Table of Contents hide

1.2 How do you deal with emotional loneliness?

1.3 What are the three types of loneliness?

1.4 Emotionally lonely in a relationship

1.5 Emotional loneliness examples

1.6 Chronic loneliness

1.7 Loneliness symptoms

1.8 How to cure loneliness?

1.9 Loneliness psychology

1.10 Types of loneliness

1.10.1 Emotionally Lonely Conclusion

1.11 Further reading

Emotionally lonely

Emotionally Lonely. Just as with some other sort of loneliness, emotional loneliness can be brought about by various conditions. Probably the most well-known triggers include:

Parental disregard in adolescence
Trauma in adolescence or adulthood
Substance misuse
Circumstances that make an individual be viewed as different or as an outcast

Emotional loneliness stands separated from different kinds of loneliness and it isn’t equivalent to emotional isolation.

Being emotionally Lonely can stem from a wide range of conditions that might start in adolescence or adulthood.

Emotional loneliness is perplexing and can appear in an assortment of ways relying upon its objective; along these lines, there isn’t one single method for alleviating it.

Childhood Neglect Or Trauma:

A few theories suggest that individuals are bound to battle with making close emotional bonds as grown-ups on the off chance that they didn’t have such connections with a parent or parent-like figure as babies or youngsters.

In any case, an injury that happens during adolescence or adulthood can likewise make it challenging for people to lay out quality associations with others, which might add to sensations of enthusiastic forlornness.

Individuals who are recuperating from traumatic experiences might be bound to encounter constant emotional loneliness, too.

Sharing the traumatic experiences with other people, however significant and recuperating for some, can be unimaginably troublesome – and being not able to do so may exacerbate things.

In cases, for example, this, the best game-plan for casualties of trauma who are battling with passionate dejection is to look for help from a certified proficient.

Substance Abuse:

Research has discovered that the individuals who misuse drugs are bound to feel sincerely desolate, despite the fact that it is questionable whether the substance addiction creates depression – or causes it.

In any case, relapses in drug use are frequently impacted by it.

One review from the Stellenbosch University in South Africa discovered that sensations of depression added to backslide in 76% of youngsters and 67% percent of young ladies continuing in-patient substance addiction treatment.

Individuals who are emotionally lonely, and connected with drug use will observe the most competent assistance in the possession of prepared experts and offices intended to treat enslavement.

Situational Life Changes:

In different examples, an individual could foster transient enthusiastic forlornness when a relationship starts to separate or finishes separate, while migrating to another city, evolving position, or confronting other massive changes in their lives.

During such temporary conditions, depression will ordinarily determine with time as an individual adjusts to these progressions

What is emotional loneliness?

What is emotional loneliness? As many of us will know, we don’t need to be physically alone to feel lonely. A toxic friendship or relationship can be incredibly isolating, for example, spending too much time with people we don’t feel close to can have damaging effects on our psyche, even if we’re only interacting with them through our phones.

What is emotional loneliness? Loneliness affects people in different ways, and for this reason, there are four distinct types of loneliness identified by psychologists: emotional, social, situational, and chronic.

Emotional loneliness

Those who are emotionally lonely will find it difficult to improve things without tackling the root of the problem. Emotional loneliness is not circumstantial but, rather, comes from within.

Therapy can help tackle the root cause of these feelings of emotional loneliness. Working with a therapist, possibly with a technique such as behavioural cognitive therapy, or attending group therapy, is likely to lead to the best possible outcome.

The person in question can start to understand why they are emotionally lonely, how their background and experiences have contributed to behaviours that make things worse, and how they can develop a new, and more useful, set of behaviours.

Situational loneliness

Many millennials choose to work abroad for a few years in their 20s and 30s, and the rise in solo travel means a great number of us are planning to jet off on solo adventures once the coronavirus pandemic has passed.

While these plans are undoubtedly exciting, they can also be a period of adjustment as we try to make new friends while simultaneously getting to grips with a new culture and way of life – potentially leading to situational loneliness.

Situational loneliness can result from being in circumstances that make developing friendships difficult.

Examples include those living abroad, perhaps in a place where they do not speak the language perfectly, stay-at-home mothers (or fathers) with young children, or those with a physical or intellectual disability that makes it difficult to get out and about.”

