Leaving a long term relationship
How do you leave a long-term relationship?
Leaving a long-term relationship is not easy, not only for the one who is being dumped but also for the one who is dumping. You have many good memories with that person, and it does not seem easy to end this now. But you need to understand that it is for the best; there is a solid reason behind ending this long-term relationship. If not, give it a second thought, but if you are sure that there is no other solution to whatever the problem is in your relationship, talk to your partner. Have a conversation about how you feel and why you want this relationship to end. Be prepared for the worst scenarios and try to be cool-minded. Be clear about what you want and deliver your message respectfully.
Leaving a long-term relationship is tough, but if you have decided it is what you want, you need to act on it. Because there is no point of being in a relationship, you do not feel interested in anymore. This article is all about leaving a long-term relationship. Read the full article, and you will not be disappointed:
Contemplating leaving a long term relationship
Have you been in a situation where you keep wondering whether you are in the right relationship or not? Are you confused about whether you two are right for each other? Maybe you continuously think about whether you should stay in this relationship or not. I know it is the worst feeling ever the confliction and the stress can be overwhelming.
But if you are having second thoughts about your relationship and you are not feeling happy, you will not feel comfortable in this relationship. And one thing you need to understand is that your happiness matters a lot. Contemplating leaving a long-term relationship is the right thing, and you can do this by asking some questions to yourself.
Here are a few questions you can ask yourself before contemplating leaving a long term relationship:
If someone told you that you should leave this relationship, would you feel relieved?
Sometimes you have decided subconsciously what you should do, but you can’t say it out loud. Because somehow you think it will hurt your partner. But if someone tells you what to do, it would be easier for you to decide whether you want to do what they are saying or not. If you feel relieved if you ask yourself the above question, it means the relationship is already dead, and you should leave it.
Are your needs fulfilled without too much trouble?
If it is very difficult for you to meet your even basic needs to be met in this relationship, there is more harm than good in this relationship. You have been in a relationship for a long time now, and you should make things easier for each other. If it is not happening, it is time to break up.
Are you sexually attracted to your partner in a unique way?
People say that personality matters and is the main factor, which is clearly wrong. Physical intimacy is also a very important factor. If you feel like there is no spark anymore between you two, it could be a signal that you should end this relationship.
Is your partner’s behavior intolerable?
At the start of a relationship, you do not give things much thought. The relationship is new, and you two are just enjoying it. You know each other with time, and that’s when some annoying habits hit you hard. If your partner’s behavior is intolerable and he is not willing to change it, maybe you should end it now.
Is forgiveness capacity in your relationship demonstrated?
There is nothing like perfect in this universe. We have to struggle for what we care about. If you two sometimes get in a fight, it is okay and normal. But if there is no forgiveness capacity, resentments will start building up in the relationship and eventually replace love. At that point, there is only one thing left to do, breakup.
Leaving a long term toxic relationship
Long-term relationships are best in a way that you can share your life with the person you love most in this whole world. Your lives are blended, and you enjoy this togetherness to the fullest. But a long-term toxic relationship is something else. You have to deal with heartbreak every other day; still, you do not want to end this misery. It is because you love the person and cannot imagine your life without them. But leaving a long-term abusive relationship is necessary because it affects you mentally and physically.
Leaving a long-term abusive relationship can be tough, but it is the best thing you can do for yourself. If you are wondering how you can end a toxic relationship, here are some tips for you:
Your self-esteem is all you need
You must be aware of the fact that low self-esteem is a key factor in a toxic relationship. Toxic partner utilizes it as a weapon to get what they want. And the other person starts feeling like they are not good enough and is lucky to have someone in their life at all. Deep down, you understand that it cannot be true. So build up yourself. Think about your good qualities, understand that you do not need anybody to feel complete or happy. You are such a remarkable person you can attract a better person.
Quit making excuses
First of all, you need to quit rationalizing for actions of your partner, for why you must remain in this relationship, for why you should not leave, etc., etc. The second you stop doing this, the second you will be able to see this relationship logically. At that point, you will understand why leaving a long-term toxic relationship has become necessary for you. Furthermore, you will realize that you also do not want to be a part of this toxicity. You deserve better you must walk away.
Make a choice
When you can see that this relationship is absolutely hopeless, it’s an ideal opportunity to take action. It is your choice so take full responsibility for it. Figure out what you are looking for in a partner, and what you want from your life. If you are sure that this relationship is not going to give you what you want deciding a date to end it has to be done.
