Table of Contents hide

1.1 What Happens When You Appease Someone?

1.3 Can Couples Feel Each Other’s Emotions?

1.4 How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship?

1.5 What Makes A Man Feel Connected To A Woman?

1.6 What Does Lack Of Affection Do To A Woman?

1.6.1 The Appeaser In Relationships Conclusion

The Appeaser In Relationships

The Appeaser In Relationships. There are many ways people get out of conflict. One way I witness partners end or avoid conflict is to pacify their partner by accepting all of the blame or by agreeing with whatever request their partner is making.

The Appeaser In Relationships. This is what I call the “Yes, Dear” strategy for solving relationship problems.

Because it typically makes the partner happy or at least less angry, it works well in the short term, but often proves disastrous in the long run, especially over time.

To change this strategy it is important to understand what happens when we encounter conflict.

If you experience poor models of conflict resolution you may become emotionally triggered when conflict occurs.

Current conflict can bring back old memories and accompanying emotions, all of which can feel unbearable to hold.

If you have traumatic memories around conflict (for example your parents were engaged in a long-term custody battle) what comes up during these times is much more than annoyance or discomfort.

You may experience your body becoming flooded with emotions. When you become overwhelmed with emotions your old brain (aka reptilian brain) takes over and you are no longer able to think straight.

You may even feel like you are “trapped”, “caged” or “suffocating”. Your body may freeze and your mind can become blank, unable to know or express what you are thinking or feeling.

In this state, self-preservation becomes your focus, not the relationship. You must find a way to end this very frightening experience.

The Appeaser In Relationships. One way to do this is to give your partner what he or she wants. The “Yes, Dear” strategy is a way to end your suffering.

The Appeaser In Relationships. However, your partner does not see that fear is behind your choice of using the “Yes, Dear” strategy.

The moment the falsehood is told your partner believes you are sincere. He or she believes you will follow through with the agreement and/or its content by the fact you are willing to take accountability.

However, this is a stopgap. Since you spoke from fear rather than sincerity, it is only a matter of time before the agreement falls through or you repeat the behaviours you agreed were to blame for a lack of harmony in your relationship.

The Appeaser In Relationships. Your partner will experience “Yes, Dear” as a symbol of broken promises, false agreements and lies.

The Appeaser In Relationships. Ironically the “Yes-Dear” approach ends one argument only to start another argument fueled with compounded anger and dissatisfaction.

The most important thing you can do to increase the likelihood of productive conflict resolution is to learn tools to help you self-soothe once triggered.

While it is often difficult to prevent triggering, it is possible to both identify triggers and learn how to manage the flooding of emotions.

From an emotionally regulated place you can stay with the conflict to see it through and avoid making promises you can’t keep.

Helping couples enter into productive conflict resolution is a key focus of my work. During couples therapy, you will learn how to identify your triggers, effective mindfulness skills to help you self-soothe and ways your partner can assist you in this process.

The Appeaser In Relationships. One way that some individuals choose is appeasement. When appeasement occurs, one spouse regularly yields his/her feelings, beliefs or ideas to pacify or please the other.

The Appeaser In Relationships. To some, this seems like a noble position to assume. After all, keeping peace and harmony in the relationship is important.

But, is “giving in to get along” an effective method for dealing with conflict?

The simple answer to this question is “no”. The Appeaser In Relationships. Appeasement is not an effective strategy in marriage or other areas of life.

It is certainly good and gracious to be accommodating and obliging to the preferences of your spouse in various circumstances.

The Appeaser In Relationships. However, appeasement is not a productive manner in which to approach conflict. In healthy relationships, both spouses learn to give and take.

When one spouse always gives and the other always takes, major problems are unavoidable.

The Appeaser In Relationships. Yielding to your spouse may appear to achieve the peace that is sought, but this peace is temporal and superficial.

The Appeaser In Relationships. In reality, appeasement generally sets in motion an inner struggle that will eventually harm both spouses and the relationship itself.

This style of dealing with conflict is fraught with difficulties. Here are some of the reasons why…

Appeasement can lead to a controlling relationship.

The Appeaser In Relationships. Constant yielding to one’s spouse will empower him/her to assume a position of dominance in the relationship. This creates an imbalance that will ultimately harm both individuals.