Social loneliness

Social loneliness is typically experienced by those who have problems in social situations because of shyness, social awkwardness, or a sense of low self-esteem that makes them doubt their capacity to be competent and entertaining in social circumstances.

Different approaches can help. For example, if the root issue is one of low self-esteem, tackling this first should make a positive difference.

Trying a structured approach to socialising, such as joining an online or virtual group that gets together to discuss or engage in a particular hobby, can be a good way to start to end a vicious circle.

Chronic loneliness

Chronic loneliness is the term used to describe those who have been lonely for so long that it has become a way of life for them. If solitude has become part of their nature, it can be tricky to break the cycle.

How do you deal with emotional loneliness?

How do you deal with emotional loneliness? Humans are social creatures by nature. You long to connect with others and you want to be loved. It’s normal to want to have someone you can love in return.

Learning about dealing with feeling lonely isn’t simple, but there’s much you can do that can regain that feeling of value and belonging.

There are effective ways you can cope with loneliness, and professional help is available if you’re in need. This article will cover tools for coping with and moving past this feeling.

Accept That It Is Normal.

Just knowing that others around the globe are experiencing the same feelings of loneliness can be helpful. As mentioned earlier, 40% of people will experience loneliness at some point in time.

That number may seem high-after all, the internet and social networking make it easier than ever to connect. But this feeling is subjective. It’s possible to feel emotionally lonely even if you have a significant other, children, or lots of friends.

So if you’re looking for an answer to coping with this loneliness in your own life, just realize there are millions of others feeling the same way. This normal emotion is one that almost everyone experiences at some point, and it’s something that you can overcome.

Recognize the Effects So You Can Combat Them.

Loneliness can be felt. Studies show that loneliness can make you feel colder than those around you, can increase cholesterol and blood pressure, and can even stop your immune system from functioning properly. Loneliness can also disrupt your sleep.

Because it puts your body on ‘high alert,’ it can make you more prone to sleep problems. Insomnia and lack of true rest can both be a result of loneliness. Loneliness leads to self-destructive habits.

Drug abuse, gambling habits, and other self-destructive actions have all been linked with loneliness. Finding a cure for loneliness can prevent these habits from developing in the first place.

Lastly, loneliness can affect your mental health. As it increases, so does depression. One of the main signs of depression is no longer wanting to do things you used to enjoy, including spending time with your friends.

If you think your feelings of loneliness may be a small part of a bigger problem, you should consider seeking help from someone who specializes in treating loneliness as a mental health professional.

Seek Professional Help.

How do you deal with emotional loneliness? Meeting with a mental health professional is one of the most helpful steps you can take in overcoming loneliness and the underlying issues that may be there. A therapist can help you explore the factors behind your feelings.

Other issues surrounding your emotions can be addressed as well. For example, if you’ve recently lost a family member or close friend, you may be experiencing both loneliness and grief. Having experienced professionals support you through the healing process can make all the difference.

Looking to find happiness in the distance as a friend takes a selfie. Sometimes, you might even feel lonely because of your location. Military members who are deployed or spouses who are separated from family and friends often experience a sense of loneliness that seems unsolvable.

You may struggle with meeting new people. If you are in an area where you have few resources, mental health, or otherwise, seeking professional help might seem impossible. It can be the same for those suffering from depression.

In situations like this, Miss Date Doctor can be beneficial. M.D.D is unique because counselling also takes place through an online platform that you can access from any place you feel comfortable. And many people find the Miss Date Doctor also convenient as in-person counselling.

Nurture Existing Relationships.

Loneliness can make us pull away from our relationships, even when we desire them the most. By nurturing the relationships you already have, you can put yourself on a path of learning how to cope with feeling this way.

When the people you once loved or connected with feel distant, it can be hard to take the first step towards fortifying those bonds. Here are some ideas for connecting again:

Schedule time each day (or week) for calling or visiting a friend.
Invite someone out for lunch.
Start up conversations with neighbors when you can.
Use social media for reconnecting with those you’ve lost touch with due to time or distance.
Join a group or club with interests you share.

Practice Positive Self-Talk.

You might be asking how getting rid of negative self-talk has impacts loneliness, but the two go hand-in-hand. Talking positively about yourself and your life can change the outcome of each day, as you listen to these thoughts and they become reality.

