My partner keeps putting me down

My partner keeps putting me down

A relationship is not about one person; both partners put their efforts to make their relationship healthy and successful. A relationship cannot survive if both partners are not supportive towards each other. If one or both partners are putting each other down, it means that they are living in a toxic relationship.

From the Crime Survey for England and Wales, it was estimated that in 2018 about 5.7% adults (16-74 years old) experienced domestic abuse. The percentage was higher for adults (4.2%) who were abused by their current or ex-partners as compared to the family members (2.0%)

Do you feel that your partner is not happy with you no matter how much you try to make him happy? Do you feel that your partner is taking advantage of you? Do you have to listen that you are not a good partner or are not responsible enough? Does your make you feel that you are wrong even if you are right? Have you been beaten up by your partner just because of a little mistake? If the answer to these questions is yes, this means that you are in a toxic relationship because another partner is putting you down.

There can be several reasons for putting you down, maybe your partner has a complex that you are better than them or may they want to dominate you and take control of your relationship. But it is not a healthy situation. No one is allowed to treat you badly, so you need to take some action against it.  Now you may think “what can I do if my partner keeps putting me down?” answer to this question is not that easy you have to be strong and practical for dealing the whole situation. I know how it feels when someone makes you feel worthless and insignificant, so I am going to give some advice that will help you in dealing with the toxic behaviour of your partner:

My partner keeps lying to me.

A relationship should be based on honesty, lying is unacceptable, and it ruins the whole relationship. Lying can be situational like your partner did something he should not, and now is afraid of telling you. Or maybe promises you something and did not do it. But some are involved in manipulative lying which brings emptiness into a relationship. A manipulative liar will try to clear their image and will always prove others wrong by lying and never conceding to error. They will never accept it is their own fault. Or will make you feel that they know everything and you don’t know, so you have to rely on their views and knowledge. It is really a bad situation in a relationship. They will even in some cases try to portray you as mentally unstable because you question their lies.

Further reading:Stages of a rebound relationship

My partner keeps putting me down; my partner keeps lying to me; what should I do? When you feel that your partner is lying and emotionally manipulating you, here is what you should do:

Confront your partner

Now you know that your partner is lying to you whatever the reason is, you need to talk to them. Ask them why they are doing this but do this in a calm way not confrontational. I know you are hurt, and that does not mean you should throw it in their face. Talk about how you felt about all this and tell them that you do not want this to happen again. Communicate try to compromise and come to a resolution.

Seek professional help

Manipulative lying is not bearable, once you realize that your partner is lying to you talking to them and sorting out the issue is a good thing lying destroys relationships. But sometimes it is because of some mental health issues or self- esteem issues, and it can affect your relationship deeply, so it is better to seek help from professionals to mediate and guide you. Couples counseling is the best for you.

My partner keeps shouting at me

Nobody likes to be shouted at; it is very disrespectful. Yelling and screaming have a negative impact on relationships. It puts the person who is receiving this shouting in an awkward position. There could be several reasons behind shouting, including stress, depression or job pressure. It could also be because of some other mental issue emotional trauma or depression but keep in mind that shouting back is not a solution. You need to deal with it calmly, your partner’s behaviour is hurting you, but if you deal with it wisely you can save your relationship from falling apart. Here is what you can do:

Stay calm

When a person is shouting at you, it means he or she is currently in a bad mood, so it is the responsibility of the other partner to keep calm. At that time, don’t try to defend yourself or start arguing because it only adds fuel to the fire. Think about the things that can help you to cool your partner down.

Try to know why he or she is behaving this way

There was something that triggered them or irritated them, try to figure out what it was and try not to do it next time understanding your partners character and triggers helps decrease arguments. They may blame you for a lot of things, but that does not mean you need to agree to calm them down, it would be better you don’t answer the things you feel are wrong. It is advisable you suggest you have a more in depth discussion when you have both calmed down.

Don’t support this behaviour.

You cannot justify shouting because it is not healthy at all. So make them understand that this behaviour is not acceptable set healthy boundaries with your partner and let them know you will not tolerate disrespect.. They cannot shout at you whenever they feel upset. So you have to resist entertaining and enabling this bad behaviour , once you make him feel comfortable in this mode with no repercussions, it will become a habit. So you have to tell him that you will not tolerate this behaviour next time.

My partner keeps telling me to leave.

