful memories with your partner, and you once loved each other. And if you have children, it is worst. It is necessary to be emotionally stable during this tough time. Some people can deal with this successfully by themselves, despite it being painful. But some people cannot handle it. Counselling can help you with that.
Some people hesitate to go for counselling for divorce; reasons can vary from person to person. Divorce is undoubtedly a major life change, and it can affect your mental and physical health. Divorce counselling is a crucial step towards self-care when you can handle the pain. If you have to take of your children, it is better to take care of yourself.
If you are still unsure of what to do, there are some signs that you should consider. If you have these signs during your struggle with divorce, you must try counselling for divorce:
- Sleep issues; can’t stay the asleep whole night.
- Feeling like you are a disappointment and do not deserve happiness or love
- Sudden change in weight
- Social isolation
- Loss of interest in everything
- Anxiety and depression
- Suicidal thoughts
Every person is unique, so the severity of these symptoms varies from person to person. But if you encounter any of these signs, make sure to go for counselling for divorce. Otherwise, you may end up having not only bad mental health but also bad physical health. It does not only affect you but also your family members and your children.
The Miss Date Doctor approach with counselling for divorce
Nia Williams launched the Miss Date Doctor platform after the death of her friend. Her friend attempted suicide after he could not deal with some issues in his relationship. She thought that something was missing, and she realised that therapy outlets were not easily accessible to everyone every time. Seeing a therapist once a week is not helpful. So she decided to start something that can help people with their issues whenever they want.
With The Miss Date doctor now, the client can contact his favourite coach whenever he faces a problem via Skype,face to face, calls or text, etc. they can also visit their coaches in the office if they want. Clients who are struggling with their divorce can take help from psychotherapists and professional coaches and enjoy a better life. All they have to do is to purchase a suitable package and life will be easier for them because you will have round the clock support.
The benefits of counselling for divorce
When you decide to have a divorce, it is a smart choice to go for counselling. It can be the most difficult time in your whole life, so it is better to take some help to deal with this emotionally tough time. It does not mean that you are weak or not brave enough to deal with your problems. It means that you want to get this done in a better way with professional assistance without disturbing your mental health. Counselling, during, and after divorce can help you in different ways. Let’s have a look at some of the benefits you will get from divorce counselling:
Communicate with your ex in a civil manner
With divorce counselling, you know about how you can communicate with your ex in a better way. It is necessary as, during divorce, you have to communicate with your ex-partner. In case you have children, you also have to work on their custody. At the start, it will be difficult for you because your emotions are high, and you may end up having a fight. Counselling for divorce can help you in dealing with your partner nicely, most probably without a fight.
Figuring out why you are getting divorced
Sometimes divorce may not make any sense to you. You always think about what were the circumstances that lead to divorce. Everything is unclear. If you are getting divorced because your partner cheated on you, you may think about it all the time why he/she did this to you. Obviously, not everyone knows about how to deal with this situation. Only a divorce counsellor can help you in understanding what is going on and why.
Getting rid of negative thoughts
After a divorce, it is difficult to think positively. Rage, anger, stress, depression, and other negative emotions overtake your mind. A divorce counsellor can help you in facing all these negative emotions. He will make it easy for you to let all these emotions go away. He will guide you about how you can find positive in negative. It does not mean that you won’t have any negative emotions, but you will be able to handle them.
Rebuilding your life
One of the horrible but most interesting parts of a divorce is, you have to restart your adult life. You have to move out and arrange another apartment. You may also have to stay at your parent’s place. In some cases, you may have to leave your job, which is not an ideal situation. Divorce counselling can help you in rebuilding your life. A counsellor can guide you about starting a new single life. If you want, you can go for counselling until your life becomes normal to support you throughout the transition process.
Helping you with kids
Divorce is not about two people who got married; it has a strong impact on children. Most of the time, it affects children negatively. Moreover, they are not able to spend time with their parents anymore. If you lose your children’s custody, it is very difficult to be there for your children when they need you. A divorce counsellor will help you with managing your time and counting every minute you spend with them without wasting it.
You may not need a divorce.
Pre divorce counselling is another type of counselling. You go for it if you have not filed for divorce yet. People go for this counselling in order to make the divorce process easier. But for some people, it acts as last time marriage counselling. Maybe you are not hopeful about your marriage anymore, but counselling for divorce can help you in saving your marriage.
Sometimes you just say that you want a divorce in an emotional rush; a counsellor will tell you that you did not act rationally and fix it. If you have other minor problems, we will guide you on how you can deal with them, and you will be able to repair your relationship with your partner.
The effects on children with counselling for divorce
Divorce has negative effects on children, but it is not true for all. There are certain circumstances where children get benefits when their parents want to end their marriage and opt for divorce. Still, if their are chances of negative effects, you can minimise or completely diminish them by taking help from counselling for divorce. Here is how divorce counselling will affect your children:
They will be happy and relaxed.
When two people decide to get, divorce things become rough between them. It results in fighting as both partners are bitter towards each other. This bitterness affects children negatively. But with counselling, parents start bearing each others indiscretions, and the environment is no more toxic for children, so they feel happy and relaxed.
They are more independent.
During counselling for divorce, children have only one parent around. So they start handling things on their own, it makes them independent and self-sufficient and can make them stronger in the long run it is important for them to understand life has it’s ups and downs.
It helps children understand
During a divorce, even parents don’t understand what is happening, so it is even more difficult for children to understand everything. Counseling helps parents understand and deal with the whole divorce thing, which makes things easier for children too. They will better understand and deal with the situation.
It will be easy for them to start a new life.
Divorce is overwhelming, especially for children. They have to start a new life, as they cannot see their parents together anymore. They have to stay with a single parent. It is a lot to digest for children. But divorce counselling helps them start their new life in a better way. They look on the brighter side of the whole situation.
New adjustments at school and home
During a divorce, there are behavioural changes in children. If they develop negative changes, it will affect their studies and behaviour at school. Minor misbehaviour in school can lead to serious outcomes. The misbehaviour of children at home is also not acceptable. But with counselling for divorce, you can bring positive changes in the behaviour of children. And understand how the divorce is affecting them.
The success rate of counselling for divorce
Dealing with divorce is not easy; you have to struggle hard. It is even more difficult if you want to deal with it alone. But if you ask for help is not a bad thing, it can save you from any kind of emotional damage. Counselling for divorce is very helpful. The success rate of divorce counselling is pretty good. A lot of couples are getting benefits from this, some couples were even able to save their marriage, and others were able to build a healthy relationship with their ex-partner. This also helped them in taking care of their children. All you need is an experienced and well-reputed cool minded counsellor or life coach who can guide you properly during this difficult time.
A relationship is not always about happy moments, there are ups and downs in a relationship, and they make it even more beautiful. Sometimes when two partners are unable to cope up with each other, they have to struggle hard to keep their relationship. But when nothing works, it becomes necessary to end the relationship. Divorce is not an easy phase; it disturbs you mentally and physically. So to handle this divorce situation in a better way, counselling is the best option for you. So if you are planning for divorce or struggling with it already, you must opt for divorce counselling. You just need to find an experienced and well-reputed divorce counsellor, and you are good to go.