Make an effort towards catching these thoughts and replace them with a positive message instead. The process of positive self-talk takes practice, but it can be part of a simple cure for loneliness.

If you decide to seek out online therapy, then you’ll learn all about these positive self-talk techniques. It’s a good way for combating negative feelings and it can significantly improve your life.

Find a Hobby.

Boredom adds weight on top of loneliness. If you’re already struggling with feelings of being lonely or social isolation, the cure isn’t watching Netflix by yourself every night. Instead, find something to occupy your time.

Make sure that what you choose has some social aspect to it. Taking pictures in the park and joining a gardening group through Meetup are both good options. Doing a jigsaw puzzle alone in your apartment, not so much.

Take some time to explore hobby options and then get out there. The “getting out there” part is usually the hardest.

What are the three types of loneliness?

What are the three types of loneliness? Diagnosis is the first step to treatment, so it is in this case. Knowing what you are dealing with keeps you a step ahead.

Three Types of Loneliness

Existential Loneliness

From an existential perspective, a little bit of existential loneliness is good for the soul, and it is definitely an inevitable part of the human experience.

However, loneliness tends to stir up negative feelings, and while those can be helpful in terms of self-exploration, they are also something to which we are averse and want to avoid as much as we can.

Emotional Loneliness

This type of loneliness arises from a feeling that you lack relationships or attachments. You might experience emotional loneliness when everyone but you has a romantic partner in your group.

Being Emotionally lonely can be felt when you need someone to talk to about something going on in your life, but feel that there is no one available to contact. If your heart has broken, you might feel lonely for the person who has moved out of your life.

You might be lonely for a close friend, a parent, a sibling, and so on.

Social Loneliness

What are the three types of loneliness? This type of loneliness occurs when you don’t feel a sense of belonging to a group beyond yourself. You might even feel social loneliness even when you’re in a romantic relationship with a partner you treasure.

If you don’t have a wider circle of social support, you may feel that you, or you and your partner, don’t have a group with whom you belong.

When you walk into a party and don’t recognize anyone familiar, a feeling of social loneliness may wash over you if you don’t typically feel comfortable approaching new people. If you don’t feel that your presence is valued in a wider circle, you might experience social loneliness.

HOW LONG DOES LONELINESS LAST?

There is a chronicity factor of loneliness that influences the intensity and damage it can do. Loneliness might be a transient feeling, a situational feeling, or a chronic feeling.

Most everyone has experienced a fleeting feeling of loneliness on occasion. Situational loneliness can be a more acute feeling of absence.

Especially when it’s accompanied by some other significant transition, such as being alone at lunch on a new job, or moving to a new place as a trailing spouse and feeling abandoned when your spouse heads off to work, and you’re left bereft in the new place with no connections.

Chronic loneliness, however, can result from unabated situational loneliness that lasts more than two years.

To Combat Existential Loneliness

The saying that you are born into this world alone, and you go out alone, suggests that existential loneliness is an inescapable aspect of life.

It can be terrifying for some people to recognize just how alone we all are in this world, even if you have friends and family who love and support you 24/7, no matter what.

Existential fears, including the fears of isolation, death, meaninglessness, and freedom, are experienced by virtually all of us at some point in time.

Recognizing the fear and using it as a motivator to live more fully and more in the moment can help us immerse ourselves in the present, which might help us recognize that we are among a vast sea of individuals struggling against these fears just as we are.

To Combat Emotional Loneliness

The lasting solution to emotional loneliness is to establish and maintain a healthy support system.

You can’t make instant friendship happen or find a soulmate overnight, but you can maximize your chances of deepening a friendship by reaching out to friends and being willing to be the one to suggest a meet-up or get-together.

Waiting around for someone to make the first move is not taking a proactive stance, and because loneliness already reflects a sense of isolation.

If you make the effort to reach out to others, you may be pleasantly surprised at how much better you can begin to feel, even if you just exchange a couple of texts with a friend or have a brief conversation on the phone.

Letting someone know you “need to talk” can open the door to a deeper bond, so long as you don’t overburden others with your needs.

To Combat Social Loneliness

This feeling arises when we feel left out of a larger group. It might be the way you felt when you walked into the high school cafeteria the first day back at school in the fall and couldn’t immediately locate any friendly faces to join at their table.

