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Narcissist Hurt Me

Narcissist Hurt Me

Narcissist hurt me

Narcissist Hurt Me. If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, you will have been through a roller-coaster of ups and downs.

 

In the beginning, everything would have been wonderful. You might have even thought you’d found your soul mate. But after a while, things started to go sour.

 

This is because after a few weeks, months, or even years, the narcissist will no longer see any value in you.

 

As soon as they realise you are a real human being, and thus flawed, they struggle to see the use of you anymore.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me. They’ll start blaming you for things, shouting at you, or even breaking up with you, leaving you to try and work out what went wrong.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me. Narcissists are self-protective, and they have their antenna out for disrespect, or someone taking something from them, and underneath they’re very insecure.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me. They are a whole range of hyper-sensitive people, who lack empathy, for one reason or another, they don’t feel bad when you feel bad, so they can hurt you without realising it.

 

Despite this, a narcissist’s feelings can be hurt very easily. Because of their high sensitivity, any small thing their partner does can be seen as an attack, and any situation where they are not their partner’s focus is very difficult for them.

 

For whatever reason, you’re seeing a person who is wildly insecure and has no real inner confidence that they can depend on. They depend on external validation.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me. Narcissists are very insecure and sensitive people, which means they can take offence very easily.

This can end up in couples having the same arguments over and over again.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me. Sometimes they are unaware of being abusive to their partners, but other times they will genuinely want to cause them harm.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me. Ultimately, as their partner, you have to decide whether the hard work is worth it for you in the long run.

 

Without this constant validation by their partner, the narcissist isn’t getting what they want, and they end up seeking it elsewhere. This is why many narcissists often end up cheating.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me. In the heat of a moment, narcissists can come across as incredibly cruel. They say things that many people would struggle to say to someone they supposedly love.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me. When the narcissist is shouting at you for whatever they think you did, there are no memories of the good times in their head.

 

They are living in the single moment of being furious with you. At that moment, they truly hate you.

 

In some ways, it isn’t worth working out what their intentions are because the results are the same.

 

People in relationships with narcissists find themselves wrapped up in the same arguments time and time again.

 

This is often followed by the punishment which could be an explosive confrontation, or cold silent treatment, depending on the type of narcissist they are with.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me. Sometimes, the narcissist doesn’t mean to hurt you. Being sensitive to everything is just how their brains work. And if they are by their logic being attacked, they will bite back even harder.

 

Ultimately, it is draining to be in a relationship with a narcissist, and you have to accept the fact they will never empathise with your feelings, no matter how long you are together.

 

Some may learn to be self-aware in time and learn to notice when they are hurting you. But this still doesn’t guarantee they will care.

How Do Narcissists Hurt You?

how do Narcissist hurt you

How Do Narcissists Hurt You? Most narcissists enjoy an irrational and brief burst of relief after having suffered emotionally (“narcissistic injury”) or after having sustained a loss.

 

It is a sense of freedom, which comes with being unshackled. Having lost everything, the narcissist often feels that he has found himself, that he has been re-born, that he has been charged with natal energy, able to take on new challenges and explore new territories.

 

This elation is so addictive, that the narcissist often seeks pain, humiliation, punishment, scorn, and contempt as long as they are public and involve the attention of peers and superiors.

 

Being punished accords with the tormenting inner voices of the narcissist which keep telling him that he is bad, corrupt, and worthy of a penalty.

 

This is the masochistic streak in the narcissist. But the narcissist is also a sadist – albeit an unusual one.

 

The narcissist inflicts pain and abuse on others. He devalues sources of supply, callously and off-handedly abandons them, and discards people, places, partnerships, and friendships unhesitatingly.

 

Some narcissists – though by no means the majority – ENJOY abusing, taunting, tormenting, and freakishly controlling others (“gaslighting”).

 

But most of them do these things absentmindedly, automatically, and, often, even without good reason.

 

What is unusual about the narcissist’s sadistic behaviours – premeditated acts of tormenting others while enjoying their anguished reactions – is that they are goal oriented.

 

“Pure” sadists have no goal in mind except the pursuit of pleasure-pain as an art form. The narcissist, on the other hand, haunts and hunts his victims for a reason – he wants them to reflect his inner state. It is all part of a mechanism called “Projective Identification”.

 

The narcissist’s warped sense of achievement is such that success to them is remaining the centre of attention, being perceived as the best at everything they do and maintaining control over everyone in their life.

 

Their primary way of doing these things is to tear apart the lives of others they resent and those they subconsciously fear that they can never be equal.

 

These are the people who become their victims and narcissists get great joy from hurting them. Most narcissists have the following traits:

 

  • Schadenfreude

Schadenfreude refers to experiencing pleasure or joy when observing or learning about the problems, failures or humiliation of someone else.