Respect is diminished or destroyed.

The Appeaser In Relationships. Both the appeasing spouse and the empowered spouse lose respect for one another for different reasons.

What Happens When You Appease Someone?

What Happens When You Appease Someone?

Positive regard and mutual acceptance are eroded because the opinion of each spouse is lowered in the mind of the other.

What Happens When You Appease Someone?

The appeasing spouse lives with unmet needs.

He/she represses heartfelt feelings at the expense of legitimate needs. Unfulfilled needs tend to re-emerge and manifest themselves in other ways – both open and hidden.

The presentation can vary widely, but some common effects are depression, anger, bitterness, resentment, regret, and so forth.

What Happens When You Appease Someone? Appeasement does not resolve conflict.

It merely buries it for the time being. Unresolved conflicts will eventually arise from their shallow graves and come back to haunt the relationship by stifling growth and inhibiting marital satisfaction.

I’m sorry” carries a lot of weight when it’s genuine. Saying it requires vulnerability to admit wrongdoing and the hurt that that wrongdoing has inflicted on the person you’re apologizing to.

To be truly sorry means feeling regret or sorrow over an unfortunate situation and your role in it.

But in unhealthy relationships, people often say, “I’m sorry” not to express genuine regret; instead, they use it to manipulate their significant other.

In such cases, these words mean something else entirely, including the following five possible meanings and their synonyms.

What Happens When You Appease Someone? A declaration made out of selfishness

Synonym: I don’t want to feel guilty anymore

I feel guilty because of what happened, and guilt isn’t a good feeling. I’m saying that I’m sorry to make myself feel better, not you.

What Happens When You Appease Someone? A means to end a dispute that the apologizer would prefer to avoid, often for lack of caring

Synonym: This conversation is over

I’m tired and bored with this disagreement so I’m using these words to end it. I probably don’t believe it or don’t care enough to get to the real issue and so I’ll say this, so you’ll stop pressing for more.

It may seem that I’m submitting to your point here, but in fact, I’m using this phrase to avoid doing so.

A method of appeasement to control another person

Synonym: I’m in control

I’m telling you what you want to hear not because I mean it, but because I know it will appease you and then allow me to pull your strings as I desire.

If I don’t say it, there’s a high likelihood of some outcome occurring that I don’t want to happen—maybe you’ll stop talking to me or leave me home alone while you go out with your friends or break up with me for good.

“I’m sorry” is simply a tool I pull out from my toolbox to prevent these things from happening.

A phrase designed to elicit an apology from the other party, whereby the original apologizer can deflect full responsibility to that other person; usually said in a hostile or sarcastic tone and often followed by an explicit or implicit “…but this is your fault”

Synonym: you should be sorry

I wanted to hurt you and I did exactly what I knew would do so.

But you started it—like always, you did something to make me upset: you weren’t where you said you’d be, you smiled at that stranger in an overtly flirtatious way, and you took too long to respond to my text.

Even though you might pretend that you didn’t mean to hurt me, I know that’s a lie. This is your fault; in fact, you should be apologizing to me.

A means of furthering the test of how far the apologizer can push the other person’s boundaries and get away with it

Synonym: I’m testing you

I know what will hurt you and I do it with pleasure. I’m testing you to see what I can get away with—to see what you’ll put up with and what you want.

“I’m sorry” is just something I say before I do this again—maybe the same way, or maybe slightly different.

Don’t worry, over time you’ll become desensitized to this; it will simply be “normal,” and so I’ll continue to push further so I can provoke you to react and keep myself entertained.

The hidden meaning behind any disingenuous “I’m sorry” is the same: I’m not sorry because you deserve it. This is the lie that manipulators who lavish false apologies spread.

But no one deserves to be harmed, whether physically, emotionally, or with words. If your partner keeps telling you “I’m sorry” and you continue to feel worse, watch their actions.

Are they acting like someone who regrets what they’ve done, or are they doing it again, or maybe in a slightly different way?

When it comes to determining if you’re in a relationship with a healthy partner, what they do is more important than what they say.

Why Do People Appease?

