I Don’t Get The Kind Of Guys I Like | M.D.D Dating Coach, Couples Therapy, Breakup Counselling, Personal development Consultancy

Table of Contents hide

1 I Don’t Get the Kind of Guys I Like — Why It Keeps Happening and How to Change It

2 1. Unrealistic Expectations — Your Standards Might Need a Reality Check

3 2. You Act Differently Around Men You Really Like

4 3. You May Need to Refresh How You Present Yourself

5 4. Stop Chasing “Your Type” — Start Recognising What You Actually Need

6 5. Patience and Self‑Awareness Are Key

7 6. Real Love Requires Balance, Not Perfection

8 Final Thoughts — Don’t Settle, But Don’t Sabotage Either

9 Further reading

I Don’t Get the Kind of Guys I Like — Why It Keeps Happening and How to Change It

How many times have you said, “I just don’t get the kind of guys I like”?
You meet men who adore you — but you’re not into them. Then, the ones who make your heart race either ignore you, string you along, or don’t want anything serious.

It’s one of the oldest dating paradoxes out there. The men you want don’t choose you, and the men who choose you aren’t your type. It feels unfair, confusing, and sometimes deeply frustrating.

So, why does this keep happening? Let’s break it down and look at what might be blocking you from attracting the kind of love you truly deserve.

1. Unrealistic Expectations — Your Standards Might Need a Reality Check

It’s great to have standards. You deserve to want a loving, stable, ambitious partner. But sometimes, women create a list of requirements that even they wouldn’t qualify for if roles were reversed.

If your dating checklist sounds like:

“He must have a great job, own a car, dress well, be tall, funny, romantic, financially secure, spontaneous, smart, great with kids, AND emotionally mature,”
take a moment to pause.

Ask yourself:

Am I offering the same level of effort, stability, and self‑growth that I expect?
Am I focusing on values that truly matter — or things that simply sound impressive?

Perfection doesn’t exist. Real love comes from connection, not credentials. The healthiest relationships come from compatibility and emotional reciprocity, not an impossible ideal.

2. You Act Differently Around Men You Really Like

This is one of the biggest reasons women struggle to attract the kind of men they want.
Think about it — when a man doesn’t excite you, you’re calm, witty, and unbothered. You don’t overthink your texts. You’re your authentic self.

But when you meet someone you really want, you start to overanalyze everything:

“Should I text back?”
“Did I say too much?”
“Does he like me?”
Suddenly, your relaxed vibe vanishes, and you start acting nervous or overly available.

That change in energy pushes many men away — not because they don’t like you, but because desperation kills attraction.
When you chase validation, you send the message that he’s the prize instead of seeing yourself as equal value.

Here’s the secret: Behave around the men you like exactly how you behave around the ones you don’t.
Confidence, a bit of mystery, and emotional self‑control are incredibly attractive — especially to high‑value men.

3. You May Need to Refresh How You Present Yourself

This isn’t about becoming someone you’re not. It’s about showing your best self in a world built on first impressions.
Men are visual creatures — not superficial, just wired that way. Attraction is largely physical at first, and then emotional once they connect with you more deeply.

That means investing a little time in self‑care can seriously change your dating experience:

Keep your hair healthy and styled in a way that makes you feel confident.
Dress in a way that expresses your personality while flattering your figure.
Eat well, move your body, take care of your nails and skin.

When you look good, you feel good — and confidence radiates. No one needs perfection, but effort is magnetic.

If your goal is to attract driven, confident, mature men, reflect that energy in your own lifestyle.
Love what you see in the mirror before expecting others to.

4. Stop Chasing “Your Type” — Start Recognising What You Actually Need

Sometimes, “your type” is the very thing that’s holding you back.
If your usual attraction pattern leads to players, emotionally unavailable men, or people who don’t commit, it’s time to ask — why am I drawn to this kind of dynamic?

You may be addicted to the adrenaline of uncertainty, confusing emotional intensity with chemistry. But calm, genuine connection feels different — and sometimes that’s what real love looks like.

Try expanding your vision of what “your type” means. Look beyond charisma and physical traits. Focus on consistency, communication, and how someone makes you feel long‑term, not just how passionate things seem short‑term.

Many women discover that the guy who wasn’t their “type” at first becomes the love who changes everything.

5. Patience and Self‑Awareness Are Key

Modern dating can wear you out fast — endless swipes, short attention spans, and emotional games.
But remember: you’re not behind. Love happens when you’re grounded enough to attract it.

Give yourself permission to grow instead of rushing to find someone.
Take this time to work on your mindset, confidence, and communication skills — all of which shape who you attract.

If frustration, insecurities, or patterns feel too repetitive, professional guidance can help.
A few sessions with a relationship expert from Miss Date Doctor can help you:

Understand your dating patterns.
Rebuild confidence after rejection.
Learn how to attract men aligned with your values.

It’s not about changing who you are — it’s about aligning with what truly fulfils you.

6. Real Love Requires Balance, Not Perfection

You want someone who excites you and makes you feel safe, someone you can laugh with and grow beside. That combination does exist — but it takes time, patience, and emotional awareness.

Be realistic, open‑minded, and kind to yourself during the process. Mr. Right might not check every box, but he’ll check the ones that matter most.

And when you finally stop trying to control where love comes from, that’s exactly when it shows up.

Final Thoughts — Don’t Settle, But Don’t Sabotage Either

If you’re thinking, “I don’t get the kind of guys I like,” remember — love isn’t about winning a selective lottery. It’s about energy.
When your energy says “I need to be chosen,” you chase.
When your energy says “I am the prize,” you attract.

Raise your confidence, refine your boundaries, and become the woman your ideal man would naturally pursue.

You don’t need to force love — your energy will do the attracting once you believe in your worth.

Be patient, stay authentic, and trust that the right man — your real match — is simply stuck in traffic on his way to you. ❤️

**#ConfidentDating #AttractTheRightMan #MissDateDoctor