 

This is a complex emotion reflecting affective immaturity and dysregulation. It is more commonly seen in young children than in adults.

 

However, some adults also experience it, although most recognize that it is not socially condoned and attempt to hide it.

 

Schadenfreude is commonly found in narcissists and is linked to their lack of empathy, self-doubt and poor self-esteem.

 

They will also usually try to hide it from those other than their victims whose misfortunes they gloat about when alone with them.

 

With others, they might pretend to be sympathetic or use the failure to further create a negative impression of their victim, depending on their goal and how they believe they are being perceived.

 

There are different types of schadenfreude. The type that narcissists display is rivalry based. Everything to a malignant narcissist is viewed as a competition.

 

It comes from the desire to stand out from everyone else and to outperform one’s peers. Since it’s impossible to do this across the board no matter who you are, narcissists seek to create the impression they have done so based on others’ misfortunes.

 

  • Sadism

While schadenfreude is displayed by narcissists, they don’t stop there. Narcissists typically also enjoy being the ones to cause their victims pain.

 

Malignant narcissists use torture and abuse as a means of punishment for perceived slights and to re-establish their sense of superiority and control.

 

If there isn’t even something neutral they can use as a reason to cause someone pain, they will create conflict and keep escalating it until they have an excuse.

 

Sadistic narcissists abuse their victims verbally, mentally, emotionally and sometimes physically.

 

How Do Narcissists Hurt You? They destroy their victim’s self-esteem, constantly demean and humiliate them, erode their confidence, threaten their stability and security, and freely criticize them privately and publicly.

 

How Do Narcissists Hurt You? They tell lies about their victims to deprive them of family and friends, break up their relationships and make it so the person becomes completely dependent on them.

 

  • Self-Esteem and Seeing Others Suffer

Self-esteem is negatively related to the frequency and intensity of both schadenfreude and sadism.

 

Those with lower self-esteem tend to enjoy others’ pain more frequently and intensely than those with high self-esteem.

 

For a narcissist with low self-esteem, someone who is more successful poses a threat to their sense of self. Seeing that person fail or causing them to do so is comforting to the narcissist because they perceive an improvement in their self-concept.

Do Narcissists Know They Hurt You?

Do Narcissist know they hurt you

Do Narcissists Know They Hurt You? They know. If we are being honest with ourselves, we knew that already, didn’t we?

 

Because there were times when we brought our concerns or questions to the table. We asked why.

 

We tried to confirm our suspicions or ask why things didn’t add up. We tried standing up for ourselves.

 

We tried to explain that if only they would stop doing “it” (whatever “it” was) things would be perfect. And then things would be perfect– until the next time they broke our hearts.

 

Do Narcissists Know They Hurt You? They know. Accepting the answer to these questions requires understanding how conscienceless people view the world.

 

At the heart of the answers is the essence of narcissism and what motivates narcissists when they interact with others.

 

Do Narcissists Know They Hurt You? It also depends on the type of narcissist and also on the situation.

 

There is a chess-game-like element to this question, that implies the narcissist is sitting down plotting to hurt the people in his or her life.

 

Their behaviour seems sometimes to be so intentional, from the love-bombing to the painful things we endured and so systematic as well, as we talk to others and compare notes and learn that our stories are so similar it’s difficult to believe that they didn’t plan it on purpose.

 

It seems that they must have found us, purposely love-bombed us with all of the flattery and praise, and then slowly torn us down to gain control over us.

 

It also seems so intentional sometimes when they say things to us and then cruelly smile when they watch us crumple in pain, or just sit there and do nothing while we cry and ask them to stop.

 

Some, however, do not know what they are doing. They flit from relationship to relationship, each time idealizing the new partner and then devaluing them as the flaws of that partner start to reveal themselves and the partner fails to live up to the expectations or starts to disappoint the narcissist by wanting to put his or her attention on something else, such as a hobby or other friends.

 

Others, however, may calculate how to cause distress for no other reason than that they enjoy it.

 

They may relieve their boredom by seeing our emotional displays or knowing that they can get reactions from us.

How Does A Narcissist React When They Can’t Control You?

how does a Narcissist React when they cant control you

How Does A Narcissist React When They Can’t Control You? You probably know by now that narcissists only ever look for one thing and one thing only, and that’s control.

 

Whether in their personal or professional life, folks with this personality disorder need to be in the driving seat and the one calling the shots, otherwise, all hell breaks loose.

 

Although their cunning and manipulative nature means they are often hard to escape, it is still possible to turn the tables on them and take the upper hand.

 

Yet, you’ll need a thick skin to do so because when they feel their power slipping away, they become even more dangerous and abusive; here’s how they react when that happens.