Exclusion from a group can be painful, even if it’s not intentional. An easy way to combat social loneliness is to jump into a new activity or group.

Maybe a new fitness club is opening in the neighborhood, an “Introduction to Fiber Arts” class is forming at the rec center, or a “Beginner’s Axe Throwing workshop” is starting; volunteer at the animal shelter or at the community food bank.

Whatever is intriguing to you, show up! If everyone in the room is “new,” it can be easier to strike up conversations and new friendships.

If you and your partner feel like you don’t have a shared network of friends, join a beginner’s rhumba or foxtrot, or salsa dance class. Get involved in volunteering together, whether it’s building houses or stuffing envelopes, or delivering meals to the homebound.

You’ll know that the other people in the room at least share a similar interest with you and that is one of the surefire ways to spark a new friendship.

Emotionally lonely in a relationship

Emotionally Lonely in a relationship. Feelings of loneliness can happen to anyone and at any point in their lives, in or out of a relationship. If you’re feeling lonely in a marriage or relationship, it may be time to consider the reasons why and recognize the signs of a lonely relationship.

WHAT ARE THE SIGNS OF LONELINESS IN A RELATIONSHIP?

Loneliness is a sense of feeling disconnected, isolated, and disengaged from others. In terms of loneliness in a relationship, these feelings would apply to your spouse or partner. Feel lonely even when you’re in the same room with them?

Feeling lonely during an evening of watching TV with your significant other is not the same as feeling lonely all the time. Ongoing feelings of disconnection and disengagement from your partner may be a sign that you’re in a lonely relationship.

WHAT CAUSES A LONELY RELATIONSHIP?

Here are some of the factors that can lead to feeling lonely in a marriage or relationship:

Intimacy fizzles:

Emotionally lonely in a relationship. Some relationships just lose their spark. If you feel a loss of connection and affection, you may be left simply going through the motions. Intimacy plays a big part in getting deeply connected.

Without this connection to your partner, you may begin to feel a sense of isolation and separation, which may lead to feelings of loneliness.

Incompatibility:

Couples who get together and ultimately find they are not compatible may end up in a dead-end relationship. Resentment, intolerance, impatience, and unhappiness can replace what was once possibly a blissful existence.

If you end up in a relationship like this, loneliness could be among the emotions and feelings that bubble up to the surface.

Distance and physical separation:

When a spouse or partner is away for long periods whether due to military service or work, the physical separation may lead to one or both partners suffering from loneliness.

Health problems:

Feelings of loneliness may occur in relationships where a spouse or partner is dealing with a chronic illness, battling a serious disease, or is even hospitalized.

Emotional issues:

Issues like substance use and depression can introduce loneliness into the relationship. It’s important that your healthcare provider, a therapist, or counsellor is engaged. They can help address all factors of the relationship, including the causes and effects.

Physical or emotional abuse:

Any kind of abuse in a relationship can certainly lead to loneliness, but it can also lead to depression, substance use, and injury, as well. If there is abuse occurring now or in the past, please talk to your health care provider, a counselor, or a therapist about it.

Emotional loneliness examples

Emotional loneliness examples. The outbreak of coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19) prompted people to face a distressing and unexpected situation.

Uncertainty and social distancing changed people’s behaviors, impacting their feelings, daily habits, and social relationships, which are core elements of human well-being. In particular, restrictions due to the quarantine increased feelings of loneliness and anxiety.

Within this context, the use of digital technologies has been recommended to relieve stress and anxiety and decrease loneliness, even though the overall effects of social media consumption during pandemics still need to be carefully addressed.

In this regard, social media uses evidence of risk and opportunities. In fact, according to a compensatory model of Internet-related activities, the online environment may be used to alleviate negative feelings caused by distressing life circumstances, despite potentially leading to negative outcomes.

Emotionally lonely examples. The present study examined whether individuals who were experiencing high levels of loneliness during the forced isolation of the COVID-19 pandemic were more prone to feel anxious and whether their sense of loneliness prompted excessive social media use.

Moreover, the potentially mediating effect of excessive social media use in the relationship between perceived loneliness and anxiety was tested. A sample of 715 adults (71.5% women) aged between 18 and 72 years old took part in an online survey during the period of lockdown in Italy.