Why Do People Appease? Appeasing others is exacerbated by the proliferation of social media. Two generations thus far grew up with this expectation of being accepted.

Either people do things or profess to do things to meet this expectation. I have witnessed this behaviour numerous times, and often there’s a dichotomy in the person’s real and virtual lives.

I find it uncomfortable to be with such a person in real life, as that person always tries to prove something to others, especially when somebody challenges that person.

Once the process of loving yourself begins, people tend to realize that they are ok with saying no because they know that their feelings and actions are also valid.

Pick and choose what you want to do for others, while also making sure that there is a balance between give and take.

Those that care for you, and plan on sticking by you, will be ok with you telling them no.

We start doing this when we are young. Think about all of the times, when you were just a little kid and you promised to be someone’s friend if they shared a toy or played with you.

Or if someone got mad at you for something trivial now but at that time of your life, you knew it meant the kids of two of your friends

High School could be the worst. You felt like everyone would turn their back on you or worse.

So we learn to compromise. That compromise appeases the rumours, the gossip or the anger toward us.

We don’t enjoy that hurt when we are left out of the fun stuff. We don’t want to have people whispering and looking at us.

That is where being “compelled” comes in. It hurts more than we can describe.

What fails to be understood though, is what others feel when we do the same thing.

Why Do People Appease? Most people like to avoid confrontation. Avoiding conflict can make a person appease others just to keep the peace. We also want to be liked by others.

Why Do People Appease? It’s a human condition to want that human societal acceptance. It is a selfish trait to have because you’re not doing things for yourself, it’s not honest when you only want others to be happy and accept your existence.

Like a sense of wanting attention. Not saying that it’s a bad trait but if mismanaged, your ego could run rampant and ruin your life.

The best way to control this is self-reflection and to love and accept oneself before you love others.

Check yourself before you wreck yourself.

As a species, we are a group of farming tribes that worked together before the industrial revolution.

We all need to have similar ideals and bond with other people. We have an inherent attraction towards leadership. Also, in turn for appeasing other groups of humans.

This is a reflection of ourselves, and it is validation that you are who you think you are, and you are whoever they perceive you to be.

If people are proud or look up to you, you live that hype and it feels good.

“When humans work together equally as brothers, there will be great joy in love and understanding. We help each other because we are all connected and positive energy carries big medicine.

Why Do People Appease? Some feel that’s the only way to get approval, others just to keep the peace and be liked, and others just get mentally wired to always please people it’s stupid in my opinion that u gotta wait for somebody’s okay to make a move

Because we realise we are dependent on other people.

There is nothing worse than feeling you are being left out. To most people, it gives them feelings of anxiety.

When you appease you try to quench those feelings of anxiety. And in most cases that works fine.

Lots of people are reciprocal and will thus be mutually appeasive. In good relationships, it works.

But where it may not work is in dysfunctional relationships or with dysfunctional people. Aside from appeasing people, you also have to maintain your boundaries.

Children of divorced parents for instance sometimes tend to be more agreeable, because they have learned that to be agreeable is to appease and to keep the relationship with their parents intact, to whom they depend.

But highly agreeable people are also more likely to have their feelings stepped upon or lose out in negotiations.

Why Do People Appease? Essentially negotiation is a mix of fighting and cooperation. You have to be able to cooperate to make a relationship work with a significant other but to have your feelings heard in a relationship you sometimes also have to be willing to stick up for what you stand for and also stick up for yourself.

The trick is to find the balance in that, but if you step over other people’s boundaries in a relationship, then in good relationships appeasement works best to mend things.

Not only do you relieve your tensions, but also with others, because it shows you care.

Can Couples Feel Each Other’s Emotions?

Can Couples Feel Each Other’s Emotions?

Emotional connection is sharing a common unspoken language with your significant other.

It’s staying attuned to their needs and problems and following up when you know they’ve got a big interview coming up or just got into a squabble with their mom.

It’s a synergy between two personalities that creates a balance between pushing the other toward growth and remaining a comfortable place to fall.

This type of connection is the glue that holds your relationship together. It’s the X-factor that keeps your bond strong.

It’s trust, understanding and a core component of all types of love. But not every couple has it. Do you? Here are the signs.