 

How Does A Narcissist React When They Can’t Control You?  When a narcissist loses control over a victim, they’ll do the following

 

  • They become even more devious than before

Whenever a narcissist starts to panic, they step their manipulation up a level and unleash a new realm of rage, which must be said that many of us could never even imagine was possible.

 

They’ll yell, stomp their feet, sulk and do everything in their power to keep you between their grips, even if it means becoming violent and physically abusive.

 

Their goal is to scare you into thinking that you won’t be able to survive or get by without them, meaning that absolutely nothing is off-limits.

 

That’s right, they’ll act like a spoiled child having their favourite toy confiscated, yet their favourite toy is you; their victim.

 

  • They’ll give you the silent treatment

When a narcissist can no longer control you, they try to guilt-trip you into staying, so what better way to do so than by cutting off all forms of communication and acting like you no longer exist to them?

 

Here, we are dealing with very smart people who aim to isolate their victims from their family members and friends, leaving them to believe they have no one else other than their abuser to turn to. Who would have thought that silence could be such a powerful tool?

 

A narcissistic personality disorder means that sufferers will do anything and everything to preserve their image and make their victims look like the guilty party.

 

They’ll spin webs of lies in an attempt to get people to believe that the people they targeted are simply out to get them and jealous of their success and lifestyle.

 

Nothing is off limits here, and they really will go to great lengths to protect their reputation. So if you have recently broken up with your narcissistic pervert, don’t be surprised if you hear of rumours circulating about you on social media, for example.

 

  • They’ll go off the radar

Folks with such passive-aggressive personalities may simply just give you the slip when they believe that you have taken back control.

 

The idea of distancing themselves is to leave their victims with plenty of unanswered questions that will keep them up at night.

 

Plus, for them, being the one who physically goes away will plant terrifying thoughts in the heads of their victims and plunge them into a sense of the unknown about when they’ll show up again.

 

That’s right, when they lose control, they’ll simply decide to ruin your life from miles away.

 

  • They might even stalk you

Because what’s scarier than the idea of being tracked everywhere?

 

These vengeful beings aren’t above inflicting a last dose of terror on their prey and often become obsessed with the idea of wrecking people’s lives by constantly lurking in the shadows.

 

The thought of making folks look over their shoulder excites them and makes them feel omnipotent.

 

  • They’ll go into denial mode

‘No, I’d never dream of doing that ‘is probably their most used phrase. When their reputation is at stake, they’ll become the most sophisticated liars around and will refuse to accept and acknowledge the truth.

 

Accepting they are in the wrong is completely out of the question, meaning they’ll fight to the bitter end to preserve their image, even if it involves making ludicrous claims and painting themselves out as the victim.

 

  • They’ll humiliate you

Whether it’s by revealing your deepest, darkest secrets or repeating things that you’ve said about other people, a narcissist will use your past against you in an attempt to burn bridges with your loved ones.

 

When they feel like the control is slipping from their fingers, these personalities will become obsessed with making you look like a bad person.

 

  • They’ll try to get a reaction out of you

Intense narcissistic rage means that these folks naturally know how to push their victim’s buttons to make them feel even worse.

 

They are great at analyzing other people’s weaknesses and don’t hold back when it comes to exploiting them for their gain.

 

They’ll believe they’ve hit the jackpot if they can make their victims break down and seem unstable or unreliable.

 

  • They’ll make you want them back

They know how to charm people, and this is what makes them so successful in the art of lies and deception.

 

Their naturally manipulative characters help them read situations and turn them around to their advantage.

 

The truth is their analytic skills mixed with their appreciation for love bombing make them hard to resist, especially when they promise to change and become better.

 

They know how to guilt-trip and aren’t afraid to do so to get what they want, even if it involves blatant manipulation and lies.

 

Plus, they never respect any boundaries and will therefore make it impossible for their victims to forget them.

 

How Do You Stop A Narcissist from Hurting You?

how do you stop a Narcissist from Hurting You

How Do You Stop A Narcissist from Hurting You? Dealing with a narcissist, whether a romantic partner, roommate or family member, can be challenging.

 

Learning all you can about narcissistic traits and understanding some of the ways to deal with them can help you feel better able to cope.

 

Dealing with a narcissist can be exhausting and stressful. It can make it difficult to be comfortable in your home or workplace and can be detrimental to your mental well-being.

 

Finding ways to cope is important. Understanding what makes narcissists tick and exploring some key coping strategies can help you manage your relationship with the narcissist while preserving your mental health.

 

How Do You Stop A Narcissist from Hurting You? Establish (and Enforce) Boundaries

When you are dealing with a narcissist at home or work, one of the most important things that you can do is to set firm boundaries.

 

Boundaries are the things that you are willing and not willing to accept in a relationship. They are non-negotiable limits that tell others what counts as acceptable and tolerable behaviour.

