Switch Currency:

  • Relationship Coaching London
  • Relationship Coaching London
    Generic selectors
    Exact matches only
    Search in title
    Search in content
    Post Type Selectors

What Are Emotionally Charged Events?

What Are Emotionally Charged Events?

What Are Emotionally Charged Events 1

What are emotionally charged events? When something is emotionally charged, it means that someone is experiencing strong, raw, and uninhibited emotions that can be difficult to control.


Whether a meltdown during rush hour traffic or a disagreement with a lover, emotionally charged responses look a lot like a temper tantrum thrown by a very vocal toddler. In most cases, this uncontrollable release or explosion of emotion follows some sort of trigger.


The trigger acts as a proverbial tug on an emotional plug, releasing long pent-up frustration and hurt.


What are emotionally charged events? Cruelly and ironically, this kind of emotionally charged response can serve as a trigger for someone else, leading the two involved down a dark spiral of unchecked emotions and angry words.


And when that happens, it works like a positive feedback loop, where one triggered response perpetuates another…


…and so on until someone has the insight to walk away.


What are emotionally charged events? Needless to say, emotionally charged situations can be exhausting at best and damaging at worst. So what should you do if you find yourself in an emotionally charged situation?


When we experience a highly emotional time in our lives — such as a wedding or break-up, childbirth, or even major historical events like 9/11 — we tend to remember it for good. But why are eventful times more vividly recalled than the less notable days, weeks, and months that slip from our minds?


A robust body of previous research has shown that the more emotional impact memory has — either positive or negative — the more vividly we will recall its details and the more likely it will be stored in long-term memory.

Why Do We Remember Emotional Events More

What Are Emotionally Charged Events 2

What are emotionally charged events? A normal function of emotion is to enhance memory to improve recall of experiences that have importance or relevance for our survival. Emotion acts like a highlighter that emphasizes certain aspects of experiences to make them more memorable. Memory formation involves registering information, processing and storage, and retrieval.


Emotion affects all the phases of memory formation. Here’s how.


  1. Attention


What are emotionally charged events? Attention guides our focus to select what’s most relevant to our lives and is normally associated with novelty. Nothing focuses the mind like a surprise. For example, although one may thoroughly enjoy a particular conversation, the same conversation a second time around would be dull.


Emotional intensity acts to narrow the scope of attention so that a few objects are emphasized at the expense of many others. Focusing on a very narrow area allows for optimal use of our limited attentional capacity.


  1. Consolidation of a memory


Most of the information we acquire is forgotten and never makes it into long-term memory. When we learn a complex problem, the short-term memory is freed up and the action becomes automatic.


Emotionally charged events are remembered better than those of neutral events. You will never forget some events, such as the joy of the birth of your first child, or the horror of the 9/11 terrorist attack. The stress hormones epinephrine and cortisol enhance and consolidate memory. In evolutionary terms, it’s logical for us to imprint dangerous situations with extra clarity so that we may avoid them in the future.


  1. Memory recall


What are emotionally charged events? Memories of painful emotional experiences linger far longer than those involving physical pain. There is an old saying that “sticks and stones can break your bones, but words can never hurt you.”


On the contrary, evidence shows that hurt feelings could be worse than physical pain. I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. There is evidence that acetaminophen (e.g., Tylenol) works not only on physical pain but also on emotional pain.


  1. Mood memory


Our current emotional state facilitates the recall of experiences that had a similar emotional tone. When we are in a happy mood, we tend to recall pleasant events and vice versa. This is because moods bring different associations to mind. For example, being in a bad mood primes a person to think about negative things.


  1. Blanking out


What are emotionally charged events? Stress can lead to memory deficits, such as the common experience of mentally blanking during a high-pressure exam or interview. Thus, worrying about how you will perform on a test may contribute to a lower test score.


In general, anxiety influences cognitive performance in a curvilinear manner (an inverted U-curve). This phenomenon is known as the Yerkes–Dodson law. That is, when levels of arousal are too low (boredom) and when levels of arousal are too high (anxiety or fear) performance is likely to suffer.


Under situations of low arousal, the mind is unfocused. In contrast, under situations of high stimulation, the focus of attention is too narrow, and important information may be lost. The optimal situation is moderate arousal.

