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Narcissist discard and silent treatment

Narcissist discard and silent treatment

Narcissist discard and silent treatment feel emotionally exhausting. It also makes you feel that you are worthless, and you will feel like you are losing your mind slowly. So what to do when you have been a victim of narcissist discard and silent treatment? Most experts will suggest you follow the no contact rule. But we are not living in an ideal world sometimes there is no choice because the individual is unavoidable, but when you have to deal with a narcissist what will you do then?

In this article, I will talk about narcissist discard and silent treatment, why do they behave this way, what are some signs and how you can handle this horrible situation. So let’s dig a little deeper:

Narcissist discard

Discarding means throwing something away that is not useful anymore. A narcissist will objectify people. It means they see people as objects that are needed to be discarded when they are of no use anymore. You are not a sovereign being to them. For them, you are just an interchangeable object that can serve their needs. They will groom you the way they want, use you and will then discard you. They are cruel at discarding someone. This is what we call narcissist discard. It is a very painful experience and can lead to depression and lingering emotional trauma.

Covert narcissist discard

The Covert narcissist seems to be so self-centred and self-focused that they have no connection with reality. It seems like they do not care about others and try to manipulate them for what they want. One thing about covert narcissism is that it shows fewer signs of classic narcissistic personality disorder. They may show characteristics that are usually not associated with narcissism, like shyness, sensitivity to others’ thinking, and humility. There true devious character is hidden.

Covert narcissist discard is just like a regular narcissistic discard, but the point is you cannot recognize the pattern. Covert narcissist are hard to spot; they are not expressive, so you can’t identify them easily. Covert narcissistic discard is just like that, but try to read the signs I know it is not going to be easy for you but if you want the best for yourself you need to try at least. They can trick you into feeling everything is fine and then suddenly dump you out of nowhere. I will share some signs about how you can identify a narcissist discard pattern in the next section.

Narcissist discard stage

You are familiar with what it means now  by the term narcissistic discard, but is it a stage that has to come? Is narcissistic discard stage  the destination of every relationship with a narcissist? Well if you ask me it is true these people never have good intentions. Every relationship with a narcissist ends with a narcissistic discard stage where he feels that the person is not fun anymore or can’t fulfil his needs, so the gets rid and dumps you. Unless the other person recognizes the toxic pattern and decides to leave the narcissist first.

Mid-range narcissist discard

What does it mean by mid-range narcissist discard? In my opinion, this type of discard is not that cruel compared to the regular one. Although making you feel worthless is the worst thing one can do, but still, it is not as bad as the way a regular or extreme narcissist will deal with you. It is because a mid-range narcissist is aware that this is causing you to hurt, he may not take responsibility for it, but they may try to make things less worse and comfort you. This individual will not display the malign nature of the more severe evil narcissist. This individual can change depending on if the individual decides to they waver in the middle of good and evil.

Narcissist discard divorce

The ultimate fate of marriage with a narcissist is narcissist discard divorce. But it is not your fault that is how they behave. They realize that marrying was just a mistake; they will say things like “you are not the person I thought you would be” or “I wanted a perfect partner and you are not”. Well, perfection does not exist, we all are human, and we all are flawed, but we are worthy of happiness and love. Unfortunately, a narcissist never understands this, the narcissist always gets what they want, and if their spouse is not capable of doing what they want, marriage reaches narcissist discard divorce stage.

Narcissist discard signs

After falling in love with a narcissist, it feels like your long waited fairy tale has come true. Everything seems perfect, and a narcissist makes sure that you feel special. He will make you feel like you are his only destination. But you don’t know that you have fallen for a narcissist and when you do realize it is too late. You either have fallen hard or are just married to them, which is not easy to break. You may start noticing red flags, but everything is just confusing. If you are kind of person who likes to please others, you might question yourself before you think wrong of your partner.

No matter where you are in a relationship, some signs indicate your partner is showing his/her true colours. You need to understand that your partner is not changing, you did not do anything wrong to upset them, but your partner is like this your partner is a narcissist. Your partner is showing their true nature. They are actually a skilled chameleon changing colours whenever they need to do so. But the point is they can’t camouflage for a very longer time, so they need a new supply, new people to discard old ones to destroy and laugh at. Here are some narcissist discard signs that indicate your narcissist is going to find the next round of supply:

Hovering transforms into negotiating.

You have been told that you are appealing, smart and fun, and your bold nature was a huge turn-on, however, now your narcissist considers you to be the opposite. Your intelligence seems opininionated; your beauty is marked as overzealous, and your humour is not funny anymore but vulgar. The exceptionally superb qualities they once cherished about you are presently the “reason” for the relationship’s destruction, and they help you to remember it day by day you are not good enough they claim the narcissist is coming out.

Your success has become a danger to them.