 

For example, you might make it clear that you won’t accept behaviours such as rudeness or name-calling when you are communicating with one another. If they engage in this type of behaviour, the conversation will end.

 

Creating boundaries isn’t an effort to change the other person. Instead, these limits clarify that certain behaviours will not be tolerated. Once you set a boundary, it is important to stick with it. If the other person violates it, immediately enact the consequences.

 

How Do You Stop A Narcissist from Hurting You? Boost Your Self-Esteem

A narcissistic person often undermines others to boost their sense of self.

 

This can be particularly damaging when the person is always running you down in subtle and non-subtle ways. The workplace is especially vulnerable to this kind of behaviour.

 

To help ensure that you have the mental strength to cope, make sure that your self-esteem remains healthy, even in the face of challenges.

 

Keep an assertive attitude; narcissists gravitate toward people who enable their antics.

 

However, remember that people with low self-esteem, weak boundaries, or a shaky sense of self aren’t the only ones who end up in situations with narcissists.

 

You understandably might be drawn to what seems like confidence and charisma at the beginning of a relationship, but later recognize these traits as narcissism the more you get to know the person.

 

Keeping your self-esteem high and keeping an assertive stance, even if the narcissist tries to manipulate and undercut you, can help you navigate the more interpersonally harmful behaviours.

 

Find Support

Dealing with a narcissist’s dysfunctional and sometimes abusive behaviour can be exhausting.

 

Maintaining healthy relationships with others who are caring and supportive is especially important when you have a relationship with a narcissist, whether they’re a roommate, family member, romantic partner, or coworker.

 

Having other people you can turn to talk about what you are coping with can be a way to get emotional support and perspective.

 

Look for healthy relationships with other people in which you listen to one another. You should feel free to be your real self around them, secure in the knowledge that they accept you for who you are.

 

At work, resist the urge to gossip and vent; remember, the narcissist is adept at turning your words against you.

 

However, do keep your superior apprised of the narcissist’s behaviour privately to help circumvent the narcissist’s efforts to undermine you.

 

If being around the narcissist is causing you distress and making it difficult to function normally, consider ending the relationship. This might mean leaving the situation altogether.

 

If the situation has turned abusive or otherwise dangerous, seek help as soon as possible. Don’t expect the narcissist to change on their own; the cycle of abuse/love bombing is likely to continue until the narcissist gets the help they need.

Why Do Narcissists Want To Destroy You?

Why do Narcissist want to Destroy You

Why Do Narcissists Want To Destroy You? I don’t believe that they are deliberately out to destroy people per se.

 

They are at war with themselves and the people around them are invariably hurt as part of the ensuing collateral damage.

 

Because they lack any kind of empathy, they simply don’t care that this is what they do to others.

 

It’s all about them, and such is their dire need for narcissistic supply they’ll take it from anyone and everyone regardless of the cost to said person.

 

If they don’t they may have to confront the reality that they, and not their victims, were at fault.

 

And they simply cannot countenance for one second the notion that they are anything other than perfect – being accountable in this way threatens their entire false existence and risks narcissistic collapse.

 

If you cotton on to them, and particularly if you risk exposing them, they will indeed embark on a mission to destroy you.

 

I have absolutely no doubt that many narcs will push their ex to suicide if they can, and I fear that many victims see no other way out.

 

Unbelievable though it may sound, this includes their children. I’m a big advocate of No Contact, severing all ties and getting well away.

 

But the reality is that ties, not least joint kids, make doing so much more difficult than it may seem.

 

Narcs simply do not allow their victims to escape so easily – like a cat playing with a wounded mouse, they must derive a sadistic narcissistic supply to feed their wounded and fragile ego.

 

Doing so is crucial in providing succour to the secret, toxic and twisted “real selves” that is Mr Hyde.

 

This is a fundamental requirement if they are to maintain the charade of their “false self”, the public-facing and thoroughly charming Dr Jekyll.

 

Why Do Narcissists Want To Destroy You? They want to destroy you, so that they can feel their blood, racing at top speeds through their veins. That “Alive” feeling, gives them their Fix of power. That ever-loving “fuel”, that they can not live without.

 

They want to destroy you because you are loving and kind. You feel others’ emotions, their pains and their loneliness. You sense these things and you’ll do almost anything to help others. Your heart is huge with love because you have compassion for others. It’s just who You are! You are,…love!

 

They want to destroy you, because you’re friendly and smile at people you don’t even know and will hold a conversation with them, only because, this is who you are….Charismatic!

 

They want to destroy you because you own nice things that you’ve worked your whole life to own. You know you’re deserving of these things, as they are fruits of your labours/endeavours.