The survey included self-report measures to assess perceived sense of loneliness, excessive use of social media, and anxiety. Participants reported that they spent more hours/day on social media during the pandemic than before the pandemic.

We found evidence that perceived feelings of loneliness predicted both excessive social media use and anxiety, with excessive social media use also increasing anxiety levels.

These findings suggest that isolation probably reinforced the individuals’ sense of loneliness, strengthening the need to be part of virtual communities.

However, the facilitated and prolonged access to social media during the COVID-19 pandemic risked further increasing anxiety, generating a vicious cycle that in some cases may require clinical attention.

Chronic loneliness

Chronic loneliness. Chronic loneliness is a term to describe loneliness that’s experienced over a long period of time. While loneliness, and chronic loneliness, aren’t specific mental health conditions, they can still affect your mental and general health.

Loneliness describes the negative feelings that can occur when your needs for social connection aren’t met. It’s normal to enjoy spending time alone on occasion. In fact, alone time might help you relax and recharge.

People have different needs for alone time, so you might need more than someone else to feel your best.

Still, aloneness and loneliness aren’t quite the same. When you’re enjoying your solitude, you most likely don’t feel isolated in a negative way or crave contact with others. Isolation and loneliness often go hand in hand, and both can affect not only emotional health but also overall well-being.

WHY ARE PEOPLE LONELY?

Loneliness can happen for a number of reasons. For example, you might feel lonely if you:

Change schools or jobs
Work from home
Move to a new city
End a relationship
Living alone for the first time

As you adjust to these new circumstances, feelings of loneliness may pass, but sometimes they persist. It’s not always easy to talk about feeling emotionally lonely, and if you have a hard time reaching out to others, you might feel even more alone.

A lack of meaningful connections also contributes to loneliness, which is why you can feel lonely even if you have a wide social network.

Maybe you have a lot of casual friends and fill your time with social activities but don’t feel too close to anyone. Spending a lot of time with couples and families can also lead to feelings of loneliness if you’re single and don’t want to be. This could happen even when you’re happily single.

Living with mental or physical health issues can also increase the risk of loneliness. Health concerns can be isolating, since it can be difficult to explain how you feel. Sometimes social activities demand too much emotional or physical energy, and you might end up canceling more plans than you keep.

Eventually, a continued lack of social connection might make you feel even worse.

SYMPTOMS

If you’re lonely, you may feel sad, empty, or as if you’re lacking something important when you spend time by yourself. Chronic loneliness can also involve the following symptoms:

Decreased energy
Feeling foggy or unable to focus
Insomnia interrupted sleep or other sleep issues
Decreased appetite
Feelings of self-doubt, hopelessness, or worthlessness
A tendency to get sick frequently
Body aches and pains
Feelings of anxiousness or restlessness
Increased shopping
Substance misuse
Cravings for physical warmth, such as hot drinks, baths, or cozy clothes and blankets

DIAGNOSIS

Loneliness, even chronic loneliness, isn’t a specific mental health condition. However, experts increasingly recognize the ways loneliness can affect your physical and emotional health.

If you’ve been feeling emotionally lonely and experience unexplained symptoms such as the above signs of loneliness, talking to a mental health professional could help.

A therapist can help you uncover any possible mental health causes of your symptoms. Even though there’s no diagnosis for loneliness, therapy can help you access support and potentially helpful resources.

A therapist can also teach you tips to cope with the effects of loneliness and help you explore ways to make positive changes.

COMPLICATIONS

Experts increasingly suggest loneliness and isolation can have far-reaching effects on health, whether they occur together or independently of each other. Here’s a look at what some recent research says.

Loneliness symptoms

Loneliness symptoms. While loneliness is a transient feeling that many of us will experience at some point in our lives, longstanding loneliness can severely affect both our mental and physical health.

Social anxiety

If you are regularly feeling lonely, a key indicator might be that social events leave you feeling burned out, emotionally drained, or mentally exhausted.

In terms of mental health, emotionally lonely individuals are more prone to depression and anxiety, particularly social anxiety. It also puts individuals at greater risk of cognitive decline and dementia

High blood pressure

There is strong evidence that loneliness can also have an adverse effect on physical health too. This is probably a consequence of the stress that is experienced through loneliness which results in higher levels of natural steroids.