Maybe you’ve succeeded in the project you’ve been looking for or have been promoted, however rather than receiving appreciation from your partner you’re accused of being busy all the time for work or looking for attention. All of your achievements are considered dangers to your partner’s very presence since they realize they cannot keep up with you. You likewise undermine their spotlight of accepting any approval and praise from others, so you will be informed that your victories aren’t excessively incredible, so zip it.

They are charming at the office and miserable at home.

Everyone loves them at the office or other gatherings and thinks you are so fortunate to be hitched to such an enchanting, charming individual. However, when your partner gets back home, you have to face irritability, rage, disorder, liquor addiction, disengagement, and a reluctance to involve in family activities. This routine happens because it is depleting for them to maintain a false personality for 8 hours at work and when they reach home they resent you or your family for reminding them of all the inabilities they believe they possess.

Your approval or praise for them does not matter anymore.

It is one of the most clear narcissist discard signs. You were the only individual whose assessment genuinely made a difference; however, it goes unnoticed if you compliment them. Now, if your narcissist is appalled by you, your commendations are considered as desperate and needy. They now go somewhere else to look for endorsement from those they appreciate, and who haven’t got on to their narcissistic ways. They will jump from one person to another this way.

Their sympathy transforms into apathy.

Your sickness or a terrible day at the workplace wasonce sympathized with chicken soup or a bundle of roses. But now no matter how hard your day was they tell you their day was more miserable than you. Also, as you put in more effort and try harder to get an ounce of sympathy, you only have to face apathy. Furthermore, this is most likely the hardest thing about being in love with a narcissist – on the grounds that when your feelings go neglected, you keep on pursuing them which places your confidence in extreme risk. When your confidence is gone, you risk remaining with your narcissist for the long haul, since you don’t figure you can do any better.

The worst thing about falling in love with a narcissist is that the qualities attract you to them are the ones they resent a lot. It is because they know you are a great person and they can’t match you.

What’s more, since you are the one nearest to them, you become the one who is “onto them,” and start questioning their conduct. A narcissist’s biggest dread is being uncovered that they are not special anymore. So being their partner, you are abandoned, abused, traumatized and ultimately discarded.

They will give you the silent treatment.

It is one of the main tactics used by a narcissist. You know the individual is doing wrong, this person is hurting you, and you are clueless. You don’t know what to do so you try talking to them but what do you get? The silent treatment. The narcissist will try to avoid you and will not respond to your messages or calls. It makes them feel powerful. In their way, they are manipulating you and trying to control you. This is the worst thing someone can do with their partner whenever you notice this toxicity make sure to leave the person immediately.

Why does a narcissist discard you?

A question arises why does a narcissist discard you? The first reason is that the narcissist thinks they do not need you anymore and whatever they wanted from you, they already got. But it can also because of your behaviour. One day when you realize that the behaviour is toxic and you do not want to take it anymore, you have become their worst enemy.

A narcissist would never accept a person who knows how to recognize manipulation and abuse. You called out their toxic behaviour. They liked it when you were not responsive and were not able to recognize their toxic behaviour. But now you are aware of their tactics and trying to make them understand you cannot handle this you are the enemy.

Why does a narcissist discard you? You are trying to set boundaries or give them a silent treatment and they are not used to this. You are not interesting to them anymore and just a boring person who is now useless to them.

Does a narcissist discard for good?

Does a narcissist discard for good? Initially, you may think that it is cruel. You loved that person, so it is heart-wrenching. You invested your time and energy and love, but the narcissist just treated you a like a mere object in response. But believe me, it is for the best. A narcissist will never change their ways because the narcissist thinks that there is nothing wrong with their behaviour, and if you keep living under this influence, you will lose your self-esteem.

Does a narcissist discard for good? The narcissist may think that getting rid of you is doing well and teaching you a lesson, but actually, it is good for you. They may come back in some cases but only for more manipulation and suffering  You are going to get rid of a toxic person walk away when they discard never go back.

Recovering from narcissist discard

Being discarded by the person you love is the worst feeling ever. It is such an exhausting experience because it involves dealing with rejection, abandonment, betrayal, and replacement. It feels even more painful because the person knows you well and wants to throw you away by choice. The narcissist is telling you that you are unacceptable, and this personal rejection makes everything even worse.

This leads to a feeling of worthlessness and also causes emotional trauma to the attachment system. This can lead to relationship fears and commitment ears in future. Suppose you have been discarded by the person you were in an intimidate relationship with. In that case, you will be deeply wounded because you allowed yourself to trust the person; you chose to be vulnerable around them. But let me assure you one thing recovering from narcissist discard is possible. Although it is not easy and you have to invest your energy and time, you can still do this. If you are wondering how to recover from narcissist discard and silent treatment here are some tips for you:

Take some time to grieve.