 

They, want to destroy you, for you being the best possible you, that you can be. “They”, want to be like that! To feel that joy that’s so plainly written across your face, because they’ve never felt it, nor, have they even given a rat’s ass as to what some random stranger has to say?…who cares…yet, they envy you, for being able to do that.

 

They want to destroy you because they don’t own what you own and damn it, they want it! It should belong to them, not you. Who cares that you had a bloody job anyway? I’m going to be taking all your shit, so deal with it. It was yours….guess what? Now, it’s mine!

 

Why Do Narcissists Want To Destroy You? They want to destroy you because they are envious, cruel beings that think that they deserve to be you,…but since that can’t happen, they’ll take you into their Hell Life, instead. Now you can be in their shoes, as they hold everything that you have owned and everything that you’ve ever been, over your head.

 

Hurting people’s feelings makes narcissists feel good. They have become addicted to being better than other people. The only way they can be sure is when they make you crumple up with shame, become enraged, fall into despair, or have some other loser emotion.

 

Eventually, if you get your feelings hurt enough, you will be destroyed.

Does A Narcissist Regret Losing You?

Does a Narcissist Regret Losing You

Does A Narcissist Regret Lose You? Realize that people with NPD can’t feel regret. Come to terms with the fact that you can’t make them feel a certain way.

 

Push yourself to move on because the narcissist won’t miss you, they’ll miss whatever they were getting from you. Unfortunately, people with NPD can’t give genuine love.

 

There will be no apologies or remorse, and you may well never hear from them again, regardless of how long your relationship was.

 

Does A Narcissist Regret Losing You? If they do return, it will be because they’ve realised they can get something. If you’re the one who chose to leave, on the other hand, be prepared for begging, pleading or bargaining.

 

Does A Narcissist Regret Losing You? If they feel regret, it is not because they hurt you. It is for losing something that they value.

 

How do you make a narcissist regret discarding you?

Go No Contact. If you’re wondering how to make a narcissist regret losing you, the simplest method is to stop communicating with them.

 

Even when the narcissist discards you, they leave a line of communication open so they can access you whenever they need a dose of narcissistic supply.

 

The best way to make a narcissist regret leaving you is to find happiness within yourself and be satisfied with your own life – WITHOUT HIM!

 

Why Do Narcissists Want To Hurt You?

Why do Narcissist want to hurt you

Why Do Narcissists Want To Hurt You? There is a saying that goes “Hurt people hurt people”. Now, of course, being hurt is not an excuse to hurt other people.

 

Also, not everyone who is hurt will hurt other people. However, some people are emotionally hindered because of trauma and (unconsciously) hurt other people.

 

Someone with a narcissistic personality disorder has rejected his or her true self. Instead, they have created a false self.

 

But their true selves sometimes surface with feelings like “I’m not good,” “I don’t belong,” “People don’t accept me,” “No one can be trusted,” and “Others will hurt me if I don’t hurt them”.

 

So a narcissist, like the victims of narcissistic abuse, is in a permanent survival mode. The true self is too damaged to develop a healthy and solid identity. Therefore, the false self must be continually affirmed.

 

When someone does not confirm that false self-image but instead questions it, they are faced with narcissistic anger.

 

The narcissist then punishes you by hurting you, or in some cases through physical violence.

 

Narcissists believe they have a right to confirmation of their false selves. It doesn’t seem to occur to them that there is something wrong with them themselves. And so they also take no responsibility for their trauma and dysfunction.

 

Why Do Narcissists Want To Hurt You? For the narcissist, you are an extension of their ego. You are purely a tool for their self-medication.

 

In the end, no one will be able to meet these idiotic demands. But a narcissist has no understanding of this.

 

On the contrary, they hold you responsible for their psychological wounds. They will punish you without any pangs of conscience.

 

Why Do Narcissists Want To Hurt You? When you are no longer able to meet the narcissist’s unreasonable demands, the narcissist starts to hate you.

 

They blame you for not being that source of narcissistic supply they thought you were.

 

Then the narcissist will devalue you and look elsewhere for narcissistic supply. So cheating.

 

The victim wonders confusedly why the narcissistic partner has suddenly changed so much. Where has that wonderful person gone that you once fell in love with?

 

The inconvenient truth is that the narcissist was never in love with you. He or she was only interested in you as a narcissistic supply.

 

People tend to look at the world as they see themselves. A narcissist, therefore, thinks that everyone is fake because they are. Other people are to them no more than objects that they can manipulate and abuse at will.

When A Narcissist Sees You Cry

When A Narcissist Sees you cry

When A Narcissist Sees You Cry. When a narcissist sees you cry, don’t expect any kind of sympathy from them.

 

Instead, you’ll be hit with rage, invalidation, blame, projection, punishment and gaslighting.