When your partner is in a bad mood or angry, there are chances that they will ask you to leave. Sometimes it is because of something you did wrong. If this is the case, make sure to apologize and tell them you will never do it again but within reason being asked to leave all the time is harsh and should be a last resort. And sometimes there are chances that they are going through a bad phase, they are stressed because of their job or friends and family related issues, or it is because of some trauma they faced in the past. In this case, your partner needs your emotional support so be there for them. Tell them that everything will be fine. If it is still not working, seek help from professionals and get the support you need.

But sometimes it is not about you or their problems but about their nature. They may want to dominate you and will make you feel that this relationship and you are not important to them, and you can leave. Their words will hurt you for sure but don’t blame yourself for anything. You are trying your best to keep your relationship alive, and if your partner does not seem interested, it is time to talk to them.

My partner is putting me down and my partner keeps telling me to leave, what should I do? All you need is to talk calmly about your feelings. Tell them you are not okay with this behaviour and if they are not improving their behaviour, it is time to leave them. I know it will be difficult for you, but believe me, having toxic people in your life will ruin your happiness and future.

My partner keeps me awake at night.

Sharing a bed with someone is not easy, and when two people are in relationships having different sleep patterns can ruin the relationship. A study held on partners of opposite sex showed that in most cases, men are responsible for disturbing the sleep of their partner. It also showed that men snore more than women and are rowdier than women in bed.

If your partner has these problems and you are not comfortable with them, buy a master bed or a really large bed. Also, if you have problems with room temperature because of different body temperature, try considering separate blankets for both of you. If nothing works, try considering separate beds for each. These are general reasons that can be treated well by talk or taking care of each other’s comfort.

When two people are in a healthy relationship and want to be committed, they try to compromise and make a better sleep routine that is healthy for their relationship. But if one partner tries to be selfish, does not want to compromise and ask you to adjust your sleeping schedule according to them, it is not right. If you feel like a little adjustment is not a problem for you, then go for it but do not change yourself for a person who is not worth it. You have your own identity, and that should be more important for you. But let me inform you my partner keeps me awake at night is a very common issue you are not alone. It is also important to remember there are options available at the chemist that assist with snoring and with other sleeping issues.

My partner keeps threatening to leave me.

It is very common to say something bad when you are upset or angry as I mentioned above, but that does not mean it is right to end a relationship. If your partner is threatening to leave you, it means that they are trying to manipulate you and use your emotions against you. They may say things like that, “I will leave you if you will not stop seeing your friend”. Or both of you are fighting;and you said something, and once again your partner threatens to leave you. It means that they are using your relationship as a weapon against you  . They will ask you to do things the way they want, and if you do notcomply , they will threaten to leave you. If your partner is saying this because of anger or is upset it is okay you guys can talk it out later and sort it outwe all say things in the heat of the moment. Keep in mind that you don’t have to make them feel okay about it. This should not become a common occurrence in your relationship.

But if your partner threatens to leave you more often, it is not good behaviour. So, confront your partner and tell them that you will not accept this kind of behaviour. If still, your partner is not willing to taking your complaints serious, you need to find a real solution. If your partner really loves you and wants to be with you, they must show more respect and sensitivity towards your feelings; you are not asking something impossible. It is good for both of you and your relationship threats should not be part of a relationship..

My partner keeps leaving me

Being in a relationship is not a bed of roses. It is not like you will just have happy days but you also have bad days. Fighting is common in a relationship, and to be very honest; it makes your relationship strong. Sometimes a partner is having a bad time and othertimes is doing well. This is life. But what is the most important thing? It is support, respect and appreciation. When your partner is in a bad situation, all your needs is your support and your appreciation. They want you to be there for them.

Just imagine for a while you are doing all you should do, you are supportive when they are having a bad time, you make them feel good about themselves, but when you need them, they just disappear. They leave you after a fight and come back when they think it is okay. They leave you when you are in a tough situation; they don’t appreciate you. You feel alone, and you think “why doesmy partner keep putting me down even when I do my best”. Please, keep in mind it is not your fault if someone is being selfish and emotionally immature. If your partner keeps leaving you when you need they support badly, what is the point of having a relationship? Tell them that you are not okay with this and end your relationship with such a manipulative and selfish person.  Relationships are about consistency, reliability and respect if you find yourself in a situation of my partner keeps leaving me it’s time to move on.

My partner keeps hitting me.

