Why He’s Gone Posted byMiss Date Doctor September 2, 2022 Table of Contents hide 1 Why He’s Gone 1.1 Why Does A Guy Disappear? 1.2 Why Do Guys Come On Strong Then Disappear? 1.3 Why Do Guys Disappear Then Come Back? 1.4 Why Do Guys Go Hot And Cold? 1.5 Why He’s Gone PDF 1.6 When He Disappears Let Him Go 1.7 What To Text Him When He Disappears 1.8 Why Do Guys Disappear When They Like You? 1.9 When A Guy Disappears For A Week 1.10 He Disappeared And Came Back 1.11 Why Guys Disappear Then Come Back 1.12 When A Man Disappears Without An Explanation 1.12.1 Why He’s Gone Conclusion 1.13 Further reading Why He’s Gone Why he’s gone. Rejection is one thing, but mixed signals are worse. Let me explain… When a guy is into you and everything’s going well, you can see all the signs that a real relationship could occur. That’s why it can be so upsetting and confusing when he suddenly disappears… Reasons why he’s gone. When they just want sex The cliche that most guys just want sex isn’t always true. It’s the case that many men have a strong sexual focus and enjoy sex. Still, the idea that “all” men are out there hunting endless bed buddies is incorrect. What is true, however, is that some men are. If they weren’t, then the stereotype wouldn’t exist. This list should start with this because it’s definitely one of the most common reasons guys act interested but then disappear: They just want some nookie. Sorry to say it, but the truth is better than sugar-coating it. And the fact is that in some cases the guy who was so “into” you was just adding a notch to his bedpost. why he’s gone. He finds you boring This relates to reason one, and it’s quite common. One of the top reasons guys act interested but then disappear is that a guy tries to pressure himself to be into you but ultimately just isn’t feeling it. He recently met another woman who’s not as “hot,” but who stimulates him far more in terms of his sense of humour and intellect. And the truth is that a smart and creative guy will lose interest in most women if they don’t emotionally or mentally stimulate him. This doesn’t necessarily mean you’re “boring,” but it can mean that he got bored of you and felt you weren’t a match. It sucks, but it happens far more than most dating guides would like you to admit. When you haven’t made them feel like a hero One of the most common reasons guys act interested but then disappear has to do with the deepest roots of male psychology and biology. There’s a little-known concept that makes a guy want to commit or scramble and run. This relates to how you make him feel. You see, for guys, it’s all about triggering their inner hero. And it’s something most women don’t know anything about. Once triggered, these drivers make men into the heroes of their own lives. They feel better, love harder, and commit stronger when they find someone who knows how to trigger it. Now, you may be wondering why it’s called “the hero instinct”? Do guys need to feel like superheroes to commit to a woman? Not at all. Forget about Marvel. You won’t need to play the damsel in distress or buy your man a cape. The truth is, it comes at no cost or sacrifice to you. With only a few small changes in how you approach him, you’ll tap into a part of him no woman has tapped into before. Why Does A Guy Disappear? Why Does A Guy Disappear? Many people come and go in your life. You should cherish the ones that stay. However, of all the people that left is sometimes the one you expect to stay because you love them. Well, what can you do if they decide to do so? Your crush suddenly disappeared last week yet you don’t know the reason. You live your life normally and you both are completely fine. That is why you’ve been wondering what happens, what makes them just disappear like that. You Are Not Official Dating You don’t need to worry if that guy disappears or you don’t have the right to worry because you both are not officially dating though. However, we know you are still going to think about what the reason is. Then, you need to deal with it since you are the only one that cares. Why Does A Guy Disappear? He Doesn’t Care About Getting A Relationship When a guy disappears, it means they don’t want to be in that situation or even a relationship. He probably doesn’t care about getting one for all of the reasons that he only had. He Busy With Work You don’t need to overthink it. He might be busy with his work and doesn’t have time for you at the moment. You Are Not His Priority Well, wait, there is no such thing as a busy person in this world because it is only a matter of priorities. If they just disappear and are busy with their stuff, then it is simply because you are not his highest priority. Why he’s gone. He Has Another Girl Put you in the lowest priority, it could mean that he has another girl beside you. Well, it doesn’t matter though since you aren’t dating in the first place. He Needs Time To Think Why Does A Guy Disappear? The reason for his sudden disappearance maybe because he needs time to think about what happened between you two. He wants to make sure of his feelings about you so he won’t hurt you in the end. Even though by doing this he already hurt you. He Has Family Problem Remember that family comes first. He