 

When A Narcissist Sees You Cry. The narcissist doesn’t have the capacity for true empathy, kindness and compassion, therefore seeing you cry is a huge imposition for them

 

Especially if the source of your tears was another person or circumstance, which the narcissist doesn’t benefit from.

 

Not only are you taking precious supplies away from them, but you want them to give to you for five minutes?

 

That’s not going to happen. Your sole purpose is to serve the narcissist, so don’t even bother asking them for a hot minute in your time of need.

 

When A Narcissist Sees You Cry. Narcissists enjoy it when they are the source of your tears. It’s all about power and control for them and making your cry further validates how incredibly powerful and significant they are.

 

For empathetic souls, it’s hard to wrap your head around the fact that they can pillage and take so much, without a shred of remorse.

 

It’s important to realise that without access to their True Self, they are now conscienceless beings.

 

They have zero empathy or compassion and will never be able to experience love. So, without those things, they can do whatever they like without having to bear the weight of guilt or regret.

 

Interestingly, narcissists hate tears that are caused by other, outside sources. If you’re crying because your pet just died or you’re having trouble with a coworker the narcissist does not care.

 

If you’re crying happy tears because your friend just had a baby or your favourite band is coming to town that is unacceptable.

 

If someone else is the cause of your joy or happiness, that doesn’t serve the narcissist in any shape or form, therefore you need to stop those tears.

 

In the instance that you’re crying due to pain or illness, the narcissist will loathe you for that.

 

With that sickness or injury comes the expectation that they will care for you in some way.

 

The narcissist has no interest in helping you in your time of need because that causes a huge imposition for them, which they will refuse.

Telling A Narcissist They Hurt You

Telling A Narcissist they hurt you

Telling A Narcissist They Hurt You. You want to tell the narcissist how badly they’ve hurt you.

 

You want to have healthy communication, and have them hear your thoughts and be considerate of your feelings.

 

You want them to accept responsibility, sincerely apologize and change for the better, right?

 

The only thing you need to know about a narcissist is:

 

They don’t care, they never have, they never will.

 

No ifs, ands or buts about it!

 

They don’t want to hear about how they’ve disrespected or hurt you. They don’t want to face the reality of their actions.

 

All you will be met with is someone who ignores you, dismisses you, gaslights you by making it seem everything is all in your head, gets angry and defensive, and if you push them too far – they will discard you! Adios!!

 

They are not partners. They are not loving, reciprocating, compromising people! The only feelings they care about are their own.

 

The only people they look out for are themselves. They wake up in the morning thinking about them, they spend their days getting their needs met, and they go to sleep consumed with their thoughts and pay no mind to the havoc they’ve wreaked on everyone’s lives!

 

Telling A Narcissist They Hurt You. Not a good idea. However, you’ll be giving the narcissist additional supply by letting them know how much of an effect they have on you.

 

They will only continue to abuse you further by testing to see how much they can get away with! Either way, the only thing you need to know is in the life of a narcissist, you don’t matter.

 

You are simply their temporary toy to play with, and the second you even show signs that you are a normal human being, with normal human thoughts and emotions; its bye bye time and onto the next replacement.

 

Telling A Narcissist They Hurt You. Reasons not to:

 

  • They don’t understand your feelings and are annoyed or angered by them.
  • The responses you get won’t be anything like you need or imagine.
  • They can twist your emotional words into something abusive or crazy, providing more drama or exacerbating a smear campaign.
  • Any apology will be a manipulation. There will be no lasting changes to behaviour.
  • They may give you silent treatment about any such issue.

Will A Narcissist Physically Hurt You?

will a Narcissist Physically Hurt You

Will A Narcissist Physically Hurt You? Not all narcissists resort to physical abuse, some never escalate beyond intimidation. Not all physical abusers are narcissists, some have other mental illnesses.

 

But a narcissistic physical abuser is not someone to take lightly. No matter what they say, you cannot make them better.

 

Narcissistic spouses will blame others for their abusive behaviour. You made me upset, If you don’t say this (or act that way), then I won’t have to get so forceful, or It is because of you that I’m like this are all typical remarks.

 

Usually, these statements are sandwiched between half-hearted apologies (if lucky enough to get one).

 

The bottom line is by the end of the rant their violent response was because of others, not them.

 

Will A Narcissist Physically Hurt You? There are many forms of physical abuse. Just because a mark was not left on a body, does not mean that there wasn’t cruelty, violence, neglect or exploitation. Here is the progression of physical abuse:

 

  • Intimidation

The narcissistic spouse becomes a bully by standing over their prey, looking down or getting in your face and then refusing to back off.

 

They may even throw things, break things, or punch walls and doors dangerously close by. This is a scare tactic designed to frighten into submission by letting their spouse know that they are capable of physical harm.

