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View past the shoulder of a man watching a beautiful young woman daydreaming at the beach sitting on a wall overlooking the ocean staring pensively at the ground

We usually hear phrases like if you are in love, you definitely know it. But surprisingly, no one can define love. Asking a couple about how it is to be in love is always a struggle. They are unable to come up with a good, straight forward answer. Thus, love is defined as a complicated feeling; no one can describe this emotion at its best.

It seems that falling in love is easy; you are helpless, right? But sometimes, it is easy to mistake infatuation as love too. If you have just been through a breakup, you can easily get mistaken with the feeling of love; it can play you really well. One is all over the place after a breakup, therefore, it seems easy to fall someone who tries to be your shoulder in moment of grief. Sorting out feelings is tough at this moment. It is quite hard to understand whether you are over someone or not. You are not always right about it. You might believe that you are over someone and you have moved on but then, out of nowhere, you just find yourself thinking about them.


One always knows when they are all set to start dating someone. But when you are in deep sorrow of breaking up with someone you loved whole heartedly; it gets pretty tough to sort out your feelings. Just remember one thing that you are never ready to be in a relationship until and unless you have gone by days and months, without thinking about your ex. If you still miss him and you have a new partner; you have just hooked up too soon after the breakup.

I still love my ex but I am in a relationship:

We all have been through the phase of loving someone too hard that once they breakup, we find ourselves stumbling badly through the process of living. Girls usually whine that I still love my ex-boyfriend and I need him back but they are already with someone new. Likewise, many boys realize it too late that I still love my ex-girlfriend while she is happy with someone else or maybe they have stepped into another relationship. Thus, stop saying that I still love my ex or my current boyfriend and go for soul searching to handle the situation.

If you are still in love with your ex and are involved in someone new; trust me, you are not the only one. Here are some ways to handle the situation:

  • Figure out your feelings:

The very first step is to figure out what you are feeling. It is not always the fact that you are in love with your ex-boyfriend and thus they are crossing your mind. There can be other reasons too. So ask yourself, why you are thinking about them? Do you wish to be back with your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend? Do you think it is just a habit that you need to break through? Or you wish to say something that you haven’t said? Are you frustrated and angry? There are so many reasons why someone might be crossing your mind and you need to figure out which is yours.

If you don’t love them, the fact that you are not able to get over them, can be challenging for your daily routine and your relationship that you are indulged in at the given moment. Even if you hate them, that is a strong emotion to get over. Anger and hate still keep you connected. Disconnection or being uninterested is what releases you. If they don’t spark the interest in you; only then you are over them. Thus, figure out what you are feeling! If you don’t wish to be back with them, then you certainly have chances to get the situation under control.

  • Decide if you want your new relationship to work:

Once you have figured out your feelings for your ex, it is time to see whether you want your new relationship or not. CONFRONT the harsh reality that you might not be willing to be with your new partner.

Also, separate the “I still miss my ex” from “I am not over my ex-boyfriend yet.” These are two totally different things. You might feel that you miss your ex because your new partner is no making you feel good enough. But if you find yourself saying that I still miss my ex-boyfriend and I want him back, then this is a sign that you are not ready to make the new commitment work.

While you figure out your feelings, you do get to understand the fact that you are having serious feelings or it is just a whiff of sadness that makes you think of them. Therefore, be very clear about your feelings for your ex, before deciding whether you want your new commitment to work or not. If yes, then it is time to talk to your partner.

  • Talk it out with your Partner:

Once you have figured out your feelings for your ex and you have decided that you want to make it work with your partner too, and then it is time to talk to them. Also, it might seem hard but it will help you understand whether your partner is worth the effort or not. An understanding partner will figure out a solution to help you out.

Whether you want to tell them that “I still miss my ex but I don’t want them back” or maybe it is “I still love my ex-wife or I still love my ex-husband and I am struggling to get over them,”; It is best to talk it out with your partner. This way, you both will come up with a plan that will help you move on and start living your life normally. It can take a while for both of you to make things work but it is fine. If you both want it to work then you will find a way.

If you think that talking it out with your partner will take them away from you and you want to handle the situation on your own then you can take counselling too. You can try one of our breakup packages and we will help you sort out your emotions for coaching and moving on from your ex.

Signs that you are not over your ex:

For some people, it is hard to figure out whether they are over their ex or not. They cannot judge their feelings and it usually happens with a lot of people. Thus, if you are finding it hard to understand your feelings for your ex, then here are some signs that can help you understand what you really feel. If you find yourself saying that “I still miss my ex-husband” or “I still miss my ex-boyfriend and I want him back”, then you need clarification of your feelings. The following signs will help you determine the fact that you are probably not over your ex at all.

  • You wish badly that your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend’s current relationship fails. You might say that I want them back with me so I want his/her relationship to fail. If yes, then you are totally not over your ex and you probably should not step into a relationship at all.
  • You keep wishing for them to contact you but you don’t contact them yourself. However, deep down you long for them to come back on their own. That is trouble because you are still involved in them mentally even when you both are no longer together.
  • You badly want to be someone new and better after you have broken up. This seems too normal right? You go for a run, a makeover and much more, to just prove them wrong and make them regret it. However, when you go for that lavish haircut, all you are thinking about is you’re ex right? The more you try to change who you are, the more badly you are keeping your ex in your mind. Why not stay the same? Well, because how would you show your ex that you are better without them? If you let them run your actions, you are not over them.
  • The wheel of emotions goes round and round when you see your ex post a photo on social media. You feel all types of emotions, which you should not, while seeing how happy they are. Then if you feel jealous or sad, seeing them happy in their life, then you are not over them yet.

Looking for help is okay!

Many times we indulge deeply in love and we do need help in coming out of our breakup phase. It is normal if you are seeking help because overcoming every hurdle on your own is not easy. offers you amazing packages which help you in getting the needed  therapy. If you think you are still not over your ex and they are pretty happy with their life, you deserve another chance at love and life both. You do eventually get on with life but living with the energy is very crucial. Thus, if you need to help to get over your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend, then you can easily click here  and get the required help within no time!

Also, some people just keep whining that “I still miss my ex-boyfriend and I want him back” but they don’t have the guts to go ask them if they both have another chance. If your ex-partner is already in a relationship, the only way for you is to get over it. But if you think that he/she is also not over you, then you can seek for therapy in this case as well. If you want to get your ex back then you can visit they help you in solving issues with your ex too and get back with them. There is nothing bad in it, is it, but only if your ex-partner is willing too.


Love is confusing and it can hurt to be with the wrong person. But at the end, love is a feeling that embraces you so hard that letting it go of it seems near to impossible. Getting over an ex and moving on from them is not easy. But if you are already in another relationship and you still find yourself saying that “I still miss my ex”, then you need to address your feelings and get them clarified. Look for help if you have to as you can easily go for counselling to seek peace. You can look forward to great help here

A wise man once said that love is blind and love knows no boundaries. Well, it surely doesn’t! But sometimes, reliving is very crucial and getting over a relationship that didn’t serve you much happiness is also very important.

Further reading:

How to stop loving someone

Family therapy online

Attract your perfect relationship

Improve my Relationship

Online Therapy




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Relationship Advice

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