Do not try to ignore your emotions and try to accept them. The more you permit yourself to feel these emotions, the faster you will heal. Grieving is the way towards communicating your emotions that you are trying to hide. Talk about your loss and feelings surrounding this loss. Recall all good and bad memories, write down your emotions in the form of a letter and seek closure.

Challenge your negative thoughts

While grieving you are spending time with yourself, you are in shock and also while in  denial you question yourself, “why did it happen?” or “where was I wrong”. You will doubtlessly be trusting that your lost love will return. But actually, the narcissist will never return unless the narcissist needs something from you. A narcissist has treated you so badly that you feel worthless now and think that you are not good enough for anyone. You have presumably been urged to accept that you are the issue and you were never fully ready to take care of the relationship. You have all these negative thoughts that are not true, but you have been treated so badly that you believe them. You need to understand that it will only cause you harm and will not give you any benefit. You need to understand that you are not a problem. You need to remind yourself that you are a good person who deserves to be loved. You have to believe that you can recover yourself from this trauma and can have a delightful future.

Do not take responsibility of things you have not done.

Being in a relationship with a toxic person, makes you think everything bad that happened in a relationship was your fault. But actually, it was not your fault. The narcissist will blame you for everything. If someone uses you to get their way, it tells you a lot about them not about you. So there is no need to take responsibility of things you have not done. Realize that it is an opportunity for you to get rid of a toxic and poor relationship.

Learn a lesson from your experiences

Just because your narcissist partner chose to discard, this does not mean you are not capable of being in a romantic and loving relationship. You need to consider this as a valuable experience. Ask some questions to yourself like:

  • What did you learn from this relationship that you can use to make your next relationship better?
  • What could have you done to make this relationship better? It is not about blaming yourself but for personal growth. Maybe you should have left that person once you realized that this individual was toxic.
  • Am I ready to start a new relationship and be vulnerable around them?

Seek help from a professional

Dealing with a narcissist is stressful and needs patience. You obviously love them, that’s why you tried to make everything work, but what did you get in response? Only rejection and trauma. Your mental health is more important than anything. So you need to seek help from a professional as it will not be easy for you to deal with the whole trauma on your own. A professional mental health care provider can assess the whole situation and suggest the best solution. Do not rush things and take everything slowly. A professional may suggest you embark on some meditation techniques and also therapy.

Changing lifestyle habits

Therapy and even medication is not that effective against narcissism if you are not ready to change yourself. If you are in denial and think that there is no problem you won’t be able to deal with it. It means you are not even that interested in therapy; you are doing this just for peer pressure. There is a need to bring a positive change in your life, and it is only possible if you change your lifestyle habits. Try eating healthy food, prefer morning walk etc. You doctor will also recommend some relaxation exercises to improve your mood and make you feel relaxed. The frustration and anger you feel will be lower with the help of these healthy practices. It will make recovering from narcissist discard easy.

THE BEST REVENGE AGAINST A NARCISSIST IS LIVING WELL DO NOT LET HEM WIN

Maybe you truly love this person and want to make the relationship work. Or maybe you’re married with children and don’t want to break up the family. That’s a tough situation and I can’t honestly say you will have success but author Laura Doyle offers an interesting approach when you’re in a relationship with a narcissist. Pretend he’s not a narcissist. You read that correctly. She recommends you treat him the way you did at the beginning of your relationship, when you first were falling in love. This means ignoring his toxic behavior and focusing on the things you admire about him. This prevents the narcissist from feeling embarrassed or attacked, and allows them to continue along without having their ego hurt.

How do you do this exactly? Laura mentions research bias, meaning “if your bias is that he’s going to be a cold, self-centered jerk, then guess what you’re going to experience more? If your bias is that he’s a loving, thoughtful, giving husband, then guess what you’re going to experience more?” Changing how you treat him will result in him responding differently to you. If he doesn’t feel attacked, then maybe he won’t attack back.

Conclusion

A study was conducted back in 2015 in which it was reported that most people move on in their life three months of their breakup. However, according to the research reports of the 2017 study, it was found that most people take 18 months to get back to their life after they end a romantic relationship. In the case of a toxic relationship, it can take a long time as you are not only dealing with the breakup but the trauma of a toxic relationship.

Narcissist discard and silent treatment can ruin your future relationships too. But if you are willing to make your life better, you can move on from this. I have tried my best to share useful information about narcissist discard and silent treatment, BOOK A SESSION WITH A THERAPIST NOW.

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment?

Being in a romantic relationship with a narcissist can have unpleasant emotional consequences on an individual. Narcissist are known to be very toxic, and it is very hard to cope up with them in a relationship. Which is why when you decide to separate from them, it might feel liberating.

This article will talk about Do narcissists come back after silent treatment? Let’s have a look and see some of the concerns that may develop, according to the experts:

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment?