You are friends First.

No matter how far your relationship evolves, the foundation of the relationship is a strong friendship.

You humanly respect each other. You value their thoughts. You want their input, and you enjoy their company. If all else was stripped away, and the romantic relationship never existed, you’d still want to know this person and call them a friend.

You develop rapport, inside jokes, and shared experiences.

Can Couples Feel Each Other’s Emotions?

Emotional connection is all about developing a shared experience of the world: going on trips, working on projects, partaking in hobbies, and finding common ground you can refer back to for years.

There’s ease born of these experiences, and they make for the strongest foundation. The more history you have, the more likely you are to have a deep emotional connection.

You talk every day and develop routines.

Can Couples Feel Each Other’s Emotions? An important element of emotional connection is consistency and reliability, which means your partner isn’t going off the grid for long periods or refusing to stay in touch during the day.

You should be able to anticipate hearing from them. They should respond quickly to your contacts. You should talk regularly and see each other often.

You should fall into a normal cadence of when to expect date nights or phone calls; you often develop default plans and warn each other if something changes out of respect.

You can have deep conversations (or just sit in silence).

No, the emotional connection does not always mean you have to talk nonstop; it’s amazing how many people believe that!

More than anything, an emotional connection with your partner is the ability to have deep, substantial conversations about things you’d struggle to talk to just anyone about—feelings, friends, family entanglements, politics, religion, goals and dreams.

On the flip side, those with strong emotional connections can also just enjoy each other’s company and can sit in total silence, comfortably. There’s peace and solace in something as simple as that.

When something major happens—good, or bad—you want to tell them.

When you find out big news like you got a promotion or your grandmother is sick, who do you tell?

If you wouldn’t tell your significant other first, I’d question the strength of that emotional bond. If you have a strong emotional connection to your partner, they are your automatic first call or text. You don’t even think twice. You know everything, moments after it happens.

You don’t withhold crucial information about your life (aka you trust them with secrets).

Can Couples Feel Each Other’s Emotions? If you don’t have a strong emotional connection with your partner, you might withhold from them for a couple of reasons.

One, you may not fully trust them with the information; will they be able to handle it emotionally and be a rock for you?

Will they tell someone else and break your trust? The other problematic reason you may not tell them about important information—like getting into grad school or doing well on a project at work—is because you’re not sure they’d care.

Those with strong emotional connections to their partners always share the big developments and reveal secrets when they matter because they genuinely want to share that with them.

You can be vulnerable with them.

Can you tell your partner about your biggest sexual hang-up? Can you tell them your biggest fear?

Can you break down in front of them without judgment, or let them in on the way anxiety affects your life?

If you have an emotional connection with your partner, you can let your guard down without assuming they’ll believe you’re “too much” or broken.

They meet vulnerability and intimacy with more of the same. Oh, and they let you in on their worries and baggage, too, because we all have some.

You engage in non-intimate touching regularly.

Can Couples Feel Each Other’s Emotions? In couples, all forms of touch are not created equal. Some touch is electric, sensual, full of chemistry and ultimately meant to lead to sex.

But partners with an emotional connection also engage in tons of non-intimate touch, like hand holding, forehead or cheek kisses, back rubs, hugs and other sweet gestures.

This type of touch is nourishing to the relationship in a non-sexual way, helping to maintain a connection with your partner. It’s a silent, significant way of saying, “I’m here with you,” not just “I want you.”

You can predict how they’ll react or behave.

Partners with a strong emotional connection can predict their significant other’s behaviours and reactions because they have a sense of their patterns—what they like to do after work, and how they act when they’re fudging the truth.

This also helps when friends and family members try to plant seeds of doubt about the relationship, which happens to everyone.

If you have an emotional connection and understanding of your partner, you likely have strong, accurate convictions about who they are—positive, and negative, good attributes and flaws—because you know them to their core.

You can both sense when something is wrong.

Those with strong emotional connections are intuitive about their partners. You don’t need your significant other to say, “I had a bad day.”

You know because you see it on their face when they come home from the office. It comes across when they text you short and clipped.

You can tell when their anger is masking hurt and when their defensiveness is born of an old habit they just don’t want to break yet. And you know how to talk to them and deal with them on bad days; they learn the same about you.