might be in the middle of a family problem so he puts that first and leaves out the relationship thingy. He Is Not Ready For Commitment A boy is a boy. Sometimes, it takes a long time for a boy to get ready for a serious commitment. If you were talking about getting a serious relationship, maybe it annoyed him and that is the reason for their disappearance. He Is Not Into You Why do guys disappear for days and what to do to deal with it? It is because he is not that into you. Don’t expect too much from a guy that disappears without notice. Why Do Guys Come On Strong Then Disappear? Why Do Guys Come On Strong Then Disappear? This is one of the most aggravating things about dating. Things are going great. You enjoy each other’s company and look forward to seeing him. He seems to get you, which feels great. While getting to know each other, you are having so much fun! Then he pulls away and you are left wondering what the heck happened. You examine every conversation looking for something you said or did wrong. You blame yourself even if you can’t find anything to point to that would cause this. Why Do Guys Come On Strong Then Disappear? There are as many reasons for this behaviour as there are men who do it. But I’m going to share seven of the biggest reasons with you below. Dating Other Women When you first start seeing a guy and you’ve only had a few dates, assume he’s seeing other women. This could be exactly why he disappeared – he got interested in or distracted by someone else. If you’ve only had a few dates it can be a disappointment, but not that big a deal. Don’t let yourself get too invested in a man you’ve seen just 2-4 times. Hopefully, you know how to avoid premature attachment to men you are still getting over 6-10 weeks. Not Happy with Himself When a man is not happy with himself, his life, or his career, he just can’t make you his main priority. Being unsettled creates a feeling of not being a good “provider” which gets in the way of building a strong relationship with men. Unfortunately, this is not something you can help a man get through. He has to find his way and this is a reason why a man might disappear. Why he’s gone. Doesn’t Want a Relationship Some guys know they do not want a relationship. They don’t want ties, expectations, or the responsibility of being attached to a woman. It could feel like a giant weight hanging around his neck, holding him back from what he knows he needs to do. Don’t feel offended – this is not about you. It’s all him baby. Needs Healing after Divorce or Breakup You may think that you’ve met a great guy that needs help getting over his ex. DON’T GET SUCKED IN! You might help him recover, but then 99.99% of men will skip out and move on to the next relationship. Happens all the time. This is because you remind him of a painful time when he was weak and needed help and so he wants to give himself as much space from that AND you as possible. That’s the thanks you’ll get for helping him. Don’t try to trade your nurturing for his love because you will not be rewarded. Prefers to Keep It Casual All men are not relationships ready. Some don’t want to get serious so they keep things casual. It’s easier and they avoid getting entangled in something demanding or restricting. When you are in a relationship you have to consider the other person’s feelings, wants, and desires. On the other hand, when casual – anything goes. There are no rules. Why Do Guys Come On Strong Then Disappear? Not Sure How He Feels If you’ve been seeing a guy for several weeks and everything is going beautifully, then he suddenly disappears, there’s one more possible reason. He’s not sure how he feels about you. A lot of men need space to figure out emotional issues. This is where talk of the ‘Man Cave’ comes in. They retreat to gain strength. Now if he comes back in a week, that’s good news. He may have decided to move forward with you and your relationship. Why Do Guys Disappear Then Come Back? Why Do Guys Disappear Then Come Back? Not everything is always black and white, especially when it comes to male-female relationships. We are wired differently. That’s why we fail to understand each other’s behaviour from time to time. But why men pull disappearing acts and then try to come back defies logic. Why Do Guys Disappear Then Come Back? The first thing that comes to mind is that they are players. Still, it might not be all that simple. Sometimes there are other reasons than them playing the field and seeing other women. Even though that’s the most probable reason and the one that makes the most sense, there are always exceptions to the rule. See what else might be the cause of a man’s disappearance and reappearance in your life? He still hasn’t figured out how he feels about you You see men also have things they have to figure out in their heads before they are even ready for a meaningful relationship. They take a step back to gain a perspective and some space to think things through. Yes, I know that the righteous ones will say: “When you know you know. What’s there to think about?” But sometimes there are a lot of things to think about. You never know what’s going on in somebody’s head or how their mind works. If you think this is the cause, the