Talk to your partner.
Alright, so you’ve been dealing with these emotions yourself and have chosen to leave. This is the ideal opportunity to tell your partner. Choose a private spot to talk to your partner and instead of engaging in long talks, come straight to the point and share your decision. At that point, get ready to remain quiet if the reaction is outrageous or manipulative. Yes, it will be hard; however, obviously and inevitably it is for the best.
Set healthy boundaries
If you do not want to ruin this progress you have made, it is necessary to set healthy boundaries. You have talked to them about your decision and why you feel this way. Now the conversation is over if you live together, decide who is going to find a new place, and who will live here. Till then, move to a friend or family member’s place for a while. Do not contact them via call or text, or social media. Completely cut them off from your life; it is the only solution for leaving a long-term toxic relationship and moving on.
Be ready to deal with heartbreak.
There’s a decent possibility that you will move on from this happily and start your new life. But there is also a huge possibility that you will be heartbroken for weeks or even for months. Be prepared for this, and don’t allow it to hinder your progress. You are not doing anything wrong, and you will get over it for sure. Give yourself time and let yourself feel every emotion, sadness, heart and feeling. This will be over soon, and you will feel better.
Take care of yourself
Assuming your relationship was abusive and toxic, there are huge chances that you did not take care of yourself through all these years. So now you have an ideal opportunity to fix all that harm. Get out of the house, go for a walk, do exercise, go for a massage, and pamper yourself. You deserve this. It will not be easy, but you have to try at least as you may have heard of the popular quote ‘fake it until you make it.
Leaving a good long term relationship
Even though leaving a toxic relationship is not easy; how can someone think of leaving a good long-term relationship? There can be several underlying issues, like intimacy issues, a person may have fallen out of love, or several other reasons. But having children or some investments makes everything all the more complicated.
If you are thinking of leaving a good long term relationship, here are some tips for you:
Be clear about what you want to say.
You might have many things in your mind, but right now, when you want to end your relationship, you must have a clear mind. You need to be direct with your words. Saying something complicated will give a vague message to your partner, and your partner may not get what you want.
Answer wisely to their questions
They will ask you certain questions, like why you want to do this, where is this going, how will everything work? You need to prepare yourself for this answer ahead. It is because in their mind it is a perfect relationship and you are the one who is not satisfied, so it will be a bit difficult for them.
Do not give false hopes.
This whole breaking up thing is not easy for them; it will be difficult for you too. They believed that their relationship was strong, but it is falling apart, and they will react emotionally. Because of their reaction, you might want to give your relationship another chance, but actually, you will not feel well if you do so. Therefore instead of giving those false hopes, stick to the plan. Give them some time to accept the fact and deal with it, and then talk about the legal matters or necessary detachment arrangements.
Leaving a long term relationship for someone else
If you are leaving a long-term relationship for someone else, It can be even more emotionally hurtful for you. Although it is not your fault we do not choose who we love, it can still hurt them badly. So if you are leaving a long-term relationship for someone else, think about it thoroughly. If the previous relationship was just crap and toxic, it is good that you are leaving it and taking an interest in someone else, but if it was good, you might need to think deeply about it and show empathy to your hurt partner.
Leaving a long term relationship Reddit
If you are thinking about leaving your long-term relationship, you might have many questions in your mind. For instance, does it worth leaving your partner? Will you be happy after doing so? You are so confused right now that you want to hear it from someone who has been through this and can understand your situation. A lot of people go for leaving a long-term relationship Reddit suggestions. Don’t worry, I have shortlisted some of the best answers on Reddit to the question, “how long does it take to move on from a long-term relationship, and how can one do it?”
Here are leaving a long term relationship Reddit suggestions:
“It takes about a year, in my opinion, to be able to truly move forward. Basically, what you have to do is find ways to distract yourself while building confidence.
- Join a gym
- Find a new hobby
- Learn a new skill
- Take a class
- Work more than you normally would
- These are all things to distract you
It is also good to go on a date when you are ready. This is to let yourself know you are still desirable. After getting out of a long-term relationship, you might not be so sure. Going on a date helps soothe those creases. Try not to bug your mates too much about it. I would say have one night with a good mate where you go and get drunk and whine all about it to him. And let him know beforehand this is what you’re doing, of course. Then after that, fucking try to let it go. Dwelling on it does no good for you or your psyche. Also, you are going to need to re-enter the friend group that you likely ditched out on when you go the SO.”