This can cause high blood pressure and elevated levels of cholesterol which results in higher levels of cardiovascular disease.

It has been estimated that living with loneliness is equivalent to the effect of smoking a packet of cigarettes each day and that it puts people at a 50% increased risk of death.

Difficulty sleeping

Loneliness symptoms. Insomnia disrupted sleep or other sleep-related issues may all be physical symptoms of loneliness. Another sign is sleeping too much; often when people are feeling sad, or in this case lonely, many turn to sleep as a way to block out how they feel.

According to previous research published in the journal Sleep, loneliness can wreck the chances of getting a restful night’s sleep.

What we found was that loneliness does not appear to change the total amount of sleep in individuals, but awakens them more times during the night. When you feel lonely, you show more micro-awakenings.

Loss of confidence

Loneliness is an emotional response to an unwanted situation. Over time, loneliness can affect confidence and self-esteem and make people withdraw from others – and end up avoiding situations that may help reduce feelings of loneliness.

Loss of appetite and exercising

Some signs of loneliness also include a loss of appetite and not finding the motivation to exercise.

Lifestyle-related, i.e. people may take less care over eating well/healthily, may not exercise as much as they should, are more likely to smoke and we know these have a negative effect on our health.

Feeling in a constant “unpleasant” state

While many of us will suffer bouts of sadness, those with chronic loneliness will feel like they are constantly in an “unpleasant” state, unable to find any hope.

If we think about loneliness as this adaptive response kind of like hunger and thirst, it’s this unpleasant state that motivates us to seek out social connections just like hunger motivates us to seek out food.

How to cure loneliness?

How to cure loneliness? Regardless of the reason, loneliness is painful. Even worse, it can lead to mental health issues, such as depression and Alzheimer’s disease, and physical conditions, including heart disease and cancer.

We can take steps, however, to cope with loneliness and even change our state of mind.

Practice Gratitude

Studies have shown that acts of gratitude can help us feel more positive and have stronger relationships.

Think of the people in your life you appreciate. They may include someone from the past who had a major impact on your life, such as a mentor in your youth. Or they could be someone you see more frequently, such as the friend who recently helped you move.

Consider sending this person a handwritten card or letter, reaching out by email, or calling to express your appreciation. Not only will you likely brighten someone’s day with your action, but you will make yourself happier by fostering the connection and being kind.

Even silently recognizing a good person or situation in your life can develop a sense of gratitude.

Keeping a gratitude journal, in which you write about what you feel grateful for, can improve your mental health. Gratitude journaling helps us realize what we have in our lives as opposed to what we lack.

For a more targeted approach to gratitude journaling, follow the Three Good Things exercise in which you write about three good things (large or small) that happened throughout your day. Try the practice daily for a set period of time, such as one week, and note if your sense of loneliness has shifted.

Participate in Meaningful Activities

How to cure loneliness? By pursuing your passions, your mind and spirit are engaged, decreasing feelings of loneliness. By joining a recreational sports team, library book club, volunteer effort, or other activities you enjoy, you are also more likely to meet others who have shared interests.

If you find that you don’t see your friends as often as you’d like, consider setting up a recurring virtual gathering. Having a date and time planned in your calendar (for example, 2pm every other Tuesday) will encourage everyone to meet automatically and make it easy to maintain your connections with each other.

Remember That You Are Unique

Feeling less than can contribute to feelings of loneliness. Try to avoid comparing yourself to others. It is only human to look at someone else and feel sad when their surface-level feelings or apparent situation seem happier than our own.

We have pretty critical minds. Our mind has evolved to be our threat detector. And our brain is going to be keeping an eye on things like: Are you doing all the things to connect? Are you keeping up with the Joneses?

With these questions, some information can be useful and some is not. The only way to really tell is to defuse, step back and notice that your mind is having a field day with my social interactions.

And that gives you the liberty to ask: Is this helping me? Or can I organize my thoughts and mental energy in another way?

Sometimes, if we get hooked on negative social evaluations, we can get stuck in organizing our behavior around avoidance. As a result, you might not behave in a way that benefits you the most and instead, you’re feeding negative personal judgment.

Such comparisons can create a sense of distance from others. However, that increases our sense of isolation. It’s important to realize we never know what is going on in someone else’s life.