worst thing you can do is chase after him or demand an immediate explanation. It can only make him more doubtful and run in a different direction even faster. Give him the space he wants to think things through. Play it cool even though it’s going to be extremely hard. But don’t tolerate him coming in and out of your life as many times he wants. His disappearing and coming back is more than you bargained for, and you are super understanding for tolerating it the first time around. He’s developed real feelings for you, and it freaked him out He might have started a relationship with you and thought of going one day at a time without any clear goal of where it might lead. But once he got to know you better, once he opened up to you and let you in, it made him vulnerable, and it made him so scared that he freaked out and left. There might be issues he is dealing with, his insecurities or fears that drove him to act stupidly. If he is just scared, he may be worthy of a second chance. But if he is doing this for some other reason, wave him goodbye. Why he’s gone. Things are moving a bit too fast You and your man might not be on the same page right from the start. While he decided to go one step at a time, you are already in too deep. The opposite scenario is possible, too. His disappearing on you might be his subconscious attempt to slow things down. He was overwhelmed by how things were going, and he probably started feeling trapped. If you believe this is the cause, let him breathe and have his space. Slow things down a bit and follow his pace. Relationships need to be built brick by brick, and skipping steps is never a good option. In case he disappears again, let him go, but this time for good. If you also made an effort to take things slow, there is no reason to allow him to treat you like that. Why Do Guys Disappear Then Come Back? He has trust issues Not all women are saints, and not all men are devils. He might have been involved with someone who has left him emotionally devastated. If he leaves then comes back again and you are well aware of his past, the odds are he developed trust issues that are preventing him from letting you in and forming a relationship with you. Although you can understand or relate to where he’s coming from, you can’t keep turning the switch off and on in your heart. Try openly talking to him, and tell him that you shouldn’t pay for somebody else’s mistakes. If he disappears again, I’m afraid there is nothing you can do. He has to deal with his trust issues. Why he’s gone. He has a commitment phobia It seems like these days every other guy has a commitment phobia. They are just not ready for a relationship. They fear it will trap them and limit all their freedoms. They might be immature. Having responsibilities and being devoted to just one woman is not for them. If he fears commitment, there is nothing you can do about it. There is no point in welcoming him back the first time when there is a sure chance that he will just do it again. Why he’s gone. He is not sure if the two of you can work Sometimes the love mist gets so thick that you can’t see things. Take a step back and see the big picture. Do you belong in each other’s lives? It doesn’t have to be anybody’s fault. It’s just that you aren’t compatible, and his attempt to get back into your life might be just about making sure that he hasn’t made a mistake when he disappeared for the first time. Why Do Guys Go Hot And Cold? Why Do Guys Go Hot And Cold? Is there anything more unsettling and frustrating? You’re seeing a guy, everything seems to be going great, he seems super into you and then he’s not. Something suddenly shifts. You try not to worry too much, but you can’t help but wonder what you may have done. But then he’s back like nothing ever happened. And just when you’re getting comfortable, he disappears again. Or he shuts down. Or he withdraws. You have no idea where he stands. Is he into you or not? Some days it seems like he is, other days he acts like you’re some sort of nuisance. Some days he’s warm, affectionate, and sweet, other days he shuts you out in the cold and leaves you shivering from his icy behaviour. Here are some of the reasons why he’s acting the way he is: Why Do Guys Go Hot And Cold? He Struggles With Something Outside of the Relationship Men are the opposite of us. They don’t become emotional nor need to talk to ten friends when they have struggles in life. They usually choose to solve their issues internally, and most of the time, that means withdrawing from the relationship without any explanation. Again, don’t blame it on yourself. Men deal with personal issues differently than we do as women. It doesn’t mean he won’t ever share his feelings. He simply needs time to figure things out on his own and may get back to you after the storm is over. He Is Slowing Things Down With You One of the reasons why men go hot and cold is to slow things down. When they’re in love at the beginning and your relationship starts with the speed of light, it feels all nice, right? But truth be told, the speed cannot be sustained long-term, and one or both of you know that something there’s not right. It’s unhealthy to begin a relationship too fast if you know what I