How Do You Succeed In Emotionally Charged Situations?

What are emotionally charged events? Finding yourself in an emotionally charged conversation or interaction with another person can leave both parties in a very precarious position. The smallest lack of judgment from either side could result in someone seriously losing it. So it’s helpful to keep your emotions in check as much as possible.


But this can be very hard to do.


To help stem the flow of uprising emotions, here are a few ways that can help you stay calm.


  1. Take a moment to breathe some deep breaths


What are emotionally charged events? If your feathers have been ruffled and you can feel things going in a direction you’d rather avoid, then try taking a few slow deep breaths.


Deep breathing not only gives you a minute to collect your thoughts but also resets your vagus nerve, which can have a relaxing effect on your body. The vagus nerve connects your brain to all of your internal organs and serves as a counterpoint to the fight-or-flight stress response, which is exactly what we find ourselves in during an emotionally charged situation.


By taking a few deep breaths, you are stimulating the vagus nerve and thereby telling your body to chill out.


By doing so, you are giving your whole body and mind a chance to reflect on why this person before you has evoked such an emotional response from you.


  1. Step back and question yourself


Never react when you are feeling emotionally heightened. Rather try asking yourself these questions:


Is this a situation that I can control?


Am I misreading someone’s intentions?


Is it that important to prove my point or have my opinion heard?


Will I worsen the situation if I inject my thoughts into this interaction?


How do I come across when I’m angry? Is it healthy to show that side of me right now?


Is my body language threatening?


Am I raising my voice?


What are emotionally charged events? Thoughtful and introspective self-questioning can help to intellectualize the emotions you are experiencing. Normally, a touch of logic is all you need to see that your actions may well be adding fuel to the emotional fire.


  1. Decide that you want to demonstrate calmness


You certainly cannot control how someone else is behaving but you can control how you are. Therefore, deciding that you are going to show the other person that you are calm will help in settling their emotional state also.


Even if it doesn’t, it will allow you to act with intention rather than react with emotion.


Think about how you’d like that person to act and demonstrate that yourself. This helps diffuse conflicts rather than inflame them.


  1. Express compassion and empathy


What are emotionally charged events? As hard as it may be, showing someone that you are empathetic to their opinion or compassionate to how they are feeling can help to deflate an emotionally charged situation.


Begin by paraphrasing what the other person said to make sure that you’re understanding their points clearly. Then express compassion for their experience to let them know that they are seen and respected, which is often the ultimate goal behind any emotional meltdown.


One of the most well-studied ways to do this is by using “I” statements. The idea is to begin your statements with “I” or “From my perspective” so that you can make it clear to the other person that you’re simply sharing your perspective. It also helps communicate that you’re not making a judgment about the other person but simply experiencing the situation differently than they are.


  1. Reflect on your experience


As much as we would rather avoid an emotionally charged interaction with another person, it is sometimes inevitable and the best way to deal with the aftermath is to reflect and learn from this experience.


A good way to do this is to write down your emotions in a journal or diary.


This will have a calming effect and allow you to better process how you are feeling. Journaling also allows you to let go of any hurt that may reside from this unfortunate interaction with the other person.


What Are Emotionally Charged Events Conclusion

What Are Emotionally Charged Events Conclusion 1

What are emotionally charged events conclusion? Healthy communication is the lifeblood of any good relationship, whether it be personal or professional.


Prove to yourself and others that you are not a victim of your emotions and that you can talk your way through anything with consideration and understanding.


What are emotionally charged events conclusion? This will not only help you perform better professionally, but it will also assist in improving your relationships with your friends and loved ones.

Further reading

Dating coach
Relationship Courses
All Services
Improve my relationship
I think my boyfriend is cheating on me
Family Therapy

Overwhelmed meaning


PTSD quotes

Cheating quotes

Relationship poems

What to do if a guy doesn’t text you for a week

Stages of a rebound relationship

Feeling used

I am too scared to date again

9 texts to never send a man or woman

I still love my ex

Do you have anger issues please take the test click here

Do guys notice when you ignore them

Why can’t I get over my ex who treated me badly?

Communal Narcissism

Emotional cheating texting

Narcissist love bombing

Treat your inbox

Receive our newsletter on the latest deals and happenings. You can unsubscribe any time you want. Read more on our newsletter sign up