 

While there is no actual physical contact, the threat of bodily harm is every bit as real as if it had already occurred.

 

  • Isolation

The narcissist substantially limits their spouse’s ability to escape especially in dangerous situations.

 

For instance, they might drive recklessly with no escape out of the car. They might expose others to severe weather or environmental conditions.

 

They might take their spouse to stranded locations. When others are injured, they might prevent the seeking of medical care by minimizing name calling.

 

Will A Narcissist Physically Hurt You? They might destroy important personal items, calling them insignificant. All of this is done to force the spouse to rely solely on them and trust only their judgment.

 

Restraint Physical contact begins in the form of holding a person back. The narcissist will confine their spouse by blocking a doorway, grabbing when trying to leave, locking doors with no key, or tying the person up.

 

This causes a feeling of entrapment or imprisonment without any way to escape. Because they have already demonstrated through isolation their ability to cut a person off, physical restraint becomes a promise of additional aggression.

 

When this begins to happen, it is a warning sign to get out immediately. The next two steps are not that far behind.

 

  • Aggression

It is important to remember that any physical force which results in pain, discomfort or injury is completely unacceptable in a marriage relationship.

 

There are many types of aggression such as: hitting, kicking, punching, arm twisting, pushing, beating, shoving, biting, slapping, striking with an object, shaking, pinching, choking, hair pulling, dragging, burning, cutting, stabbing, strangling, and force-feeding (including overdose or misuse of drugs).

 

Because the narcissist will blame their spouse for their violent behaviour, they will not stop using force once it is started. They will instead find more reasons to justify their brutality.

 

Endangerment This is the most dangerous stage because life is in jeopardy. The intimidation and isolation become so ordinary that the spouse is numb to the effects.

 

Restraint becomes a waiting game that the spouse has mastered. Aggression is expected and no longer shocks them.

 

The narcissist then realizes they are no longer commanding the same level of fear, so they escalate the attacks.

 

Verbal threats of killing their spouse, family members or themselves are mixed with physical violence and the use of weapons. Do not stay. Get out immediately.

Narcissist Wants To See You Suffer

Narcissist wants to see you Suffer

Narcissist Wants To See You Suffer. I don’t think a narcissist ‘enjoys’ watching you suffer as much as the narcissist ‘enjoys’ being ‘responsible’ for your ‘suffering’.

 

Especially, if the narcissist thinks you’re unaware that it was them who caused your suffering”.

 

Narcissist Wants To See You Suffer.  If your ‘suffering’ has nothing to do with them, then their reaction is more apt to be anger rather than enjoyment.

 

Everything you do or don’t do has to somehow be about the narcissist and that includes ‘suffering’.

 

Their ‘enjoyment’ comes in the power, control, and superiority they ‘feel’ over being ‘responsible’ for your ‘suffering’.

 

A narcissist may ‘enjoy’ any sympathy or support he/she can get because of your ‘suffering’.

 

Usually, if your ‘suffering’ is not because of the narcissist and the narcissist can’t somehow benefit from your ‘suffering’, that ‘suffering’ will be met with anger or total indifference.

 

Narcissist Wants To See You Suffer. You’re often fooled into thinking the narcissist is ‘trying to cheer you up when you’re ‘suffering’ when in reality the narcissist simply can’t hide his/her ‘joy’ over being ‘responsible’ for or benefiting from your ‘suffering’.

 

They ‘enjoy’ watching you ‘suffer’ simply because it’s NOT them ‘suffering’ and being able to be ‘responsible’ for your ‘suffering’ makes them feel powerful and in control.

 

I think it’s absolute bullshit when told a narcissist “don’t mean to do that” or is “not responsible for doing that” because SOMEBODY may or may not have made them ‘suffer’ at some point in their life

 

Because narcissists exist in a state of terminal boredom. They are excitement addicts and knowing you are hurt, angry or sad gives them a temporary fix for their addiction. The more you cry or fight back, the happier they are.

 

It is that same need for constant stimulation that drives them to be impulse shoppers, gamblers, sex addicts, drug users and alcoholics.

 

Anything, especially causing others pain, calms the monster that lurks inside them. For a little while anyway.

 Do Narcissists Feel Bad For Hurting You?

do Narcissists feel bad for Hurting You

Do Narcissists Feel Bad For Hurting You? Narcissists do not feel guilty about abusing their loved ones because they convince themselves that whatever they do is justified.

 

Narcissistic defences are designed to distort reality and protect narcissists from seeing their flaws and mistakes. Narcissistic love is more transactional and shallow than it appears to be.

 

The sad truth is that the people I know who qualify for a diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder are highly unlikely to think about the moral implications of whatever they have done to other people.

 

Do Narcissists Feel Bad For Hurting You? They only care about themselves. Even when they claim to be madly in love with you, their feelings are quite shallow and will quickly disappear if you stop meeting their needs.