mean. You’ve probably experienced this before yourself: a guy comes on strong, and it feels nice to have all this attention from him. But those guys burn out fast. And that’s why you should always be worried when men come on strong. Why Do Guys Go Hot And Cold? He Doesn’t Like You Enough Ouch! There is no other way to say this, but it’s better to face it sooner than later. It’s the worst scenario we can imagine, but sometimes it’s the reality. And that’s ok. No matter how hot you are, some men just won’t “get” you, nor value your presence in their life. It’s not you – it’s them. Yes, he finds you attractive, yes he thinks you’re awesome, and yes you share the same values, but he is not completely into you. Why is that? He just can’t see a future with you. He might think that you are a great person, but maybe he doesn’t fully get some of your personality traits. He Is Keeping The Ball in His Court Now we’re talking about the super-controlling guy. You might be shocked, but one of the reasons why men go hot and cold is to make you want them more. It’s frustrating, I know. But it happens too often. The thing is that this guy knows how much you like him, and he’s now going to be mean by playing hot and cold, but much more towards the icy edge. He’s ruling his game, and he can tell that he’s driving you crazy. He enjoys it. You are skyrocketing his ego, and he feels good about himself. So, he won’t just up and leave you completely. But you won’t be happy with him in your life either. He knows that the colder he goes, the more you’ll chase him and want him to be hot. His behaviour makes you want him even more, but where are your limits? How far can you go to get his attention? Be aware that once he gets full control over you, it’s hard to get the ball in your court again. He Is Only Hot When He Wants Sex From You Let’s face this one too. Men are the sweetest, loving creatures when they want to get laid. Why men go hot and cold is not as hard to reveal when we talk about their sexual attraction towards you. When he wants to have sex with you, he is the most attentive, caring, and loving gentleman, but he turns cold immediately when he needs to invest more into your relationship. It’s brutal, but this is one of the most common scenarios that we have to deal with. It almost feels like you are not talking about the same guy, right? When he wants to get physical nearness, he is your prince charming, and when you are asking him for a commitment, then he’s ghosting you. Why He’s Gone PDF Why He’s Gone PDF. He kissed you passionately after date two. He said he had a great time, you’re beautiful, smart, sexy, and amazing, and he’ll call you soon. And you wait for that phone call. A week goes by. Cue crickets… You’re left scratching your head. Is it me? Did I say or do something to turn him off? Was I a bad kisser? You probably don’t want to know why he didn’t call again. Would it make you feel better if you knew he disappeared because he’s not divorced? How about if you knew he made out with three other women that week and whispered the same sweet nothings in their ears? Sometimes, you just don’t want to know. You mustn’t take the vanishing man personally. Let go and move on. It often has nothing to do with you. But sometimes it is about you. You may have said or done something on a date that turned off a good guy. I want you to find love. So, here are the top ten reasons why men disappear. Why He’s Gone PDF. He doesn’t want to hurt your feelings. Maybe he thinks if he tells you why he thinks you’re not a good match, you’ll get upset. Most guys would rather say nothing than hurt your feelings and have to deal with your emotions in the aftermath. Why he’s gone. He’s shallow. Maybe he’s looking for someone with a bigger butt, blonder hair, or someone more sexually available. Would you want him to share that with you? Some things are better left unsaid… Do you want to hear “It’s not you? Is it me?” Men are tired of saying it, and you’re sick of hearing it. In today’s world of texting, sexting, and Facebook status updates, communication has become a lost art for many. It’s easier to say nothing than feel like a cliché. He wants to be Mr. Nice guy. If he says nothing about why he left, he might feel like you’ll still see him as a nice guy, even if he made false promises and created the illusion that he was very interested in you. Why he’s gone. You seem unstable to him. Most men don’t want to feel responsible for a woman who seems emotionally unstable. You may have said or done something that gave him that impression. Maybe you were overly reactive about something during dinner? Did you bash your ex? If you are a stable woman, think about what you might have said to give him that impression. Why He’s Gone PDF. The Man Pause By the way, I’m specifically talking about the dating phase, – not about when a guy disappears in a relationship. It’s NOT uncommon for men to take a pause and consider a long-term relationship with you. Let’s say things are going well. You guys are hitting it off. And then, out of nowhere his communication pattern with you changes. He may communicate significantly less or not at all. Understand that this is just a man’s pause. It’s not a reason to lose your mind. When