We all have good times as well as challenging periods in our lives—and keeping this universal truth in mind can help us feel connected.

On the other hand, remember that you are unique: There is no one else on earth like you. It can be satisfying to recognize that you are doing what you can with what you have.

Connect With Yourself

Solitude is different from loneliness because it is the state of being alone without necessarily feeling emotionally lonely. The word often implies there is an opportunity for reflection or doing things we enjoy.

While there are various ways you can reduce loneliness through connecting to others, consider the relationship you have with yourself and how you can enrich it. If you can do this, you may feel less isolated.

Change your criteria for success. Don’t ask:

Am I keeping up with whoever is in my social circles? Am I keeping up in a way that my mind says is comparable to others?

Ask yourself questions:

Am I being true to myself today? Have I been kind or a good friend? Did I do things that are consistent with what I value?

Engaging in small mental choices and small habitual changes over time can give you a sense of self-efficacy, esteem, and comfort with yourself.

Set aside a period of time each day to check in with yourself. You could meditate, pray, practice yoga, or read a couple of pages of a spiritual text. This practice can be done in as little as five minutes, but it’s helpful to do it every day so it becomes a healthy habit.

Connecting with yourself doesn’t mean turning inward and calling it a day. We’ve all heard it before, but it’s so important to exercise and eat a balanced diet with plenty of fruits and vegetables. What we eat directly affects our body and mind.

If you are experiencing anxiety or depression, consider cutting back on alcohol because it can make you feel worse. Additionally, getting enough sleep, 7-9 hours per night for adults is one of the most important things we can do for our health.

Loneliness psychology

Loneliness psychology. Loneliness is one of the most powerful experiences in human psychology. It’s also one of the most misunderstood.

While everybody basically knows what it means to be lonely, it’s surprisingly hard to define it precisely. This is partly because our experience of loneliness tends to be so varied and individual-specific.

What’s more, loneliness and the fear of loneliness are often powerful influences in our lives, frequently leading to poor decisions and self-sabotage.

Loneliness is an emotion characterized by the feeling of pain caused by a perceived lack of intimacy with other people or ourselves.

NOTE THESE FEW POINTS

Loneliness is an emotion.

It’s important to distinguish upfront that we are thinking about loneliness as an internal emotion rather than an external state of affairs. In other words, loneliness is different from isolation. Many people who are isolated experience loneliness.

But many people seek out isolation and experience it as a positive thing. When this happens, we often describe it as solitude. It’s also worth noting that isolation is not a requirement for loneliness: you can feel lonely even when you’re surrounded by other people.

In fact, many people describe the most acute bouts of loneliness occurring precisely when they are surrounded by people.

Loneliness is painful.

Loneliness psychology. This may seem obvious that loneliness is an aversive or uncomfortable feeling. But it’s good to be clear about this since many people feel good when they are alone or distant from others.

As we mentioned above, many people seek out solitude because they find it restorative or helpful in promoting creativity, for example.

Loneliness comes from perception.

Loneliness is never something that can be definitively observed by an external observer because—like all emotions—it comes from a person’s subjective perception. It is important to be clear about the fundamentally subjective and individual-specific nature of loneliness.

While there are many common elements of loneliness across individuals, I think it’s safe to say that no two people’s experience of loneliness is exactly the same.

Loneliness is about a lack of intimacy.

This is a divergence from the other definitions of loneliness. From people’s experience, especially a professional therapist, what seems to characterize loneliness most uniquely is that it’s about the absence of intimacy with other people.

While this lack of intimacy often happens on the level of the physical or in terms of shared interests or values, the core of it seems to be fundamentally emotional in nature—that is, it’s about not feeling connected enough with other people (or ourselves) on an emotional level.

Of course, this is just my definition.

These are real facts when it comes to defining loneliness. And like I said, it’s the nature of definitions that they are always somewhat inadequate to everybody’s unique experience.

Still, I think it’s a good start that covers a lot of bases and also adds something important to the typical way of thinking about loneliness.

WHAT CAN YOU DO IF YOU ARE FEELING LONELY IN A RELATIONSHIP?

If you’re feeling like you’re all by yourself in your relationship, consider these tips:

Talk to your partner or spouse:

It’s important to let them know how you feel. You and your partner or spouse may be able to work together for the good of the relationship. For example, maybe it’s time to plan a weekend getaway or a date night.