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment? It is possible that a narcissist may grow agitated and will try even harder to get your attention after you give them silent treatment – particularly in ways that are toxic or violent – if you ignore them and deny them their source. Since they have fragile egos, ignoring a narcissist will make them even more enraged. They’ll be embarrassed and strike out at you to preserve their interests.

Many women are drawn to narcissists because of their excellent looks and the appearance of power or the riches they project. If a narcissist is after you and you reject him, he will pursue you even more aggressively because you become a challenge for them. For a narcissist, the “chase” is all about the pursuit and eventually winning you over, although all men do feel some exhilaration in this “chase” (since males have twenty times more androgen than women).

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment? Yes, they do, and with more resilience. Let’s look at some after-effects of ignoring a selfish person:

A narcissist will go to great lengths to get your attention

This is simple: narcissists cannot stand the thought of failing badly. And the thought of failing bruises their egos too much! We want all ladies to be on the lookout since narcissists may be difficult to resist, at least in the first stages. In the beginning, they’ll try to entice you with enticing presents and promises, but after they’ve gotten what they want (in this case, you), all of it disappears.

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment? If your spouse is genuinely narcissistic, you’ll be surprised at how cold and uninterested they are when you attempt to speak about your problems with them. Getting involved with a pathological narcissist would almost certainly lead to heartache due to his lack of empathy and an excessive sense of entitlement.

Narcissism is characterized by a lack of empathy for the sentiments of others around oneself. To that end, narcissistic individuals may anger and fiercely retaliate in the face of criticism or rejection. Like most arrogant people, narcissists refuse to accept responsibility for their actions because they refuse to confess their mistakes.

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment? If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist and attempt to end it by ignoring him, be prepared to receive his scathing text messages of rage and retaliation. Alternatively, he may completely prevent you from communicating with him. A narcissist doesn’t care about your sentiments and won’t attempt to find out why you’re not reaching out to them, unlike their “normal” counterparts. For him, he’s the only one who matters.

A narcissist will become more agitated.

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment? Yes, because narcissists have fragile egos, this is why (also though they seem quite large because they are overcompensating). They’ll strike out at you because they’ll feel embarrassed. Because they cannot perceive the needs of others or care whether or not they exhaust another person, true narcissists are indifferent to the well-being of others.

This, however, might be harmful to the narcissist’s victim. Going complete no contact is the greatest way to start separating yourself from a narcissist. No phone calls, emails, messages, or in-person meetings, please. On the other hand, a true narcissist will not alter despite this. They’ll keep looking till they discover something else. However, you will be able to leave.

They may defame you or fling insults your way.

Breaking up with a narcissist is the only option for those in a relationship with one. The most efficient technique to break connections with a narcissist is to ignore them. However, it isn’t easy to do. The narcissist will act out when they sense their host is rejecting them and will make great efforts to draw the victim back in.

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment? Yes, remember that you are the source of their power, they will do anything to make themselves feel better, and that is mostly by degrading you. The most effective way of ignoring them is not to respond to any of these methods.

  • What happens when you give a narcissist the silent treatment?
  • To reaffirm their authority, they may choose to ignore you back.
  • Depending on the situation, they may insult you, degrade you, or harm your reputation.
  • They might get aggressive or dangerous. They may stalk you.
  • To get your attention back, they may start crying and talking sweetly.
  • They may use guilt as a tool to influence your behavior.
  • They could even say they’re going to kill themselves.

The narcissist will try to lure you into participating in whatever manner, but you must have the will to refuse them. Disengaging from someone with Narcissistic disorder requires you to ignore them until they leave on their own while focusing on your recovery.

They may try to influence your decisions.

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment? Yes, they will make promises, opt for sweet-talking, and saying how much they miss you are some ways to get your attention. Sweet-talking failed; they next shift into a state of “Narcissistic Fury,” when they use all means necessary to get you to participate.

A narcissist enjoys any interaction, whether negatively or positively. Eventually, the rage will decrease if you stay firm and avoid making eye contact with the other person.

Narcissistic Breakdown occurs when an individual runs out of narcissistic supplies and enters an acute condition of physical abstinence, similar to that experienced by someone detoxing from strong narcotics.

Conclusion

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment? The narcissist’s fury is typically expressed via phone calls, voicemails, texts, and emails after losing power over you due to no communication.

If such methods fail, the narcissist may visit your house or office or contact relatives or friends to reclaim power over you. Even though they’ve moved on, they need you to help replenish their spirit.

Do narcissists come back after silent treatment? If they can get in touch with you, they will employ romance and other tricks to make you forget how awful the abuse had gotten and how you had left.

Sadly, this period does not last long as they struggle to keep their mask on. Remember that they may not return tomorrow, but they will most certainly return in a year or two.

Further reading

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