a guy goes into man pause, he needs a minute – a minute (which can be a day or a week)- just to consider whether or not he sees you two long term.No need to freak out. When He Disappears Let Him Go When He Disappears Let Him Go. When he disappears, let him go and focus on yourself and your own life instead of what might have been with him. When he disappears, it’s tempting to run after him and beg him to come back. But it’s not healthy for you or the relationship to try to control his actions and his life. When He Disappears Let Him Go. If a man is pulling away from you, it may feel counterintuitive to do nothing. Don’t try to talk him out of his decision. Instead of fighting his emotional distance or reasoning with him, be respectful and let him go. Even if you’re sure that he loves you and wants to come back; even if he says he will; even if he admits that he made a mistake. When He Disappears Let Him Go. Even if it hurts like hell when a man pulls away, let him go… at least for now. The more you push, the more distant he’ll get. The more distant he gets, the harder it’ll be to win him back later on. You can wait for love, but don’t chase after someone who’s given up on you. It’s not worth your time or energy, and it won’t make them want you any more than they already did before they left in the first place. Be comfortable with your decision It’s important to remember that every relationship is different and therefore requires a different approach. The real secret here is to pay attention and understand how he communicates his needs to you; when he disappears let him go physically, mentally, and emotionally. If you get too worried about why he’s pulling away from you in the first place, it might be too late to react when he comes back around. When a man pulls away, let him go…but only if you know deep down that’s what you want. Move on When he disappears from your life without explanation or reason, do not try to find him. When he walks away, let him go. If he wants you back, he’ll come back when you least expect it. If you chase after him, it sends a message that you are desperate and clingy—not qualities guys want in their girlfriends. By trying to win back his attention or forgiveness when he pulls away, all you do is push him further away. When you let someone go with dignity and grace they feel free to come back into your life when they are ready—and they’ll be much more willing to commit than if they were forced into returning because of how desperate you appeared by chasing them down and cornering them until they gave in. What To Text Him When He Disappears What To Text Him When He Disappears. When a guy suddenly goes missing from your life, you want to find out what to text him when he disappears. Is there a message fit for the occasion that will make him realize he’s made a mistake? It’s never easy figuring out that a guy who had great potential to be your boyfriend ends up MIA. Two days ago, you had the time of your life hanging out with him and now, it feels like he doesn’t live on planet earth anymore. So, instead of enjoying your life, you’re wondering what you should text him to let him know that his behaviour isn’t right. Do you accuse him straight away? Do you rant to him about his immature behaviour or do you simply give him some more time and wait for him to come back to you? Expose him He’s well aware of his behaviour. He knows that what he’s doing is wrong but he doesn’t want to stop since he doesn’t think that you have seen through him. So, if you’re trying to figure out what to text him when he disappears, you can always choose to be direct and blunt. Expose him and let him realize that you know what’s going on. It’s way too obvious that he’s ghosting you on purpose and you want to get answers. In this case, you can text him something like this. Hey, I just realized that I haven’t heard back from you in a while and I’m a bit confused. I know that we had a great time hanging out but I also know how tricky it can be for guys when they realize they’re catching feelings or when they want different things. “So, I just want to make sure whether we’re on the same page. I appreciate it when guys can admit that they’re not into the relationship. Your honesty could save us a lot of time and energy so it would be great if you could just tell me what’s going on.” When you text him something like this, he may feel the need to finally be honest with you. Ask him directly how he feels about the two of you Just because he beats around the bush and doesn’t want to be honest with you, it doesn’t mean that you’re supposed to act the same way. When he’s avoiding the truth, you can directly ask him about it. So, what to text him when he vanishes from your life without giving you any explanation? Well, what about something like this: What To Text Him When He Disappears. “I had a great time hanging out with you but I just want to be sure that you feel the same way about me. I would love to spend more time with you to see how we get along but if that’s not a part of your plan, then I don’t want to waste my time.” Reading this message will probably make him reply to you. But if he’s a complete douche who doesn’t care about your feelings at all, then you shouldn’t be surprised if you still don’t hear back from him. At least you’ll know it’s time for you to completely give up on this thing between you, as all of the waiting probably won’t get you anywhere. What To Text Him When He Disappears.