“18-year relationship, walked away because I knew my wife had fallen out of love with me and would never admit there was someone else; I took the high road and just separated and divorced. Dont let yourself be alone, fill your time with everything, hobbies, go out with friends, gym, videogames online, always be social, it takes time, but soon you realize that you are happy again.”
“I think it takes about half the length of a relationship to be truly over it. I had an 8-year relationship ended, and it’s been 4 years, and I’m honestly over it. I’m a whole different person, and I look back in fondness rather than sadness now. I think it helps that I’m massively more successful in every aspect of my life now, and I can see if we’d have stayed together, I wouldn’t have had the catalyst for change. She does email me every now and then, but I’ve pretty much decided I don’t want to see her again. My reason is I always feel bad when I see her as I think she’s wasting her talents. With that said, I keep in touch with her parents, and I’m popping over for a coffee next week to see them.”
“After my divorce(we were together for six, married for 3), I got three jobs in three different cities to get by financially, couch surfed, drank a lot, made new friends and had many fun NSA relationships, got three tattoos, got about 11 piercings, found places to do stand up, which subsequently led to more fun one night stands and free drinks, dyed my hair fire engine red(my husband was red colorblind, so I couldn’t really dye it red as I wanted to during our relationship), and picked up smoking again. So yeah, I would maybe recommend the workout/find a hobby/friends route as a healthier option. It probably would’ve been better. But alas, the question is, what did you do? not what would you do?.”
Leaving a long term relationship for someone else Reddit
Leaving a long-term relationship for another person can be confusing. You don’t know if you are doing the right thing, ending a perfect relationship or not. If you are looking to leave a long-term relationship for someone else Reddit suggestions, you are at the right place.
I have shortlisted some of the best answers by Reddit users in response to the question “Does leave a long-term relationship for another person work or not?”
Here is what they have to say:
“It can if you are sure of your feelings for the new person and you are sure about how you feel. I wasn’t in a “relationship” when I met my current boyfriend, but I was talking to/casually dating a guy I liked. But when I met my current boyfriend, something between us just clicked, and things with the first guy just weren’t the same from there.”
“I did, and I’m still not sure if it was a good idea. I was in a stable, open relationship with a friend. It was awesome…. but. I met a guy who was super into me and wanted to try and have a relationship. There’s a lot of pressure, and I constantly seem to be doing the wrong thing.”
“If you’re certain that the relationship that you’re in isn’t going where you want it to, or you aren’t happy within it, then it is always a good idea to leave the relationship, regardless of whether or not there is someone else to begin a new one. Although, if you’re leaving a happy relationship that you are slightly bored with to maybe experience something new, it likely won’t be a good idea, and I don’t see it being successful. I left my abusive ex for my current husband; however, we had known each other for years and waited for 6 months or so (I think) before officially dating/being sure that I wanted to be with him and vice versa.”
Here are answers I liked most about Leaving a long term relationship for someone else Reddit:
“It depends on your reasons for leaving. If you were perfectly happy until you met the new person, then chances are slim. It may be a matter of just wanting something new and exciting again, or the grass is always greener. However, if the relationship was already in trouble and you wanted out, then yes, it may. Source: Experience with my current relationship. (Although I didn’t really leave the last one for this one, I kept putting off the breakup until I met my current SO, then I pulled my finger out and ended it immediately).”
“Worked out for me. Left a relationship that I was unhappy and insecure in for my current boyfriend. We are now moved in together with a child on the way. It all happened really fast, but we are happy with how it all turned out, in my case happier than I’ve ever been. It really depends on the person you’re thinking about being with. Is this person planning on sticking around, or are they going to get bored after the initial excitement runs out? It’s not a decision to make on a whim.”
Relationships are complicated. At the start, everything is so exciting, and you are so much in love with your partner that you can’t imagine bad things. But when the relationship becomes older, it feels like that spark is gone. That is the point when you have to struggle and keep your relationship lively. But that does not mean if your partner is toxic or abusive, you should not think about Leaving a long-term relationship. If you feel like it is not working, instead of staying and hurting each other, it would be better to leave.
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