How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship?

How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship? Trusting one another and feeling comfortable expressing our feelings is an important part of a healthy relationship.

Emotion is an integral part of being human, and expressing feelings appropriately can deepen and strengthen the relationship you have with your partner or spouse.

Share Positive Feelings Often

Positive feelings like love, appreciation, and happiness are what we all want from a relationship.

Sharing these types of feelings with your partner can strengthen your relationship and increase the love and loyalty you feel for one another.

Make a habit of sharing these types of emotions frequently. You can thank your partner for a particularly nice thing they did, or just express gratitude for the good things they bring to your relationship.

How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship? Learn to tell each other, “I love you” often. Share moments that make you happy and express how glad you are that you get to experience them together.

Share Negative Feelings Carefully

Of course, no relationship is a bed of roses all the time. Negative emotions will come up, and when they do you must be sensitive to your partner when you share them.

If possible, try to let your emotions cool down a little before you give them expression. When you do have to express negative feelings, be specific, and try to phrase them as “I” statements.

How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship? For example, rather than saying, “You always push me away when anything bad happens,” rephrase it as “I feel so isolated when things like this come up.

When you don’t confide in me, I feel like you don’t trust me.” Although you’re expressing the same feelings, a “You” statement can sound accusatory and is likely to provoke a defensive reaction, while an “I” statement focuses on how you feel and invites your partner to respond openly and honestly.

How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship? While the benefits of expressing positive feelings are clear, negative feelings can also provide a great opportunity for the two of you to work through issues together.

Although you may feel that expressing negative feelings will drive you apart, the truth is that appropriately expressing negative feelings can open the door for you and your partner to understand each other better.

Once those feelings are out in the open, you can work together towards solving problems.

How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship? By expressing positive emotions often and appropriately expressing negative feelings when needed, you and your partner can build each other up and grow in your relationship together.

What Makes A Man Feel Connected To A Woman?

What Makes A Man Feel Connected To A Woman? For most women, the hardest part about their love life isn’t meeting or establishing an attraction with men, but rather, it’s creating that deep connection and rush of strong emotions and powerful feelings that move things forward from the casual dating stage toward committed, romantic relationships.

In short, it’s understanding the key factors of how to make a guy fall deeply in love with you by first getting him to become emotionally attached.

This transition can be a pain point for many women who can’t seem to get past the point of casually dating — and who can’t, for the life of them, figure out why.

The reason for this isn’t that men are “commitment-phobes,” as so many would have you believe. Rather, it’s that a guy just hasn’t felt deeply attached to them on an emotional level.

As we all know, physical attraction fades over time, and it’s the quality of our emotional connection with each other — or the lack thereof — that makes or breaks a relationship.

What does it mean to be emotionally attached?

To understand this question you must first know what an emotional attachment is.

Emotional attachment is all about your feelings of closeness and affection in relationships that help them last over time. Emotional attachment is very important in human connection.

How do you know if it’s love or emotional attachment?

Love that’s going to last always will rely on a healthy attachment, however, the two aren’t the same. Love is all about support and mutual giving. you don’t love someone because of what they can do or provide.

The healthy attachment that goes along with love is all about someone who can fulfil your needs for intimacy, companionship, and validation.

How do you know if someone is emotionally attached?

Signs that you could pay attention to are if he genuinely enjoys spending time with you, he is always calling or texting you often, or he’s committed to not seeing other people and being exclusive with you.

Date him for who he is, not for his potential.

Everyone wants to be accepted and loved for who they are, but many women make the mistake of dating a guy for his potential, i.e., the man he could become in five years (with your help, of course).

But men aren’t projects. When you expect a man to change, he feels like you’re not seeing him for who he is. For some men, it could make them feel ashamed like they’re not enough. If a guy feels this at the beginning of a relationship, he’ll likely feel anxious and cut and run.

When I’ve asked happily married men what it was about their wife that made them think, “Yes, she’s the one,” they’ve often said something along the lines of, “She never tried to change me.”

Create emotional safety for him.

How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship? Creating emotional safety means creating a space where someone can express their thoughts, feelings, and desires without feeling judged.