“Hey, I hope you’re doing okay since I haven’t heard back from you. Everything was going great until one point when you decided to ghost me. That’s why I want you to know that I have certain expectations when it comes to dating. I’m looking for someone who’s okay with regular communication and who won’t keep disappearing from my life whenever he gets scared. If that’s not something you can deliver then we should end our story here. You can’t give me what I want the same way I can’t tolerate what you expect me to. That’s why it will be best to go our separate ways if we realize that we’re not a match.” Why Do Guys Disappear When They Like You? Why Do Guys Disappear When They Like You? Guys will ditch women they like if they like someone else better. They’ll do it if they’re in a ‘player phase’ too. It could also be that something you did turned him off, or that he has an avoidant attachment style. We’ll explore these reasons, plus a few more, more deeply in the article below. Why Do Guys Disappear When They Like You? Here are the most common reasons why a man would stop contacting a woman, even if he likes her. He’s in His Player Phase Men will go through phases where they’d much rather have multiple one-night stands than settle down into a monogamous relationship. For some guys, this ‘phase’ might last throughout their 20s, 30s, and beyond. Indeed, now that dating apps and social media have made it so much easier to line up dates, there are high-value guys out there on a mission to pump and dump hundreds of women a year. On the other end of the spectrum, there are also heartbroken guys fresh out of a relationship, who aren’t ready for a relationship and just want to have some fun. There are also dudes living in your city for just a few more weeks. Even if these guys like you, something in their brains will tell them to move on to the next conquest. Something Turned Him Off Love, in a romantic sense anyway, is conditional. So, it’s possible that something happened to change his mind about you. It could be that he really liked you when you last met for a date but has since discovered something that turned him off. Maybe he’s been stalking your online profiles and found something he didn’t like. Perhaps one of your mutual friends has revealed something about your past. Maybe you said or did something on your last date that was a major red flag in his mind. He Likes Someone Else Better In 2022, it’s common for single men and women to date multiple people at the same time. So, even if a guy says he likes you, there’s every chance he also likes someone else. At some point, it could be that he decides he likes his number one girl enough to cut contact with everyone else. He found his Miss Right and it wasn’t you. This is the dating game we’re playing nowadays, and it is a more efficient way to find your perfect partner, so perhaps you should be doing the same. Of course, it could be something simpler like his ex-girlfriend coming back into the picture, or that his high school crush suddenly became single. Either way, be aware of the possibility that you’re not his number one woman anymore, and perhaps you never were. Why Do Guys Disappear When They Like You? He’s an Avoidant There are three attachment styles: healthy, anxious, and avoidant. People with the avoidant attachment style become distant and may break all contact when they begin to experience strong romantic feelings. This is because they have a fear of intimacy, most likely caused by a traumatic experience with an ex-partner or even with their parents. The good news is: that, unlike the previous three scenarios, it is possible to reel an avoidant back in. You just need to give him the appropriate space, move things forward slowly, and not spook him with any grand gestures of love just yet. An avoidant is a type to run away from any signs of clinginess. He’s Just Busy Everyone’s attached to their smartphones these days, and it has become normal to expect a response to our messages within 24 hours. But not everyone is complying with these unwritten rules. If this guy is particularly busy with work, studies, or a personal tragedy, he might be putting all romantic pursuits on hold. He’s Waiting For You to Show Some Enthusiasm If a guy says he likes you, but you’ve not reciprocated his enthusiasm, he could take that as a cue to search for love somewhere else. Perhaps he thinks he’s laid his cards on the table and now he’s waiting for you to show him how you feel. He may think that making any further moves to pursue you will just drive you further away. In such a case, it’s likely that he’s waiting for you to push things forward and show that you’re excited about developing something with him. When A Guy Disappears For A Week When A Guy Disappears For A Week. You’ve met a great guy, things seem to be going well. Then suddenly he disappears. Only to pop back up a week later with no explanation at all. Here’s exactly what to do when he reappears after disappearing. Get Grounded When