RELATIONSHIP COUNSELLING IN GOLDERS GREEN, BARNET, LONDON NW11 MISS DATE DOCTOR

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Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. In our experience, when there are problems in a relationship, one partner tends to be more motivated to seek help whilst their spouse is often less enthusiastic to come along for counselling.

 

We find there are several reasons for this.  Sometimes partners feel that they should be able to solve their problems without the help of a professional. In some cases, they may even deny that any serious problem exists at all!

 

Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. Research has found that, in general, the more willing a partner is to go for help, the more likely it is that the relationship can be improved and even saved!  Is there a good time for going for couple counselling?

 

People who find themselves trapped in a cycle of negativity and conflict in their relationship and who find it increasingly difficult or even impossible to change this pattern should in our opinion seek help without delay.

 

It is our experience that many couples wait too long before going for counselling. Why do we say that? There seems to be a “window of opportunity” to save a relationship that is in trouble – when there is still enough commitment and goodwill between the partners and both are motivated to work at improving things between them.

 

Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. If you wait too long, you run the risk that one or both of you may lose the momentum to change the relationship for the better and the spark will be no longer there to reignite.

 

What can you do if your partner refuses to come for counselling?

 

Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. Apart from stressing that your relationship is extremely important to you and that you hope your partner feels the same way, you could suggest that you both come along for a free, no-obligation, 30-minute consultation session to meet with one of the psychologists.

 

This often serves to break the ice and would allow us to explain the process and address any reservations and concerns that your partner may have.

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Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. The major aim of therapy is to increase your knowledge about yourself, your partner, and the patterns of interaction between you. Therapy becomes effective as you apply new knowledge to break ineffective patterns and develop better ones.

 

The key tasks of Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor are increasing your clarity about:

 

• The kind of life you want to build together
• The kind of partner you aspire to be to build the kind of life and relationship you want to create
• Your blocks to becoming the kind of partner you aspire to be
• The skills and knowledge necessary to do the above tasks
• Tradeoffs and Tough Choices

 

Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. To create sustained improvement in your relationship you need:

 

• A vision of the life you want to build together
• To have a life separate from your partner because you are not joined at the hip
• The appropriate attitudes and skills to work as a team
• The motivation to persist
• Time to review progress
• To create the relationship you desire, there will be some difficult tradeoffs and tough choices for each person.

 

Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. The first tradeoff will be time. It simply takes time to create a relationship that flourishes: time to be together, time to be with family, time to play, coordinate, nurture, relax, hang out and plan. This time will encroach on some other valuable areas – your personal or professional time.

 

The second compromise is comfort. That means emotional comfort, like going out on a limb to try novel ways of thinking or doing things, listening and being curious instead of butting in, and speaking up instead of becoming resentfully compliant, or withdrawing.

 

Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. In the beginning, there will be an emotional risk in taking action, but you will never explore different worlds if you always keep sight of the shoreline.

 

In addition, few people are emotionally comfortable being confronted with how they don’t live their values or being confronted with the consequences of their actions.

BENEFITS OF RELATIONSHIP COUNSELLING IN GOLDERS GREEN, BARNET, LONDON NW11 MISS DATE DOCTOR FOR COUPLES AND SINGLES

Relationship Counselling Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. From my many years working as a relationship and couples counsellor, there are five key benefits that I see time and time again that ensures the process works for so many people.

 

1. Relationship counselling creates a breathing space

 

When I meet couples for the first time, most feel a palpable sense of relief. This comes from accepting they have a relationship problem and have taken the first steps to try to resolve it.

 

Relationship Counselling Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. If they have already tried unsuccessfully to sort out things for themselves, booking an appointment is also the first acknowledgment that they require a bit of outside support.

 

Although there’s no guarantee’s the counselling process will be successful, many couples feel strongly that even if they do separate, at least they will have tried everything.

 

2. It provides a weekly, supportive and reflective space

 

Relationship Counselling Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor provides a weekly supportive, reflective space to talk about the relationship and communicate with each other constructively.

 

The structure provides something very different from what most couples experience when trying to talk about their relationship at home. For the hour of therapy, there are no distractions and no more pressing things to do.

 

Disagreements are also the raw material we use as a means of understanding more about the strong feelings involved. We focus on reflecting, on the feelings each person in the couple experiences, consider different perspectives, and work together to resolve things.

 

3. Understanding the deeper feelings that drive us

 

One of the most important aspects of relationship therapy is taking some time to explore how each of the couple’s childhood experiences might be affecting their current relationships. Many people have experienced situations from the past, which bring up strong feelings when they feel they are replicated in the present.

 

Relationship Counselling Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. If unidentified, it’s all too easy for couples to inadvertently keep pushing each other’s buttons, leading to damaging arguments which they often tell me are “over nothing really” but do corrosive damage to the relationship, because such strong feelings are involved.

 

Knowing what’s behind such intense feelings often helps couples understand what’s going on and be a bit less reactive. Conflict becomes healthier because it’s based on the present.

 

4. Relationship therapy promotes a more constructive type of communication

 

Relationship Counselling Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. Without a doubt, one of the most helpful aspects of relationship therapy is how it helps couples learn to communicate with each other more constructively. In relationship therapy, each couple gets to tell the therapist how they feel about certain aspects of their relationship.

 

Their partner has the opportunity to just listen, freed from having to defend themselves, respond, or try to reach a compromise. There’s also no need to try to interrupt their partner because they know they’ll also get a chance to give their perspective to the therapist with their partner listening.

 

RELATIONSHIP COUNSELLING IN GOLDERS GREEN, BARNET, LONDON NW11 MISS DATE DOCTOR CONCLUSION

Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor Conclusion. You can’t create a flourishing relationship by only fixing what’s wrong. But it’s a start.

 

Grace under pressure does not spring full-grown even with the best of intentions – practice, practice, and more practice. Practice the right things and you will get there.

 

Love is destroyed when self-interest dominates.

 

If you don’t know what you feel in important areas of your relationship, it is like playing high-stakes poker when you see only half your cards. You will make a lot of dumb plays.

 

Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor Conclusion. The possibility exists that we choose partners we need but don’t necessarily want. To get to the bottom of a problem often means you first accept how complex it is.

 

Trust is the foundational building block of a flourishing relationship.

You create trust by doing what you say you will do.

 

It’s impossible to be in a highly interdependent relationship without ever being judgmental or being judged.

 

Relationship Counselling In Golders Green, Barnet, London NW11 Miss Date Doctor. If you strive to always feel emotionally safe in your relationship and get it, you will pay the price by becoming dull.

 

If neither of you ever rocks the boat, you will end up with a dull relationship

 

Knowledge is not power. Only knowledge that is applied is power.

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