 

Narcissistic relationships are transactional.

By transactional, I mean that narcissists like you and want you around when you serve their needs.

 

They lose interest in you when you do not. No matter how much they claim to love you, the reality is that it is not you, the individual, that they love. They love the functions you perform for them.

 

This makes their attachment to you much shallower than it appears. If you lose the attributes that they value, their loving feelings about you are likely to disappear.

 

This means that if you get ill, lose your looks, your money, or your ability to have sex. Your narcissistic lover will not be sympathetic.

 

Do Narcissists Feel Bad For Hurting You? Instead of feeling bad for you, they are likely to become impatient, complain, and eventually lose interest in being with you.

Do Narcissists Have Feelings For Others?

do Narcissists have feelings for others

Do Narcissists Have Feelings For Others? Deep inside them, narcissists hope and desire to be loved and cared for, but usually, they feel uncomfortable when the love and care they desire begin to manifest.

 

All they know is self-love; hence, they doubt the authenticity of the love, respect, and attention their partner, spouse, or others may show them.

 

Do Narcissists Have Feelings For Others? They hardly do due to the following reasons

  • Absence of empathy

Narcissistic behaviour in relationships involves withholding affection from their partner. It takes the possession of empathy to love.

 

Empathy is the intellectual identification of the thoughts, feelings, or state of another person. But because narcissists are focused on self-love, self-centeredness, etc., they lack the empathy to express love entirely.

 

  • A selfish character

Rather than being selfish, selflessness is one of the foundational characteristics of love. True love is defined by how much we are willing to give and not just to receive.

 

A narcissist is mainly focused on himself and will rarely make sacrifices for his partner

 

Do Narcissists Have Feelings For Others? Narcissists are typically characterized by a lack of empathy.

 

However, the greater truth is that they can understand the pain, thoughts, and emotions of others, but not feel the same emotions or get moved by their suffering to act in compassion. Still, they can train themselves to be good at faking emotional empathy.

 

Narcissists, driven by the desire to feel appreciated, can expertly fake emotional empathy.

 

They use their intellectual empathy to figure out what emotion they should be feeling in response to the person they are interacting with. Then they use their acting skills to mimic that emotion to fit in.

 

So, while they can fairly accurately read what’s going on in your mind, they cannot feel the same emotions as you are going through.

Narcissist Hit Me

Narcissist hit me

Narcissist Hit Me. Narcissists tend to dish out increasing levels of abuse the longer you stay with them.

 

It results from the devaluation phase all Narcissists cycle through as time passes with any given partner.

 

Narcissist Hit Me. Also, they will systematically push at your boundaries, such as escalating any arguments’ intensity, and starting to argue more frequently and over ridiculous things, just to have an excuse to physically abuse their partner.

 

It’s like they hope you’ll excuse it if hitting is done in the heat of an argument. Narcs are bullies. Narcs won’t hesitate to hurt anyone who is vulnerable or gets in their way.

 

Because they only care to protect their self-righteous image, they’ll practice self-control, and resist the temptation of beating you dead.

 

They’re a loose cannon and they will strike you over and over and over, in cycles, in circles, up and down and sideways in every emotional way possible, because this is harder to prove than leaving a physical trail of marks and bruising.

 

Narcs are cynical, cold-blooded, leeches who have plenty of resilience and self-control when used for their selfish reasons. In public and at home, if they share a home with others, they hold back from doing what they want to do to you, this is why the covert is quiet.

 

Narcs enjoy their freedom too much and can’t stand authoritative figures watching over them so they avoid doing anything to provoke an arrest at all costs; God forbid they tarnish their reputation.

 

If it weren’t for the important image they must uphold in society, they would lash out in rage, beat anyone they disagree with to a pulp, and leave them to die.

 

Unlike many criminals, they would criticize you, and then poke fun at what just happened, and blame you for that too.

 

Narcissist Hit Me. These individuals have so much rage, their whole world revolves around it; they hurt others for the most absurd causes. They are petty, jealous, cruel people.

 

Occasionally, they’ll meet someone who complements their style (another bully)and they’ll gain up against the ‘little’ person.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me Conclusion

Narcissist hurt me conclusion

Narcissist Hurt Me Conclusion. Narcissists cannot put themselves in our shoes and feel our suffering, so though they may understand that they will inflict harm on you at those moments, it does not register at an emotional level with them, as they do not feel sufficiently attached or bonded emotionally to anyone enough to care if they feel pain or not.

 

Narcissist Hurt Me Conclusion. They largely care only about their pleasure and avoidance of pain.

 

Though they may not always intentionally harm others, they are largely indifferent to it. Stay away from them as much as possible.

Further reading

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