Stats show that domestic abuse has more victims than any other crime. It is the least reported crime to the police. Every 1 in 4 women and every 1 in 6 men is affected by domestic abuse in their whole life.

It is not a healthy ratio. Honestly, if you ask me, hitting your partner is the worst thing you can do, and after this, a relationship is totally ruined. But some people are so manipulative that they will not feel bad about it but will make you feel that it was all your fault. Whatever the reason maybe there is no justification for beating or hitting your partner. If your partner is doing so don’t be afraid, ask for help from the police and family and friends.

In most cases, partners who experience domestic abuse do not take it much seriously, and they stay with a partner. The main reason behind this is love; they think that their partner will change one day. They will leave this bad habit and will start loving them if I do all they want. But unfortunately, it is not true for a toxic person. All they want is to control you; first, they do this via manipulating and then forcefully. You need to accept that they are not going to change themselves, and there is nothing good left in this violent relationship.

Some people also stay with their abusive partner because they are afraid or they have kids. They can’t leave them because they think their partner will ruin their afterlife or it will not be good for kids. But the reality is opposite, a toxic environment consisting of beating and hitting is not healthy for kids. Domestic abuse is unacceptable, so immediately this person and report it to police. Do not ruin your life for a toxic person. Call 0333344853 now to get support and have a free consultation.

My partner keeps things from me

Honesty and trust are two very important things in a relationship. Still, sometimes it becomes difficult to figure out if your partner is honest with you or not. Sometimes you feel the change in their habits; you see that they are very possessive about their phone; you may also feel contradictions in what they say and what they do. Well, it does not mean they are dishonest with you but hiding something from your partner is not a good thing.

You should be honest with your partner and should hide nothing from them. If you are feeling that your partner is hiding something, the chances are that you are overthinking. But if you see a clear change in their habits, maybe you are right if you think my partner keeps hiding things from me and you have empirical evidence of that you must investigate and communicate this to them. But it does not mean that you should confront them for cheating or other accusations fact check don’t make accusations. First of all, you need to respect their privacy and wait for them to tell you. It is good if they tell you everything themselves, but if they are not telling you and you are not feeling right about it, maybe it is a time to talk to them. You know nothing, so don’t show aggressive behaviour or pass judgments, talk to them in a calm way. Share what you feel about the whole thing and ask for an explanation. Transparency is imperative for a long lasting relationship.

Conclusion

If you feel like “My partner keeps putting me down” the chances are that you are in a toxic relationship. So you need to figure it out where do you stand in your relationship and make the decision accordingly. If you are having trouble with your partner and relationship and cannot handle it yourself go for couples counseling, a professional can guide you properly. Keep in mind that you are worthy of love and you should also treat your partner with love and respect, but if you are not getting the same response from the opposite side, it would be better to leave. Never be afraid to leave a toxic situation if your partner does not treat you correctly always remember there are others that will. Happiness is everything.

References

https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/crimeandjustice/bulletins/domesticabuseinenglandandwalesoverview/november2019#:~:text=According%20to%20the%20Crime%20Survey,last%20year%20(Figure%201).&text=Of%20these%2C%2043%25%20(570%2C581,subsequently%20recorded%20as%20a%20crime

https://theprivatetherapyclinic.co.uk/when-your-partner-keeps-putting-you-down/

https://www.bustle.com/p/if-your-partner-lets-you-down-in-these-9-small-ways-they-may-not-love-you-the-way-you-deserve-12016418

https://www.symbis.com/blog/what-to-do-when-a-spouse-lies/

https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/6-effective-ways-to-how-to-stop-your-husband-from-yelling-at-you/

https://www.lifehack.org/627394/the-best-way-to-react-when-someone-is-shouting-at-you-in-anger

https://www.nbcnews.com/know-your-value/feature/your-partner-ruining-your-sleep-here-s-how-fix-it-ncna1044931#:~:text=Research%20shows%20that%20partners%20of,marital%20dissatisfaction%2C%20according%20to%20Dr

https://greatist.com/happiness/sharing-a-bed-sleep-quality#1

https://www.bustle.com/p/if-your-partner-ever-says-these-11-things-you-should-break-up-8613344

https://www.marriagebuilders.com/my-spouse-hit-me-now-what.htm

https://www.bustle.com/p/if-your-partner-does-these-7-common-things-they-may-be-hiding-something-9581127

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