When men refer to a woman as being easy to talk to, they mean that they’re able to say things they typically wouldn’t share with anyone else, because they know they won’t be made to feel judged.

The next time your man is having a bad day, complaining about his frustration with a colleague, or telling you something personal, listen to him without judgment.

Know when to fix a problem, when to offer help, and when to simply listen. Sometimes people don’t want their problems fixed, they just want someone to hear them out and for them to feel secure with you.

How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship? Keep things light and playful.

People remember you based on the experiences you share. The more positive and fun experiences you share, the more someone associates those feelings with you.

Men and women have different relationship timelines. Women tend to jump into relationships, eager to define their status and skip over many of the fun aspects of dating, while men often take a little longer to decide if they want to pursue the relationship further.

It’s important to keep the beginning of a relationship light and playful, because to a guy, even if he likes you, you’re still just dating.

How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship? Be vulnerable.

The fastest way to create emotional intimacy with someone is to drop your guard and show your vulnerability.

When you show someone an unfiltered version of yourself, you’re essentially giving them the key to exploring every intimate detail about you, and that’s a huge responsibility.

Think of what it feels like when you’ve gained someone’s trust like that. Incredible right?

When you show people your vulnerability, you create emotional safety for a guy to do the same.

How Do Emotions Show In A Relationship? Give him space to chase you.

One of the most common scenarios I get asked about is what to do when a guy stops chasing you.

The answer is often, “Do nothing.”

When you’re in panic mode, you approach things from a place of fear. I see many women who panic as soon as they think a guy is pulling away.

They panic when a guy doesn’t text or call one day, or if he seems a little distant at dinner.

Scared that their man is pulling away, they will overcompensate for his aloofness by trying to take control of the relationship.

They’ll start calling the guy, make all the plans, and generally attempt to lead the relationship where they want it to go.

When this happens, it causes a role reversal, and without either one consciously realizing it happens, the guy becomes the one being chased.

This shift in dynamic is one many men aren’t comfortable with, and so when faced with this situation, they tend to withdraw even more.

Give the guy you’re falling for the space to chase you.

When you create a life you love, you create a life he wants to be part of.

What Does Lack Of Affection Do To A Woman?

What Does Lack Of Affection Do To A Woman? Humans are wired to give and receive affection. It’s how we bond as a social species. Affectionate behaviour makes the recipient of that behaviour feel seen, validated, wanted and loved.

Physical affection is a major component of affectionate behaviour. Although, one can also give affection verbally in the form of praise, appreciation, confessing feelings, etc.

Physical affection is all about touch. Humans use touch as an essential tool to give and receive affection. Examples of affectionate behaviours involving physical contact include:

Holding hands
Hugging
Cuddling
Massaging
Caressing
Stroking
Kissing
Sex

Touching reduces stress and releases the hormone oxytocin that facilitates the formation of an emotional bond between the touchers.

It is common in relationships, that when a couple has been together for quite a while, they can feel very comfortable and forget the key aspects of courtship and affection.

When we are first dating, there is often more attention placed on demonstrating affection. Once there is a comfort level established, it is common to not place as much effort into showing your partner affection.

This is not necessarily due to not desiring your partner, but simply due to feeling very comfortable and not putting forth the same amount of effort and attention.

We must be continuously making that effort and putting forth time and dedication to our partnership as it is a key to happiness and relationship satisfaction.

For many people, showing affection is a very intimate act and when someone is feeling fearful or closed off to intimacy, then they will avoid initiating any affection altogether.

This could be due to something that has happened to them previously, in other relationships, or even in childhood.

The person may be more closed off and resistant to physical affection or even emotional vulnerability.

People can often put up emotional barriers or walls to prevent being too open or vulnerable with someone else.

This is an issue that is about them, their comfort level with intimacy and not their partner.

It can be difficult for many people to show affection and not because they don’t want to, but because it is very uncomfortable and difficult for them to do so.

Often, when we get caught up in focusing on other areas of our life, such as work, school, or social aspects, then we can unintentionally neglect other aspects of our life.

This may not be due to not desiring our partner or the relationship, but simply because our attention is focused elsewhere.