A Guy Disappears For A Week. He’s gone, you feel like you’ve accepted it and are ready to move on. Then ping, and you get that text. Your heart leaps. He’s back! He does want me! At this point, it’s always a good idea to stay calm and grounded. If your head is spinning, don’t send a reply just yet. Take a moment to get centred and check in with yourself. Get Clear On What You Want Once you’re feeling centred, present, and calm, take a moment to ask yourself how you feel about the situation and him. Does this guy fit your idea of an emotionally mature man? What are the chances he’d do this again? Does this man have the ability to form a long-term, healthy and stable relationship? Is he worth your time? (Spoiler alert, 95% of the time he is not worth it). At this point, you may decide any number of things. When A Guy Disappears For A Week. You may choose to give him the benefit of the doubt. You may decide that you can do better, but still want some sort of closure. Or you may choose to ignore him together. Communicate With Confidence If you’ve decided that you want to text him back. Then it’s important to respond to his text in a manner that’s calm and positive, but highly assertive. Keep in mind that a reply that you might think is cute and cheeky, is usually perceived as more passive-aggressive. And rarely comes across the way you intend. Whatever your end game is, remember this you’ll catch more flies with honey. Don’t Act as if Nothing Happened I know many women who are afraid to ask big questions or to say how they are feeling to a man. They worry that if they don’t hold back, he’ll just leave again. I have even heard a few dating coaches recommend that if you like the guy just act like “nothing happened”. Because you’ll only create drama and chase him away. He Disappeared And Came Back He Disappeared And Came Back. When a guy you liked ends up distancing himself from you, you might end up feeling hurt, frustrated, and sad. But it can be even more confusing if he comes back, seemingly interested in you again. You’re probably wondering “What does he want with me?” We’ve got you covered with this guide on how to respond when he comes back after pulling away. He Disappeared And Came Back. Ask him why he pulled away. You deserve to have your emotions respected, and therefore you deserve an explanation for why he pulled away. This can give you a better understanding of his motivations for coming back—whether he wants something with you, he’s just feeling lonely, or he still doesn’t know what he wants. Take some time to check in with yourself. It’s okay to not respond immediately after he reaches out—if he’s interested, he’ll understand and be there when you’re ready. It’s better not to give him the impression that you’ve been waiting around for him. Instead, take some time to practice self-care so that you can approach the relationship in the healthiest frame of mind possible. Self-care looks like a lot of different things to different people. Make sure you’re staying active, sleeping and eating well, and taking time to do things for yourself. You might also want to try meditation or mindfulness exercises, which can strengthen your emotional self-regulation. He Disappeared And Came Back. Let him know if you’re not interested. If you end up feeling like this relationship isn’t one you want to pursue, that’s okay—he might’ve missed the boat. Send him a brief and kind message saying that you’re not interested in taking things further. Why Guys Disappear Then Come Back Why Guys Disappear Then Come Back. When a man disappears without a Sometimes, things are going well with a man, until he suddenly disappears on you. You try to move on, but weeks later he suddenly comes back into your life. What is the reason behind this behaviour? Let’s discuss some of them: Why Guys Disappear Then Come Back. He may be cheating on you Another reason a man might disappear and then come back to you is that he is cheating on you. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that all men cheat on women or want to cheat on women. I am just saying if a man suddenly disappears from your life and then comes back, he might be doing something else with another woman. If you suspect your boyfriend is cheating on you, you should confront him about his behaviour and ask him why he has been acting like this lately. Maybe you are way off and his reason for disappearing and reappearing is completely different, but talking to him honestly will give you some clarity. And if he did cheat? It’s a good idea to talk about the cheating behaviour and see if he is willing to change. If he is unwilling to change, it might be best for you both to end the relationship and try again in the future. Dealing with someone who cheated on you will be hard work. Unless you have a really strong foundation and lots of love for each other, it will be impossible to heal from this. Even the most loving relationships struggle when trying to heal from cheating, so really think about whether or not it’s worth it for you. Why Guys Disappear Then Come Back. He needs validation This is another prime reason a guy might disappear and then come back to you: he needs validation. Validation is something every human wants and