Even a walk in the park together could help relieve a sense of loneliness. Carve out even a small chunk of time to focus attention on each other.

Spend some time among friends or family:

Just because you are lonely in your relationship, doesn’t necessarily mean you feel lonely when you’re among friends or loved ones. If the company of others helps ease your lonely relationship, then make plans to do things with others.

See if these moments of connectedness can help ease your feelings of loneliness with your partner or spouse.

Talk to a couples’ counsellor:

It may be that your relationship just needs some TLC. If your partner’s willing, some therapy time with a couples’ counselor may help you and your partner explore what could be contributing to loneliness in the relationship or marriage. A therapist may even suggest ways to work past it.

Get involved outside your relationship: Maybe spending less time around your spouse or partner can help ease feelings of loneliness and actually help the relationship.

Volunteer opportunities, hobby clubs, running, biking, and workout groups, are all possible ways to focus your energies elsewhere and bring enjoyment to your life, outside the scope of your relationship.

Types of loneliness

Types of loneliness. Loneliness is of different types because people become lonely for different reasons. Like I earlier said, knowing the type of loneliness you are suffering from makes it a bit easier to combat. Here are common types of loneliness people are often plagued with.

Intimate loneliness.

The first type is intimate loneliness, whereby the person is missing a connection with somebody who is a trusted confidant.

This could be a partner or best friend, or anyone with whom you don’t have to have any facade.

Relational loneliness.

Types of loneliness. The second type of loneliness is relational loneliness. That’s when we’re missing friendships – the kind of relationships with people with whom we may spend weekends and go out to dinner on a Friday night.

These are folks that we may have over for a barbecue or for a social gathering or birthday party. And when we miss those friends, we experience relational loneliness.

There’s a difference between having friendships and experiencing friendships. The absence of ‘experiencing friendships’ gives rise to loneliness.

Experiencing friendships means social interactions including phone calls, visiting friends, and having conversations with friends.

When you realise how extraordinarily common loneliness is you start to realise that many of those friends who you are no longer in touch with are probably struggling with loneliness as well. Reaching out to them could be a lifeline for both of you.

Collective loneliness.

.The third type of loneliness is collective loneliness. This is when we miss being part of a community with which we have a shared identity or a common sense of purpose.

This can come in a variety of forms, including a Facebook group, a volunteer organisation, or even at the office.

Emotionally Lonely Conclusion

Emotionally Lonely Conclusion. It isn’t a bad thing to be alone, or enjoy being alone. But being alone when you’d rather spend time with other people can lead to feelings of loneliness and have other effects on your mood, sleep, and overall well-being.

Some people experience loneliness in passing, but other people may feel lonely for months or even years with no improvement.

Loneliness isn’t a mental health condition with a clear recommended treatment, so you might wonder how to deal with it. Overcoming loneliness can seem like a real challenge, especially if you’re shy, introverted, or find it difficult to meet new people.

It may take some time, but it’s very possible to build new relationships or deepen existing connections in your life.

If you aren’t sure what you can do to feel less lonely, consider reaching out to a therapist who can offer help and support.

Emotionally Lonely Conclusion. The following tips can often help keep you from feeling lonely in the first place:

Get comfortable with spending time alone. This doesn’t mean you have to be alone all the time. It’s generally considered important for people to have at least some contact with others.

But if you enjoy the time you spend on your own, you’re more likely to feel positive about it, even when being alone may not be your first choice.

Choose fulfilling and rewarding activities. Relaxing on the sofa in front of your favorite TV show can feel comforting, and humorous content, in particular, may have a positive impact on your mood.

But make sure to include a range of activities in your life, including creative or physical pursuits. Even listening to music or reading a book could have more of a positive impact on loneliness.

Make time for exercise. Exercise is known to have a positive impact on mental health. While exercise may not relieve loneliness on its own, it can help improve your mood overall and increase your feelings of wellness, which may offer some protection against loneliness.

Enjoy the outdoors. Sunlight can help increase serotonin in your body, which can help improve your mood.

Research suggests spending time in nature can help relieve feelings of depression, anxiety, and stress. Joining a group walk or team sport can also help you connect with others at the same time.

Further reading

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