It is common that if one partner has something major happening in their life that is taking their full focus or creating high levels of stress, such as a major work project, then they can get off balance and “forget” to demonstrate affection with their partner.

It takes having a healthy balance and putting your partner and relationship as a priority to maintain physical affection, intimacy, and connection in the partnership.

Lack of affection

Since affection is a basic human need, a lack of it is bound to cause problems. Receiving the attention and affection of parents and other primary caregivers is crucial for the healthy development of children.

This need for affection persists into adulthood when adults form relationships with other adults.

Does lack of affection affect women differently than men?

Both men and women desire affection in their intimate relationships. Both men and women engage in touching behaviours in their close relationships.

But…

Women seem to have a greater desire for giving and receiving affection than men. This is evidenced by the fact that men tend to express affection less often than women.

There’s a limit to the number of physical contact men engage in with other men. If they do it too much, it becomes weird. They’re accused of being gay.

Women, in contrast, can get away with much physical affection without being judged. They’re often seen hugging and kissing their female friends.

One reason for this may be that society is more tolerant of female than male homosexuality.

Another reason could be that men are not into physical affection as much as women are. They’re much more interested in sex, even if they get it devoid of any affection (think hookers).

I’ve never come across a man complaining that he isn’t getting enough attention and affection in his relationship.

Furthermore, women are more touch-sensitive and relationship-oriented than men are.

All these things point to a woman’s greater need for physical affection.

Effects of lack of affection on women

First, let’s look at the general effects of the lack of affection of people. Then, we’ll narrow down how it affects women in particular.

Research has linked a lack of affection in adults to stress, depression, and worse health.1

People who lack affection in their intimate relationships are likely to suffer from:

Reduced overall happiness

Loneliness

Lower relationship satisfaction

Mood and anxiety disorders

Secondary immune disorders

Alexithymia

Anxious attachment style

Since women crave affection more, the above problems get magnified in them. Plus, they experience additional issues that men don’t.

Let’s dive into the different ways women get affected by a lack of affection in their close relationships:

What Does Lack Of Affection Do To A Woman? Feeling empty

A woman’s life revolves around her emotions. She feels empty when she can’t express her feelings, good or bad.

Her life loses colour without emotions. Lack of affection in a relationship makes the relationship lifeless for a woman.

What Does Lack Of Affection Do To A Woman? Feeling lonely

Since affection is the primary basis on which women bond, not having affection in their relationships makes women feel disconnected and lonely.

For a woman, a lonely relationship is one where she feels unseen, unheard, and invalidated.

Men, in contrast, can bond over simple things like sports. They don’t require affection to bond.

What Does Lack Of Affection Do To A Woman? Depression

Depression is usually the result of consistently failing to solve a major life problem. Unlike men, lack of affection can be a significant life problem for women.

What Does Lack Of Affection Do To A Woman? Loss of self-esteem

This is a big one.

Unlike men, women’s self-worth tends to be tied to the quality of their relationships.

This is why you often see women posting pictures of their close relatives and friends on social media. And why do you see them posting pictures with babies and pets?

I’ve even seen career-oriented women do this, which tells me they identify more with their affectionate relationships than their careers.

This doesn’t mean they don’t think their careers are unimportant, just that their self-esteem is not as tied to their careers as it is to their relationships.

A high-quality relationship is overflowing with affection. A low-quality relationship lacking affection lowers the self-esteem of women.

Why?

The same reason why being financially unsuccessful lowers the self-esteem of men. Being financially successful helps men say:

“Look! I can provide resources.”

Being able to provide resources is an attractive trait for men to have in the sexual marketplace.

When women boast about the quality of their relationships, they’re essentially saying:

“Look! I can bond well. I can bond well with children and other cute, little things. I can be a good mother.

The Appeaser In Relationships Conclusion

The Appeaser In Relationships Conclusion. I feel a person can be strong with a unique personality when not constantly pandering to others.

It’s better to be alone and focus on goals than to be aloof one-upping everybody in a group-think mentality that goes nowhere.

The Appeaser In Relationships Conclusion. because we are insecure within ourselves. The fear of losing someone in our lives, even if they are toxic to us, will drive our need to appease them.

Further reading

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