needs, there’s no secret about that. A man who can’t get his needs met, will often find a way to be around you to feel validated. And that’s where he’ll disappear for a few days and then reappear again. If this is the case, I would suggest you start talking about these issues with him if you’ve been together for a while. You should be able to talk about these things openly with each other and see if any underlying issues might be causing him to disappear when he feels like he doesn’t have any validation. Otherwise, I would consider ending things with him because what he’s doing is not healthy and it will only end up hurting both of you in the long run. But his need for validation might not be the reason he is leaving, it could also be the reason he is coming back out of the blue! Perhaps he was living his life, minding his own business and then he suddenly felt the urge to be validated. Now, what is a better validation than to hit you up again and have you respond right away, even though he disappeared from your life? If this is the case, I think it would be best if you end things with him because he’s not thinking clearly. When A Man Disappears Without An Explanation When A Man Disappears Without An Explanation. If you stay in the dating game long enough, it’s only a matter of time until you’re ghosted. Like it or not, this has become a common practice in modern dating. More times than not, guys are the ones ghosting women. While I don’t condone such behaviour, I can shed some light on the reasons why guys will suddenly ghost you or disappear from your life without a word HE’S SEEING SOMEONE ELSE. It sounds simple, but it’s one of the most obvious reasons why a guy would ghost you. The problem is that it’s not always easy to tell if he’s seeing someone else or just keeping his options open. When A Man Disappears Without An Explanation. If he’s dating multiple women and decides to get serious with one of the other ones he’s seeing, you may not hear from him again. For what it’s worth, it’s not always intentional; it just happens when he goes in another direction. HE DOESN’T WANT A COMMITMENT. Sorry, but not all guys are looking for something serious when they start dating someone. Most can also sense when things are starting to head that way. If we think that you’re pushing too hard for a commitment, we might ghost you as a way to get out of it. From a guy’s perspective, it’s the best way to end things without rejecting you face to face. I’ll admit that’s not always true, but it’s the way some guys think. YOU’RE A BACKUP PLAN. Men who prefer to keep their options open will often ghost a woman who they want to keep on the back burner. Again, I’m not defending this behaviour, but it happens. He may be interested in you but doesn’t want to pursue things right now for whatever reason. He doesn’t want to lead you on, so he ghosts you. However, he might keep your number for a later date. HE’S AVOIDING AN AWKWARD BREAKUP. Come on, how many people have a positive breakup story? At a certain point, you just want to avoid dumping someone at all costs. I mean, it doesn’t feel good to dump someone or explain why you don’t want to see them anymore. Some guys will avoid this if they can, which means their best option is to ghost you. YOU DID SOMETHING WRONG. Okay, not to play the blame game, but guys sometimes have a good reason for ghosting. Keep in mind that some guys can be a little petty or oversensitive, especially early in relationships. It’s possible that a woman says or does something to turn a guy off without realizing it. When this happens, guys will feel justified in ghosting a woman, which is part of what makes ghosting so frustrating. YOU’RE NOT COMPATIBLE. When A Man Disappears Without An Explanation. Sometimes guys decide unilaterally that you aren’t compatible as a couple. If he doesn’t see the relationship moving forward, he might decide that ghosting is his best option. You may not even realize that he feels this way, but it’s possible that you mentioned a political or religious perspective that clashes with his beliefs. It could even be something less important than that. Ghosting you is how he gets out of it without confrontation. Why He’s Gone Conclusion Why He’s Gone Conclusion. Some guys catch on that you want something more serious, so they disappear. If you are still asking why he pursued me and then disappeared – this is a likely reason. Why He’s Gone Conclusion. Men often leave thinking it’s nicer and less confrontational than some ugly emotional scene when you realize he’s not going to stick around. Further reading Dating coach Homepage RELATIONSHIP COUNSELLING NEAR ME NOW Relationship Courses All Services Editorial Improve my relationship I think my boyfriend is cheating on me Family Therapy Overwhelmed meaning Ghosted PTSD quotes Cheating quotes Relationship poems What to do if a guy doesn’t text you for a week Stages of a rebound relationship Feeling used I am too scared to date again 9 texts to never send a man or woman I still love my ex Do you have anger issues please take the test click here Do guys notice when you ignore them Why can’t I get over my ex who treated me badly? Communal Narcissism Emotional cheating texting Narcissist love bombing